“I know.”
His gaze cut to mine. “Do you?”
“I could’ve used that kind of information as a bargaining tool.”
“Would you have?”
I watched Ash as he spoke to Saion and Rhahar, the breeze stirring his hair. “Depends.”
Elias followed my gaze. “You’d do anything for him.”
“I would.”
“He’s a lucky man, then, to have even a day of such devotion.” A brief smile appeared. “And I have a feeling I’ll be a dead man if he catches me talking to you.”
My lips quirked. “You’ll be fine. Attes? Probably a different story.”
Elias chuckled. “Attes does have a way of inciting that response in others.” His eyes narrowed. “I think someone wishes to speak with you.”
I followed his gaze, finding Rhain striding toward us.
“Excuse me.” Elias bowed.
I nibbled on the inside of my lip when Elias departed, only to be quickly intercepted by Kars, then shifted my focus to Rhain.
He stopped about a foot from me. “I’d ask how you’re feeling, but…”
“Yeah,” I murmured. “Thank you for not asking.”
“And forcing you to lie?”
I nodded, now the one shifting uncomfortably from foot to foot. “Oh.” I reached up, unclasping Aios’s necklace. I offered it to him. “Can you give this back to Aios? Or give it to Bele?”
Rhain stared at the silver chain. “You should be the one returning it to her.” He took the chain.
“I would like to,” I told him, glancing down at the cracked marble floor. “By the way, that’s a nifty talent you have. Communicating telepathically.”
The apples of his cheeks matched his hair. “Yeah, it’s not something I advertise. I’m not even as good at it as Kolis believes.”
I doubted that. “I’m sorry about your father and brother.”
Squinting, he nodded. His chest rose. “I wanted…I wanted to thank you for—”
“You don’t have to.”
“But I do.” His golden-brown eyes met mine. “You didn’t have to intervene to save me. You didn’t have to do anything. Yet, you did.”
I folded an arm over my waist. “I only did what anyone else would have.”
“I don’t think that’s true, Seraphena.” He stepped in closer. “I don’t know what you had to do,” he said, his voice low, “but whatever it was, I will never forget what you sacrificed.”
“It wasn’t…” I closed my eyes, knowing it was unlikely he’d believe me if I said it was nothing. “Thank you for not telling any of them about how you were freed.”
“Of course.” His gaze flickered over me. “But they would not have treated you any differently if they knew. I know they would feel what I do, only regret.”
“Regret?”
Rhain nodded. “For not seeing you as Ector did,” he said, his voice cracking. “He saw you for what you were when you first arrived in the Shadowlands.”
“Someone you didn’t want to stab?” I joked.
His too-solemn stare landed on me. “Someone who has earned our respect and admiration. Especially mine.” He looked away. Ash was heading in our direction. “But he always saw you. Always.”
Ash had.
He always saw me, even when he was angry or disappointed.
“What are you two talking about?” Ash came to my side, and Rhain moved back several feet, followed by the others.
“I was returning Aios’s necklace,” I said, my gaze moving over the faces of those I might’ve become friends with if I had more time and missing the ones not here and those no longer with us.
I wanted to see Reaver’s too-solemn and too-old eyes for such a young boy. His smile. And I wished I could hold Jadis again. Feel her weight on my chest as she slept.
Gods, it was so damn weird.
Because I wasn’t sure I had appreciated that experience as much as I should’ve in the moment. But now? I wished I’d paid more attention. Because I imagined that if I were able to live long enough to have children, that was what it would’ve felt like to hold my own. Feeling their heartbeat against my chest. And knowing that I held my whole damn world in my arms.
I glanced up at Ash. He was looking down at me, and the back of my throat burned with a knot of raw yearning. I’d never really considered children. I hadn’t even liked holding them on the rare occasion I’d been near one. Babes and their tiny hands and fragility terrified me. The idea of children had never been a part of my future. But as my gaze traveled over Ash’s face, I would’ve…I thought I would’ve entertained that with him. He would’ve made an amazing father.
No, I corrected myself with a sharp breath. He will make an amazing father.
The tendrils of eather brightened in his irises. He dipped his head to mine, speaking low. “What’s wrong?”
Everything. “Nothing.”
He ran his hand up my back, slipping it under my hair. “That’s not true.”
I drew back, meeting his stare. “Don’t read my emotions.”
“Don’t lie to me.”
“I’m not.” I totally was.
He arched a brow. “Liessa.”
“Nyktos,” I snapped, and one side of his lips kicked up.
“Are you two fighting already?” Saion asked.
Ash lifted his head. “No.”
“We’re about to,” I muttered at the same time.
“Yeah, they are.” Saion smiled at his cousin. “Told you they wouldn’t make it an hour.”
“Godsdamn it,” Rhahar grumbled.
Saion lifted a hand. “Pay up.”
Rhahar was shaking his head as he reached beneath his armor. “I need to be more cynical.”
I frowned as I glanced between the two. “Did you two…?” My brows shot up as Rhahar retrieved a few coins. “You two had a bet?”
“Yep.” Saion took the coins. “Rhahar believed you two would go all day without getting into it. I said you wouldn’t make it an hour without arguing about something—and that was being generous.”
“Wow,” Rhain murmured.
I turned to Bele.
Her hands flew up. “I had no part in this.” She paused. “But I do agree that Saion was being generous.”
Crossing my arms, I faced Ash. “These are your friends.”
His lips twitched as he eyed them. “Were.”
Rhahar laughed, and Saion made some wisecrack about being friends with a Primal of Death, but I…I could barely catch my breath as I stared up at Ash.
He’d just acknowledged them as friends.
He had never done that before, even going as far as to claim that he had no friends.
This interaction would mean very little to most, but it was huge for him. Ash had been taught that any connection could become a weakness that could be exploited. So, he’d always kept distance between himself and everyone else—everyone except Nektas.
I tilted my head, my gaze locking with the black-and-gray-scaled draken perched on the same cliff he had been on earlier. I could’ve sworn he smiled. It was kind of hard to tell while he was in his draken form, but those crimson eyes looked somber.
Drawing in a short breath, I looked at the crystal-clear blue waters. There was so much I wished I had time for. I would’ve loved to see Ash relax around his friends. Share dinner or drinks with them and discuss something other than war and violence. I would’ve liked to see Nektas’s eyes turn as blue as the sea again, and Aios, Ezra, and Marisol…
I really wished I had a chance to do some real bodily damage to Veses.