I had moved deep into the Himalayan woods seeking even more intense solitude. A few villagers had come all the way to see me on the last day of my meditation in the woods. When I emerged from my hut seven months later, they were startled.
They thought a very weak and frail sadhu would come out from the hut for I’d lived on very little for more than seven months in extreme conditions. Sometimes, I would step out in the dead of the night and eat snow.
I had not seen my own face for months. Looking in a tiny mirror, I used to put the tilaka on my forehead once in 24 hours after bathing with icy-cold water. That mirror was too small to render a reflection of my entire face. I didn’t know how I had looked. I knew I had lost weight but I didn’t feel a lack of energy.
They were startled because there was not even the slightest sign of physical weakness or any fatigue at all. For a moment, even I was surprised to look at my own face, the light in my own eyes, only momentarily though. For, I knew that my soul, free from all ties of relationships, religion and the world, was soaring high in the infinite universe of bliss. My source of energy was no longer the food I consumed but the thoughts I thought. And, I didn’t think of anything. I’d been thoughtless for a long time now. Any thoughts I had were only of God or love.
What happens when you churn milk? It turns into butter and once done, it never goes back to being milk. If milk can stay for a few days before going sour, butter can stay fresh for a couple of weeks. If you heat up butter it becomes ghee, and ghee can remain unaffected for years. No matter how you treat it, it can never become butter or milk again.
The final state of bliss is akin to becoming ghee from milk – it’s irreversible.
I had never wanted to come down from the Himalayas. That extraordinary bliss was beyond what I can ever explain. Hundreds of times I had heard the unstruck sound in my heart. Countless times, I had felt going out of my body to be wherever I wanted to be. On numerous occasions, I heard the most beautiful sounds, had the most magnificent visions. My world was complete. There was no need or the urge to come back. On the contrary, I wanted to drop my body.
But realization changes in you something irrevocably. You no longer just think about yourself. Even if you have no responsibilities or family, you can’t just do whatever makes you happy. Somewhere, you recognize that you’ve been blessed in the most potent manner and that it is your duty to share your bliss with those who seek. No matter how much you may want to disregard, you feel obliged to live for the world around you. Like a cow finds joy in feeding its calf, you find your joy in serving the humanity. No matter how the world treats you, you never stop being compassionate. It happens naturally, that you end up putting others’ interests before your own. In your selfless conduct you discover your greatest happiness.
Something miraculous happens to such a selfless person. The forces of universe sit by your feet waiting for your command. You can’t be selfless unless you start to see everyone as part of you and you as part of everyone else. Until you gain an insight into that oneness, you treat yourself differently from others. But, once you gain an experiential understanding (not merely an intellectual) into the true nature of your mind and everything around you, an ever brimming compassion arises naturally for all sentient beings.
Any attainment is worthless if it doesn’t help our world move forward. Any meditation is pointless if it doesn’t expand your consciousness, if it doesn’t amplify your existence and bring in you compassion, positivity and love. That’s what meditation is about. This has been my journey. Go, embark on yours.
Notes
Srila Prabhupada, trans., Srimad Bhagavad Gita (Tokyo: The Bhaktivedanta Book Trust, 1972), 6.46.
I’ve given a contextual translation of the quartet: umā kahaūm̐ maiṃ anubhava apanā, sata hari bhajana jagata saba sapanā. Goswami Tulasidasa, Ramcharitmanas, (Gita Press, Gorakhpur, 1999), Aranya Kanda, 38.3.
Srila Prabhupada, trans., Srimad Bhagavad Gita (Tokyo: The Bhaktivedanta Book Trust, 1972), 6.20–23.5.
Srimad Bhagavad Gita, 6.33–634. My own translation.
Alex Anatole, The Essence of Tao, (Massachusetts, Xlibris Corporation, 2009)
John P. Keenan, Buddhist Sutras (California, Numata Center for Buddhist Translation and Research, 2000) Saṃdhinirmocana Sūtra, 6.702b.
Ken Mcleod, trans., Pith Instructions on Mahamudra. Online: naturalawareness.net/ganges.html. Last accessed: Aug 21, 2016.
Bahadur Shah Zafar. Online: kavitakosh.org/kk/nutf_Gf2L+_2}_lbNf_d]/f_p1O]_bfk/_d]+_/_Hfkm/
Srimad Bhagavad Gita, 16.22. My own translation.
Max F. Muller, trans., The Dhammapada: A Collection of Verses Being One of the Canonical Books of the Buddhists (Low Price Publications, 2006), 1–2.
Patanjali, Yoga Sutras, 2.12. My own translation.
ibid, 1.11. My own translation.
Srimad Bhagavad Gita, 6.17. My own translation.
ibid, 6.19. My own translation.
Paraphrased from Ajahn Brahm, Don’t Worry, Be Grumpy (Massachusetts, Wisdom Publications, 2014) 1.
Srimad Bhagavad Gita, 6.20–21. My own translation.
ibid, 6.25. My own translation.
ibid, 6.26. My own translation.
ibid, 6.13. My own translation.
ibid, 6.12. My own translation.
ibid, 18.73–74. My own translation.
Lobsang P. Lhalungpa, Dakpo Tashi Namgyal, Mahamudra: The Moonlight – Quintessence of Mind and Meditation (Massachusetts, Wisdom Publications, 2006), 1.25f.
Thanissaro Bhikku, trans., Right Mindfulness – Access to Insight. Online: accesstoinsight.org/lib/authors/thanissaro/rightmindfulness.pdf. 47.35, 36.7 Last accessed: 21 Aug, 2016.
Patanjali, Yoga Sutras, 3.2–5. My own translation.
Srimad Bhagavad Gita, 6.20. My own translation.
Lobsang P. Lhalungpa, Dakpo Tashi Namgyal, Mahamudra: The Moonlight – Quintessence of Mind and Meditation (Massachusetts, Wisdom Publications, 2006), 3.149b.
Vijñāna Bhairava Tantra. 100, 104. My own translation.
Avadhuta Gita, 1.25. My own translation.
Srimad Bhagavad Gita, 6.5–6. My own translation.
Thich Naht Hanh, Old Path White Clouds: Walking in the Footsteps of the Buddha, (California, Parallax Press, 1987), Chapter 19.
Srimad Bhagavad Gita, 6.29. My own translation.
Rumi, Maria Georgala, trans., The Spirit of the Month: Twelve Stairs to Heaven. (ebook, amazon.com).
The Whirling Dervishes of Rumi. Online: http://www.whirlingdervishes.org/whirlingdervishes.htm. Last accessed: 21 Aug, 2016.