A nurse came running. "Can I get you anything, Mr. Cosworth?"
Two things of importance here. First, most people are weird. Even in my pain I felt uncomfortable around them. Ralph told me I'd get used to it. "Didn't you feel weird around Ashnahta when you first met her?" No. No, I didn't. But those nurses and doctors, they all put me on edge. "All docs do that." I don't know. Maybe. Maybe that's it, the fact that they are always...hovering. Watching. There at every second of every day. Only a few days around them and I was already sure I was the alien.
The other thing was the "Mr. Cosworth" business. It took two full days for me to realize they were talking to me when they said it. I'm not a moron, but last names had always been completely unnecessary. Of course I knew my last name was Cosworth. Somewhere. I knew it in the back of my head. But I'd never used it. I'd never been called it. No matter who I was introduced to, whatever tribe, I'd always been Jake. Or Jakey. Like Ralph has always been Ralph, not Mr. Buttrick. I actually did not know that was his last name. It might seem like a silly little thing, but the whole concept of last names felt daunting. Why are there last names? Because there are so many people that it's necessary, that's why. It's not a community of twenty seven, like the ship. It's a population of billions.
I was now one of billions.
I told the nurse I was fine. I could feel my cheeks turn red. She gave me a smile and ignored me, fluffed my pillows and summoned a glass of water for me anyway. "I must say you're starting to look a little better." She had the StarTech patch on her uniform. I hadn't noticed before. I wondered if this is a StarTech facility, or if they just flew these docs and nurses in for us.
"I'm feeling better," I said, hoping she'd stop fiddling with the blankets. "It's okay. I'm fine..."
"Lena," she said. "I've been your nurse for five weeks, but I'm not surprised you don't remember me."
I bolted up in bed, and was instantly sorry. My head started swimming and I got that disconnected feeling again. I told my brain to shut up...it was only a pillow and a few feet of travel. Remarkably, that worked. My brain almost grumbled, but the pain and longing feeling for where I just was stopped. "I've been here for five weeks?"
"Yes. You were out for the first few, but then when you started to come around, you were in so much pain." She lowered her voice and looked to the door, as if she was afraid of getting caught. "We were really worried for awhile."
Five weeks. I was laying here for five weeks. No wonder Ralph was on me to get up and shake it off!
Lena plumped my pillow again and asked if I wanted to lie back down. I shook my head and made to stand. She put her hand on my chest. She was just a short young woman, but I was surprised at her strength. "Oh no, not yet. You've got atrophy. I'll call a walker."
My face burned. A walker? Like I was a baby? She called for the walker, and as soon as she slacked her hand, I pushed off the bed.
...and landed on the floor.
Lena giggled. She had the good sense to look serious when I rolled over to look at her. But she did giggle, and I'll never forget that gut-wrenching embarrassment. "I told you to wait." A bot came in. It was a peculiar contraption with legs and a curved bar at the top. Lena held her hand down to me. "Grab my forearm and hold on." I tried to pull myself up. "No! Let me do the work. Trust me, I'm an expert. Grab and hold and allow me to do the rest." I did and with dizzying speed, I was propped into the walker bot, feeling soft clamps close over my ankles and wrists. "Don't fight it. Just lean back a little and then take steps. It's intuitive."
I didn't understand what she meant by that until I gave it a try. I lifted my leg and moved it forward as if to step, and felt the machine adjust to me. I took one step, then another. "It's like the Trekmen!"
"Trekmen?"
I couldn't explain how happy I felt. It might sound ridiculous, but this was something I knew. This was my first familiar item. "Yes, the Trekmen."
"I don't know what that is."
I was floored. I mean, floored! Was she being serious? Yes, the look on her face said she was. "Wow, really? Uh, okay. Well, see, they are these support bots, a lot like this...well, not at all like this, really, but they feel the same. You use them to explore new terrain."
"New terrain?"
"Yeah. You know, uncharted planets and moons. Asteroids. Places where you don't really know what you're getting into."
Lena's eyes were wide. "Holy...you mean...you really are from the stars, aren't you?"
I frowned. "Of course I'm not. No one can be from a star. They'd burn up before they were born!"
Lena laughed and ran a hand through her hair. "Cosworth. Oh wow. Oh boy. Oh my..."
I heard the bathroom door open and moved as if I was in a Trekman. To my glee, the walker followed and turned almost effortlessly to Ralph.
"Buttrick," Lena whispered. "Oh....my...."
Ralph sighed. "Here we go."
I didn't know what was going on. I turned back to Lena. "What?"
"But it's been...it's...a hundred years?"
"Maybe. I haven't really done the math."
"But you look so young!"
Ralph laughed. "Wormholes, the fountain of youth."
"The girls aren't going to..."
"Hear about this at all," Ralph cut in quickly.
I looked to Ralph, I looked to Lena, I looked to Ralph. It was as if a whole conversation was happening. It was as if they were inspeaking. I opened myself and searched, but they weren't, at least not in any way I could understand.
"Okay," Lena said slowly. "I get it."
"You better," said Ralph, tapping the StarTech badge he wore.
Lena bit her lip and looked quickly to the door. "Can I...can I get either of you anything?"
"My young friend here is going to take a shower. I'd like an official uniform for him."
"Yes, sir."
"And if you could schedule us a little conditioning time in the gym, I'd appreciate it. The sooner he gets out of that Trekmen, the better."
"Walker, sir. We call them walkers."
Ralph winked and gave her a nod. "Very good. Thank you. I appreciate the heads' up. I believe the idea is to, uh, blend."
Lena gave a silly little laugh. "Holy...I mean... Wow. It's really you, isn't it?" She shook her head. "Well, I'll do my best to help with that goal."
"Thank you, Lena." She gave another little nod, then left.
"What was that..."
"Not now." His voice was firm, and I listened. I might not be the best at reading people, but I do know how to tell when someone "means it". He meant it. "Get in the shower. Use the railings."
I showered. I did as I had always done. I got in, held the railings, and spent less than sixty seconds under the water. I was soaped and rinsed and waiting for the water to shut off as it did on the ship. But, it didn't shut off. It was also hot, not lukewarm. And there was loads of it. It poured out of the head in buckets. I stood there for the five luxurious whole minutes, the longest shower of my life, and then a little buzzer went off followed by an automated voice that announced I had only one more minute of water. Six minutes! I stood there and used enough water to account for two months of showers on the ship, all in the span of six minutes.
I waited until the water ended, then got out. A bot was standing ready with a full uniform. I dried off sitting on a toilet, almost completely spent, and got into the uniform. I was very happy to get back into the walker. I left the bathroom in a cloud of steam and started to head back for the bed.
Ralph put down the holocom he was reading and stood up. "This way."
"But I'm drained."
"And you'll stay drained if you get back in that bed."
I would have stomped my foot if it wasn't clamped into the walker. I started to protest, but the look on Ralph's face told me that would not be allowed. I followed him out the door, letting the walker take even more of my weight with every step.
Gravity sucks.
Okay, I suppose it's not all bad. Without it things would be flying all over the place. Even our ship had gravity. I should say, the amount of gravity on Utopia sucked. It seemed very excessive to me. Every step took ten times the amount of effort as it ever had for me. Every push on the weight bar was like trying to move a mountain. There is no logical reason to exist with that much gravity. Ralph can't even explain it. He laughed every time I asked and just told me "that's just how it is". And I was supposed to get ready to handle even more. "Don't worry, kid. We'll get you conditioned here and then when you hit home you'll be able to adjust just fine. It's this first step that's the hardest."