'She married a man with pots of money. Our engagement party was a Carnival event, with everyone dressed up to look like somebody they weren't-which is ironic, if you think of it.'
'Do you still mind about her?'
He shrugged. 'It's so far away that I can't remember what it felt like to love her. I was another person. You know that feeling.'
She knew it well. Wisdom told her to drop the subject now, but for some reason she couldn't let it go.
'Piero told me how she came down the grand staircase, looking wonderful, and you stood there-'
'Probably with a fatuous expression on my face,' he said. 'I should have seen then that it was the staircase and the surroundings, plus the title, that she really wanted. She just had to marry me to get them. When they weren't on offer any more-' He shrugged.
He gave a brief laugh. 'I suppose in my heart I always knew the truth, but I wouldn't let myself believe it. When she dumped me so fast it was a surprise, and yet it wasn't, if you see what I mean.'
She nodded.
'I'd like you to see one of those Carnival parties,' he said.
'Well, maybe I will, if our idea comes off.'
'Oh, suddenly it's our idea?'
'But it's a good idea. Vincenzo, after what happened to you, you seem to have got your life back together, but. actually you're treading water. It's time to go on to the next thing. Get your home back, and as soon as it's even partly habitable, you, Rosa and little Carlo can take up residence.'
'And what about you?'
'I'll be there, not in expensive rooms because we'll need them for paying customers. I'll just have a tiny place, and we'll meet for business discussions.'
'You mean you'll stay a ghost?' he challenged her. 'You came in the night, now you plan to haunt the fringes of my life?'
'Hardly the fringes, since we'll be living under the same roof. It's the best thing for Rosa. I'll be around when she needs me. She and I can see each other every day, but I won't be intrusive. You say I'll be a ghost, but maybe that's right for her. She's at ease with ghosts, haven't you noticed? She knows some of them are friendly.'
'And is that the best we can ever hope for?' he asked in a low voice.
'I don't know. You once said you'd like to turn time back until before we met. If you did that, I'd be wiped out too, wouldn't I?'
'I didn't mean that,' he growled. 'Do you understand your own feelings about everything? I wish I hadn't met you like this. It might have been so different, but who knows where the road leads from here?'
'Some day-'
'Some day-when one of us has turned the other's life upside down.'
'Yes, we can't get past that, can we?' She sighed. 'The rest is a happy dream, and dreams can only last so long.'
'But you know better than anyone how long dreams can last,' he said. 'As long as you have the courage to make them. Let's keep ours while we can, forget reality and think about us. I know, I know-' He silenced her with his fingertips across her lips. 'Who can tell if there'll ever be an "us"? But can't we pretend, just for a little while?'
She tried to murmur, 'Yes,' but he silenced her again, this time with his lips. The touch of them answered all questions. For a few precious moments there was no other reality but the one to be found in his arms.
When he rose and held out his hand to her she went with him, smiling. As they passed through the dark hall-ways he held her close, burying his face against her neck, her hair, telling of his desire in whispered tones that made the hot eagerness spread through her like fire.
'Mummy!'
The sound ripped through the air, piercing them, driving them apart.
'Mummy, Mummy, no!'
It came from behind Rosa's door and it was followed by a long, despairing wail. Julia was through the door in a moment, putting on the light.
Rosa was sitting up, her eyes closed, her arms outstretched as if in a desperate plea, tears pouring down her face, lost in some terrifying nightmare. Julia sat on the bed and pulled her into her arms, hugging her tightly until the little girl awoke.
'There, darling, there, darling.' She was talking English although she didn't know it. She was aware of nothing except the need to soothe and comfort the child.
Rosa was awake now, sobbing violently, clinging onto her. Vincenzo went to Carlo, who'd been roused by the noise, and picked him up. His face was haggard.
At last Rosa's weeping subsided, and she lay with her head on Julia's shoulder, hiccupping slightly. Julia drew back and looked down into the tear-stained face, trying to believe what she had heard. The child's words had been so like that other time. Surely it wasn't possible-?
'What happened?' she asked, remembering to speak in Italian this time. 'Did you have a bad dream?'
'Yes-I think so-it was cold and dark and I was frightened.'
'Can you remember anything else?' she asked, trying not to let her voice shake.
Rosa frowned for a long time, but at last she shook her head.
'It's just dark, and I'm feeling scared and-so lonely and unhappy. It's like-the worst thing in the world is happening, but I don't know what it is.'
'Do you-remember what you called out?'
'I don't think I said anything. I just screamed and screamed.'
She searched Julia's face in sudden anxiety. 'Did I say anything?'
'No,' Vincenzo said in a tense voice. 'You didn't. You just made a lot of noise and scared us both to death, you little rascal.'
His voice had become teasing, telling her everything was all right, warning Julia to probe no further.
The warning was needless. Not for the world would she have pushed her child faster than she was ready to go. Tonight she'd been shown a ray of hope, and she would live on that.
'Do you want some hot milk?' he asked.
Rosa nodded contentedly, resting her head against Julia again.
'Can you get it, please, Uncle Vincenzo? I want Julia to stay.'
He laid Carlo back in his cot and went out to the kitchen.
'Do you get nightmares often?' Julia asked gently.
'Sometimes. Since my parents died. But they're all confused and muddled up and afterwards I can never tell what they were about…'
Her voice trailed off and after a moment Julia realised that she had gone to sleep again, contented now. She sat stroking the tousled hair, brooding over her child with fierce, protective joy.
After a while she laid her down, and Rosa half opened her eyes, whispering, 'Is Carlo holding Danny?'
'No, he's on the floor.'
'Can I have him?'
Julia picked up the shabby old rabbit and tucked Rosa's arms around him. The child gave a small grunt of pleasure, and was asleep instantly.
Julia slipped to her knees beside the bed and knelt there, holding one of Rosa's hands, watching her with loving eyes that missed nothing.
Vincenzo, coming in a moment later, found them like that, and went silently away without being observed.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Gemma returned next morning, and Vincenzo walked home with Julia. Rosa would have come with them, but Vincenzo gently discouraged her. This was their first chance for a private conversation since the events of the night before.
She had remained with Rosa a long time, emerging to find that Vincenzo had gone to his room. That had been a kind of relief. What would they have said to each other?
Now they walked in silence until Julia said, 'I feel as if I'd got to know Bianca, with Rosa's help. I'm glad. She's real now. And I have to deal with her.'
'Deal with her? How?'
'By accepting her. I suppose I had some idea of driving her out because she was usurping my place, but I can't do that. There has to be room for all of us. Rosa will only turn to me if she can bring Bianca with her.'
'Does that make you hate my sister?' Vincenzo asked in a low voice.
'No, I'm grateful to her. She did me no wrong. She looked after my child, and made her happy. Rosa says that Bianca actually defended me when her father tried to wipe me out. She wouldn't let him do it.'