I’m fucking warning you Tammas; dont you ever fucking do that to me again. Or you’re fucking dead. Ye listening? D’you know what I’m talking about? You’re fucking dead!
Tammas was gazing at him.
You hear what I’m saying?
Tammas made no answer.
Eh?
And Billy was now tugging at him on the elbow. Hey man hey come on, let’s go, let’s go man, let’s go — out of this fucking place man, fucking bastards, let’s go. .
Tammas rubbed at his neck again and coughed. Over McCann’s shoulder he could see Auld Roper making signs, gesticulating, pointing at the exit. . He made no acknowledgment but continued gazing in the direction of McCann.
McCann was staring back at him.
And now Billy’s hand was on his shoulder and pulling him backwards and he said, Aye, aye, I’m coming. . And he saw the barmen staring at him and also a couple of guys standing up by the bar, all staring at him.
Outside on the pavement Billy took him by the arm. Tammas was shaking his head, still rubbing at his neck, Come on man. . Billy was patting him now on the shoulder.
Fucking bastard, said Tammas, fucking bastard.
I know man I know he’s a fucking, a fucking bastard man a bastard, you dont worry about him man a cunt like that, you dont worry about cunts like that man dirty fucking bastard.
Whhh Jesus. . Tammas shook his head from side to side, making a grunting blowing noise, his eyelids shut and with his shoulder now leaning against the tenement wall; then he was seeing an old woman staring at him — she was standing some yards away at a bus stop, standing staring at him. He turned his head, putting his hand over his eyes, and walked on, Billy going with him.
They were walking in the direction of where Billy lived, neither speaking, not looking at each other till eventually Tammas paused a little bringing out the cigarettes, and they got them lighted, and then he led the way across the road and round the next corner. And Billy said, Going to the betting shop?
Aye. Tammas sniffed. A horse I fancy in the next.
You alright?
Aye.
Neck?
Aye, okay. . Fucking nearly strangled me so he did.
Billy nodded. As they entered the doorway of the betting shop Tammas palmed him a £5 note but he frowned and muttered, What the fuck’s this for?
Tammas shrugged.
I dont want it. . Billy held it upwards as though to return it.
Och stick it in your pocket man it’s just to have a bet.
Billy shook his head but he took the money and he followed Tammas into the shop.
It was very busy inside and each went to different formpages. Then Tammas checked the previous races’ results. Neither of the first two runners of the three he fancied earlier had managed to gain even a place. He counted the money he had left and then stuck it all onto the third one. When he was writing out the line he saw Billy across the room, also writing out a line. They went to different pay-in windows, then stood together to hear the commentary. The horse Tammas had backed fell at the 2nd fence. But neither he nor Billy had mentioned their selections to the other, and after a moment he muttered, I need a slash man. . And he crossed in the direction of the lavatory, leaving Billy engrossed in the commentary. Outside he began running. It was after 3 o’clock. He ran over the road and cut through the back of a close, crossing backcourts to avoid passing Simpson’s, and on to his own street and up the stairs to collect the bankbook.
The bank was almost empty. He scribbled a withdrawal slip for the £44. The clerk gazed at it and at the figures in the bankbook. Is that you closing the account altogether? he asked.
Well eh. . Tammas sniffed. Naw, just give me the forty three.
The clerk nodded. But you’ll need to alter it and initial it. . and he returned him the slip.
Billy signalled to him when he arrived back in the bookmaker’s. D’you catch it?
Nah.
Billy nodded. No me either! First favourite of the day as well! Could’ve been backed.
Mm. . Tammas had taken out his cigarettes; he offered Billy one but he declined.
I’m smoking too much these days, he said. And he glanced at Tammas’s neck and pointed at it: Alright man? Looks hell of a red.
Tammas nodded. A wee bit sore.
Fucking McCann! Billy shook his head, he cleared his throat and spat in between his feet, scraping his shoe over it. And when Tammas did not reply he added, Now I know how you were wanting to give it the go bye!
Tammas looked at him.
Naw I mean. . Billy smiled. You werent wanting to go in the first place man it was me fucking dragged you — Simpson’s I’m talking about.
Aw aye, hh. Tammas inhaled on the cigarette and a moment later he walked to a wall to look at one of the formpages.
•••
The bedroom door being opened roused him but the light was not switched on and he kept his eyelids shut and stayed in the same position, and soon the door closed, clicking shut.
Later on Margaret entered, she walked straight in and put her hand onto his shoulder, and he turned over to lie on his back. I didnt want to waken you, she said, but I know you never took your tea; and me and Robert’s just about to have some supper.
Mm.
It’s nearly midnight.
He sniffed and squinted at the alarm clock, raising himself onto his elbows.
You’ve been sleeping for ages Tammas.
Aye; I was tired.
She smiled. When he squinted over at the clock again she said, Will I put on the light?
Nah, I think I’ll just stay here. . He lay down and tugged the blankets up to his chin.
Are you okay?
Okay? Aye.
Are you sure?
Aye, fine.
You dont seem fine.
Well I am.
She nodded.
Honest. Honest Margaret.
It’s toast and cheese we’re having if you’re interested.
Eh — naw, ta, I’ll no bother.
Tch, Tammas.
Honest Margaret I’m just no hungry.
Well you’ll take a cup of tea surely!
Aye.
Well thank goodness for that!
Once she had gone he waited a moment then sat up and reached to switch on the bedside lamp. He lifted the cigarette packet; only one remained inside. He left it on top of the packet and lay down again, but only for a brief period, then he got up out of bed and pulled the curtains open about a foot in width. Margaret’s footsteps in the lobby. He jumped back into bed and tugged up the blankets. When she came in she was carrying a teaplate with a slice of toast and cheese on it, as well as a cup of tea. Dont eat it if you dont feel like it, she said.
He nodded. Thanks.
She paused by the door. Goodnight.
Goodnight.
She shut the door. Tammas sat up, punched the pillow in at his back, lifted over the teaplate.
•••
He was awake before the alarm went off. It was 5 am and some birds had been whistling for maybe twenty minutes although it still seemed dark outside. He waited until the click occurred just prior to the bell and quickly stretched across and tapped down the button, and he got out of bed immediately. Once he had dressed he opened the wardrobe door and took out his big travelling bag. It was already packed. He laid it on the bed. Beside it he laid the bankbook, the UB40, the cigarette and box of matches. He took his boots from the bottom of the wardrobe and placed them on the floor down from the bag, lifted his jerkin from its hanger and folded it next to the bankbook. Then he knelt and looked beneath the bed, and stood up and looked about the room, going into the drawers in the cupboard and checking along the window-sill and all other places where things could be lying.
And afterwards, he went into the bathroom for a piss and then washed and collected his toothbrush and shaving gear, and back in the bedroom he unzipped a side pocket in the travelling bag and stuffed them in.