"They mustn't tell his father," Mary said suddenly. "It'll just kill his father."
"I don't see how they can avoid it," Hannah said. "Mary says they mustn't tell his, Jay's, father," Hannah told her brother. "In his condition the news might kill him. I told her I simply don't see how they can avoid it. They'll have to account for coming away to the funeral, after all."
"Just tell him he's hurt," Joel said.
Mary hurried into the hall. "Andrew," she whispered loudly. With a contortion of the face which terrified her he slapped his hand through the air at her as if she had been a mosquito. "Just that one place, on the point of the chin," he was saying. He turned to Mary, but the voice held him and he turned away. "He may have driven for miles that way. They don't know. They looked all around and quite a distance up the road-yes, of course with flashlights-and they couldn't find it." Again she heard the voice, squirming like a wire. "No, they haven't any idea. Except that there are some very rough stretches in those roads and Jay was driving very fast. Just a minute, Ralph." He covered the mouthpiece. "What is it, Mary?"
She could hear the distraught and squirming voice. Like a worm on a hook, she thought. Poor nasty fat thing! "Tell Ralph not to tell his father," she whispered. "In his condition it might kill him. If they have to say anything, about-coming down-tell him he's hurt." Andrew nodded.
"Ralph," he said. "Go away," he whispered, for she was lingering. "We just want to remind you, it might be very dangerous to your father" (by now Mary heard him through the door; she took her seat) "if he heard this now. Of course you and your mother'll know best but in case you have to explain, when you come away to the funeral, it might be better just to say that Jay's been hurt; not in danger. Don't you think?
"What did you say?
"Why no, we… "He's at Roberts'. I came in with him tonight.
"Why I'd suppose that…"
"Oh heavens!" Mary said, loudly enough that her father jumped. "Ralph's an undertaker!"
"Of course, I see your point, Ralph.
"No. Not yet.
"Well the saving of money is not a question in this…
"Look here, Ralph, will you just…
"Will you just hold the phone a minute, please? I really think we should leave this up to Mary, don't you?
"Of course she does. You too. I…
"I don't doubt it at all.
"No, I appreciate it very deeply, Ralph, and I know Mary will, but just let me consult her wishes on it, please. Just wait."
They heard his rapid walk and he thrust his infuriated face into the room.
"Ralph," he announced, "is an undertaker. I imagine you know what he wants. I told him it was up to you to decide."
"Good-God!" Joel exclaimed.
"Andrew, you'll have to tell him-I-just simply can't."
"He's blaming himself for Jay's… He wants to try to make up for it."
"How on earth can he blame himself!"
"For phoning Jay in the first place."
"What nonsense," Hannah said.
"But Jay's already at Ro…"
"Ralph says that's easily arranged. He can come down first thing tomorrow."
"Well, then we just can't. We just won't, no matter what. Tell him how very very much I appreciate it and thank him, but I just can't. Tell him I'm prostrated. I don't care what you tell him, you handle it, Andrew."
"I'll handle it." He went back to the phone. "Seems downright incestuous," Joel said.
His sister laughed harshly.
"Nothing important, Mama," Mary said. "Just-arrangements about the funeral."
Nothing important! Joel thought. People can only get through these things by being blind at least half the time. No: she was just cutting a corner for Catherine.
"When will the ceremony be held?"
Hannah stifled a laugh and Joel did not. Mary's face worked curiously with a smile as she told her mother, "We don't know yet. This was a question of where. Here or LaFollette?"
"I would have supposed that his home was Knoxville."
"We think so, too. That's how it's settled."
"That seems as it should be."
Andrew came in. "Well," he said, "it was either Ralph or you and I chose you."
"Oh, Andrew, you must have hurt him."
"There wasn't any way out He just wouldn't take no for an answer."
"He's going to make an awful case of it to his mother."
"Well he'll just have to, then."
"She's got sense, Mary," Hannah said.
"I'm going to have a drink," Andrew said. "God!" he groaned. "Talking to that fool is like trying to put socks on an octopus!"
"Why, Andrew," Mary laughed; she had never heard the expression. "I'm very grateful to you, dear," she said. "You must be worn to a frazzle."
"We all are," Hannah said. "You most of all, Mary. We better think about getting some sleep."
"I suppose we must, but I really don't feel as if I could sleep. You-all better though."
"We're all right," Andrew said. "Except maybe Mama. And Papa, you'd b…"
"Never sleep before two in the morning," Joel said. "You know that."
"Let me fix you a good stiff hot toddy," Hannah said. "It'll help you sleep."
"It all just seems to wake me up."
"Hot."
"Maybe just some hot milk. No I won't, either," she cried out, with sudden tears; they looked at her and looked away; she soon had control of herself.
"One of the last things Jay did for me," she explained, "way early in the morning before he-went away. He fixed me some hot milk to help me sleep." She began to cry again. "Bless his heart," she said. "Bless his dear heart."
"You know almost the last thing he said to me?
"He asked me to think what I wanted for my birthday.
" 'Within reason,' he said. He was just joking.
"And he said not to wait supper, but he'd-he'd try to be back before the children were asleep, for sure."
She'd feel better later on if she'd kept a few of these things to herself, Joel thought.
Or would she. I would. But I'm not Poll.
"Rufus just-wouldn't give up. He just wouldn't go to sleep. He was so proud of that cap, Aunt Hannah. He wanted so much to show it to his father."
Hannah came over to her and leaned to her, an arm around her shoulder.
"Talk if you want to, Mary," she said. "If you think it does you good. But try not to harp on these things."
"And I was so mad at him, only a few hours ago, for not phoning all day, and because of Rufus. I had such a good supper ready, and I did wait it, and…"
"It wasn't his fault it was good," Hannah said.
"Of course it isn't his fault and I had no business waiting it but I did, and I was so angry with him-why I even-I even…"
But this she found she would not tell them. I even thought he was drunk, she said to herself. And if he was, why what in the world of it. Let's hope if he was he really loved being, God bless him always. Always.
And then a terrifying thought occurred to her, and she looked at Andrew. No, she thought, he wouldn't lie to me if it were so. No, I won't even ask it. I won't even imagine it. I just don't see how I could bear to live if that were so.
But there he was, all that day, with Ralph. He must have. Well he probably did. That was no part of the promise. But not really drunk. Not so he couldn't-navigate. Drive well.
No.
Oh, no.
No I won't even dishonor his dear memory by asking. Not even Andrew in secret. No, I won't.
And she thought with such exactness and with such love of her husband's face, and of his voice, and of his hands, and of his way of smiling so warmly even though his eyes almost never lost their sadness, that she succeeded in driving the other thought from her mind.
"Hark!" Hannah whispered.
"What is it?"
"Ssh! Listen."