"Won't sail 'til you do," Lewrie told him. "I gather that we're to escort your ships to Saint Helena, to help that lone sixty-four-gun that brought you in. Perhaps all the way to the Thames."
"Why, that'd be splendid, Alan!" Burgess cried. "Then, with any luck at all, you could even coach me all the way to Anglesgreen!"
"Haven't been home myself in quite a while, aye," Lewrie said.
Hang it, might as well broach the subject myself, he thought.
"Not been exactly welcome round the homeplace, actually," Alan added. "Bit of a dither…?"
"Oh, that," Burgess deprecated with a snort as their first wine arrived. "Women simply won't understand the realities, Alan, old son," Burgess scoffed with a worldly-wise air that he'd not had before he'd headed for India. "Caroline's written me all about it, several times, as has Governour. He's quite wroth with you, though before he wedded Millicent, Governour was quite the Buck-of-The-First-Head when we were back in the Carolinas. Tell me, has he really gotten as stout as they say? Mother was concerned for his health, in her letters."
"A proper John Bull stoutness," Lewrie replied, chuckling.
"Comes of good living, and living under Millicent's thumb, I'd expect," Burgess said with a frown. "Quite good wine, this. In India, we came to like Cape wines. Their reds don't travel well, but whites keep main-well. Well, Governour… as the eldest, he always did see himself the arbiter of just about everything."
"Threatened to shoot, or horsewhip, me," Lewrie admitted.
"What a fatuous arse!" Burgess exclaimed. "Just 'cause he can't caterwaul or take a mistress, now he's a down on you. Most-like will take me to task, does he ever learn of my bibikhana."
As a Major in the East India Company Army, Burgess would have lived in a private bungalow, apart from the ensigns, lieutenants, and captains who would share quarters off the collegial mess building for his regiment's officers, nearly as grand as a Colonel. And a man with private quarters had to have his own cook, manservant, butler, cleaning maids, punkah boy to keep the fans or suspended mats swinging for cool air, and no one would think a thing wrong of him did he furnish a women's quarters out back, where he could keep a brace of fetching bibis to ease a man's essential needs, without running the risk of a brothel or street prostitute in such a disease-ridden country.
"Impressive, were they?" Lewrie asked with a grin.
"Only the two, but yes, Alan." Burgess beamed back with a wink. "Most delightful. Now, most English ladies who come out to India see that their husbands have needs, and when in the field, are presented with opportunities galore. From what Caroline wrote me, I don't think you ever actually dallied with any wench when you were home}"
"No, I didn't," Lewrie quickly said, immensely pleased that his brother-in-law was being so sane and reasonable about it. "Well… I did spend some time at Sheerness with, ah…"
"The Greek widow, yes," Burgess supplied with another wink and a snicker as the waiter approached their table. "Other than her…"
" 'Twas all far from home, Burge," Lewrie swore. "With bloody years, and thousands of miles, between homecomings."
"And, you were always careful," Burgess blithely assumed. "Ah! Satays and boboties, ye say? Like Hindoo cooking? Splendid. I will essay the 'country captain,' and be sure to set out a pot of chautney."
"I'll have the Cape salmon," Lewrie decided, looking over their chalked menu slate. "Salad, egg-drop soup, and let us share a platter of eland strips in the plum sauce between us, first off. Fresh-sliced, is it, or are they soaked biltong} Fresh is best, thankee, and a glass of your best burgundy each with it."
"Biltong?"
"What you'd call jerky," Lewrie explained. "My cats adore it. I have nigh three hundredweight in stores for 'em."
"Oh, you and your cats!" Burgess laughed. "I'll see your eland, and raise you the fresh lobster remoulade, and make it a bottle of the burgundy… my treat, after all, and we might as well make a feast of it whilst we may. Ship victuals are passing-fair, but…! God, your cats. Two of 'em, now? I recall that hulking old ram-cat of yours you left with Caroline when we sailed for India. William Pitt, wasn't it? Didn't take to me, I'll tell you, though he adored Caroline."
"They're good company at sea," Lewrie told him as their waiter topped up their glasses before heading off for the kitchens. "So, you became a 'chicken nabob] Burge? Lashings of a rajah'% loot}"
"Loot," itself, was a Hindi word.
"I've come away with better than sixty thousand, Alan!" Burgess imparted in a careful, but gleeful, whisper cross the table. "Note-of-hand drawn on Army agents, some in rouleaus of guineas for easy access, and some jewelry I scooped up when we broke into rebel rajahs 'palaces, to boot. Haven't even had them assayed, yet, and still have no idea of their value. Emeralds and rubies, big as pigeons' eggs, nigh a pound of strung pearls and such…"
"Good Lord, you fortunate young dog!" Lewrie congratulated with a hoisted glass. "And, you're looking to buy yourself a British Army commission? Why not a whole regiment while you're at it?"
"Oh, I'll end with a regiment of mine own," Burgess casually rejoined. "Do I not make brigadier, I'd be more than happy commanding a regiment of regulars. This will be a long war, Alan, longer than any of us expect, and sooner or later, we must beard the Frogs on their own ground. A naval blockade won't defeat them, begging your salty pardon. Have to kick them in the teeth, make them howl in anguish, and parade down the streets of Paris before they cry 'Uncle.'
"I expect to find an opening as a Major, at the least," Burgess boasted, "even are 'John Company' officers sneered at by the loftier sorts round Horse Guards. 'Tis not so much my experience, which has to be much greater than theirs, but the money I can bid for my 'colours,' after all. Is there need for a Lieutenant-Colonel in a middling regiment, well, I could afford that, too. Then, with what I've learned of real soldiering, not 'square-bashing' and Church Parades, I could turn that middling regiment into one of the finest in the Army. You watch and see if I don't… just like you expect to turn any new ship you're given into the best, as well!"
Lewrie could not remember Burgess being so confident, or so loquacious, but he thought it a grand improvement on the boy he'd known.
"After a proper spell of leave, o' course," Lewrie chuckled. "A quick run through civilised Society, at least."
"Aye, that, too," Burgess agreed. "And, perhaps marry."
"Well… certainly," Lewrie said, surprised.
"D'ye know the old Army saying?" Burgess asked with a puckish expression. "Might be King's Regulations, for all I know… ensigns or cornets must not marry… captains may marry… majors should marry, and colonels absolutely must wed! A good woman, with the proper taste and manners, sets the right tone in the mess. Seen it, when it's good. And, seen the results when the Colonel's wife wasn't up to snuff."
"The adorable Miss Brothers, perhaps?" Lewrie japingly hinted.
"Oh, Lord!" Burgess exclaimed, all but writhing in his chair.