Miles opened the door and pushed Brian out, forcing him onto the porch.
“You don’t understand!”
Miles ignored her. He grabbed Brian’s arm and began dragging him toward the car. It was difficult for Brian to keep his balance, and he stumbled. Sarah rushed up behind them.
“Miles!”
Miles spun around. “I want you out of my life,” he hissed.
The hatred in his voice shocked Sarah into stopping.
“You betrayed me,” Miles said. “You used me.” He didn’t wait for Sarah to respond. “You wanted to try to make things better-not for me and Jonah, but for you and Brian. You thought if you did that, you’d feel better about yourself.” She paled, incapable of saying anything.
“You knew from the beginning,” he went on. “And you were willing to let me go on without ever knowing the truth until someone else got arrested for it.”
“No, that’s not the way it happened-”
“Stop lying to me!” he boomed. “How the hell can you live with yourself?” The comment lashed at her, and she responded defensively. “You’ve got it all wrong, and you don’t even care.”
“I don’t care? I’m not the one who did anything wrong here.”
“Neither did I.”
“And you expect me to believe that?”
“It’s the truth!” Then, despite her anger, Brian saw her eyes begin to well up with tears.
Miles paused momentarily but showed no sympathy at all. “You don’t even know what the truth is.”
With that, he turned and opened the door to the car. He shoved Brian in, then slammed the door and reached in his pocket for his keys. He pulled them out as he got in behind the wheel.
Sarah was too shocked to say anything more. She watched as Miles started the car, pressed the accelerator, then jammed the car into gear. The tires squealed as the car moved into reverse, backing toward the road. Miles never glanced her way, and a moment later, he vanished from sight.
Chapter 33
Miles drove erratically, smashing the accelerator and slamming on the brakes, as if testing how hard he could push the car before one or the other ceased to work. More than once, his arms locked behind him, Brian nearly toppled over as the car careened through a turn. From his vantage point, Brian could see the muscle in Miles’s jaw tensing and relaxing, as if someone were flicking a switch. Miles held the wheel with both hands, and though he seemed to be concentrating on the road, his eyes continually darted to the rearview mirror, where they sometimes caught Brian’s.
Brian could see the anger in his eyes. It was reflected plainly in the mirror, yet at the same time, he saw something else there, something he hadn’t expected. He saw the anguish in Miles’s eyes, and Brian was reminded of the way Miles had looked at Missy’s funeral, trying and failing to make sense of all that had happened. Brian wasn’t sure if the anguish Miles was feeling came from Missy or Sarah, or even both. All he knew was that it didn’t have anything to do with him.
From the corner of his eye, Brian watched the trees whizzing past his window. The road curved, and again Miles took the turn without slowing down. Brian planted his feet; despite that, his body shifted and he slid toward the window. In a few minutes, he knew, they would pass the spot of Missy’s accident.
The Good Shepherd Community Church was located in Pollocksville, and the driver of the church van, Bennie Wiggins, had never had so much as a speeding ticket in his fifty-four years of driving. Though it was a source of pride for Bennie, the reverend would have asked him to drive even if his record hadn’t been so good. Volunteers were hard to find, especially when the weather wasn’t so good, but Bennie was one he could always count on.
On that morning, the reverend had asked Bennie to drive the van to New Bern to pick up the donations of food and clothing that had been collected over the weekend, and Bennie had shown up promptly. He’d driven in, had a cup of coffee and two doughnuts while he waited for others to load the van, then had thanked everyone for their help before getting behind the wheel to head back to the church.
It was a little before ten when he turned onto Madame Moore’s Lane. He reached for the radio, hoping to find some gospel music to liven up the ride back. Even though the road was slick, he began fiddling with the knob. Up ahead and out of sight, he had no way of knowing that another car was heading his way.
“I’m sorry,” Brian finally said, “I didn’t mean for any of it to happen.” At the sound of his voice, Miles glanced in the mirror again. Instead of responding, however, he cracked the window.
Cold air rushed in. After a moment, Brian huddled down, his unzipped jacket flapping in the wind.
In the reflection, Miles stared at Brian with unbridled hatred.
Sarah sped around the corner much as Miles had done, hoping to catch up with his car. He had a head start-not much, maybe a couple of minutes, but how far was that? A mile? More? She wasn’t exactly sure, and as the car hit a straight stretch, she pressed the accelerator even harder.
She had to catch them. She couldn’t leave Brian in his care, not after the uncontrolled fury she had seen in his face, not after what he’d nearly done to Otis.
She wanted to be there when Miles brought Brian in, but the problem was that she didn’t know where the sheriff’s department was. She knew where the police station was, the courthouse, even the City Hall, since they were all located downtown. But she’d never been to the sheriff’s department. For all she knew, it was located in the outer reaches of the county somewhere. She could stop and call, or check a phonebook somewhere, but that would only put her farther behind, she thought frantically. She would stop if she had to. If she didn’t see him in the next couple of minutes…
Commercials.
Bennie Wiggins shook his head. Commercials and more commercials. That’s all there was on the radio these days. Water softeners, car dealerships, alarm systems… after every other song, he heard the same litany of businesses hawking their wares.
The sun was beginning to peek over the treetops, and the glare from the snow caught Bennie off-guard. He squinted and pulled down the visor just as the radio faded into silence for a moment.
Another commercial. This one promised to teach your child to read. He reached for the knob.
“Sarah didn’t know,” Brian finally offered into the silence. “Sarah didn’t know about any of it.”
Over the wind, Brian wasn’t sure if Miles could hear him, but he had to try. He knew this was the last chance he would get to speak to Miles without other people around. Whatever lawyer his father would arrange for him would advise him to say nothing more than he had already said. And Miles, he suspected, would be ordered to stay away from him.
But Miles had to know the truth about Sarah. Not so much for the future-as Brian saw it, they had no chance at all-but because he couldn’t bear the thought of Miles believing that Sarah had known all along. He didn’t want Miles to hate her. Sarah, above everyone, didn’t deserve that. Unlike Miles or him, Sarah hadn’t had any part in this at all.
“She never told me who she was seeing. I was away at school and I didn’t find out until Thanksgiving that it was you. But I didn’t tell her about the accident until yesterday. She didn’t know anything until then. I know you don’t want to believe me…”
“You think I should believe you?” Miles shot back.
“She didn’t know anything,” Brian repeated. “I wouldn’t lie to you about that.”
“What would you lie about, then?”
Brian regretted the words as soon as he’d said them and felt the chill cut through him as he imagined his answer.Going to the funeral. His dreams. Watching Jonah at school. Stalking Miles at his home…