Reilly got up and, with his knife still drawn, walked toward Caleb, who still stood leaning against the ugly yellow wall.
“Kill me! Just fucking kill me, motherfucker!” Caleb roared.
Reilly came closer and held his knife up in the air. His horrible bloodstained grin emphasized the horror of his intentions. The malice with which John C. Reilly moved through this world.
Then Jane’s powerful voice sounded through the streets.
“GET OOOUUUUTTTTTTT!!!”
Her voice reached from the western border all the way to the east of Brettville. It shook the pines and blew John C. Reilly off his feet. As the ginger bastard landed on the sidewalk he vanished.
It was then that the burning sensation in Caleb’s head died down. He closed his eyes in a desperate attempt to get rid of the dizziness that plagued him.
When Caleb opened his eyes again he found Jane standing next to him. She wasn’t on the sidewalk. Her throat hadn’t been cut. She was alright. She was safe.
There was no Reilly. There were no people gunned down in the streets by the M240. There were only the people staring at him, wondering why he had screamed so loudly. Wondering why he wanted to die so badly.
Caleb felt Jane’s hand on his. He looked at her and found the dark gaze of her eyes easing his mind. No, easing his very soul.
“Was it all in my head?” Caleb asked.
Jane nodded. “It’s okay now, Caleb. You’re back with us. I’m taking you to the hotel.”
No longer dizzy, Caleb stepped away from the yellow wall and, guided by Jane’s hand in his, he followed her back to the hotel. He would have followed her anywhere.
Caleb felt worthless as he fell back into the cozy mattress. He felt the bed’s warm embrace easing its way into his neck, relieving him from the headache that lingered.
He could hear Jane close the curtains for him, leaving him to rest in a shady darkness. Caleb wasn’t sure if he wanted to lie down in a dark room, but he felt that he couldn’t complain.
She was his client. It was his job to take care of her, not the other way around. Yet here he was, struck down by a mere illusion, with the young woman tending to him.
A sudden hot flash rushed through his body, causing sweat to drip from his forehead and well up underneath his armpits. It felt as if his blood was boiling and it became hard for him to breathe.
Without a second thought he yanked off his shirt and tossed it next to the bed. He wanted air to touch his skin. Fresh air, stale air. It didn’t matter as long as it was something, anything, that would cool him down.
“I’ll get you some water,” Jane’s gentle voice informed him.
Caleb heard the door open and close and knew he was now alone in his hotel room. Alone in the darkness of the drawn curtains. Alone with the shadows that were thrown upon the walls, looming over him as he lay on his bed.
Somebody was taking care of him, as if he was a little boy staying home from school with the flu. It wasn’t supposed to be this way. He was supposed to be the strong one. He was supposed to take care of Jane, not the other way around. His contract demanded it.
The door to his room opened again and closed not much later. Caleb recognized the footsteps walking around as belonging to Jane.
“Got you some water. Can you sit?”
With a groan Caleb pushed himself up and leaned his back against his pillow. As he did so the fat on his belly piled up and his man boobs drew downward. He was immediately embarrassed and regretted taking his shirt off.
Jane said nothing about his body. She just handed him the water and watched as he drank like a thirsty dog after a day of hunting.
Then she sat down on the edge of his bed and pointed at his chest. “You have an interesting tattoo.”
Caleb knew she referred to the outline of the rose he had on his chest. It covered the skin on top of his heart and he had gotten it after his mother’s death. The tattoo artist wanted to color it but Caleb had told him not to. His body was the canvas; his skin color was meaning enough.
It was his black rose. Covering his heart, where all feelings had died.
“Thanks,” Caleb said. “Got it years ago.”
Jane gave him a careful smile. “Black rose.”
Caleb tried not to look at her smile. Tried to avoid her dark gaze that had earlier stared into his soul. He wondered what she had found there.
Jane said, “We have to start being honest with each other. I thought that maybe I could get through this without telling you more. Given what just happened, I can’t allow myself to believe that anymore. And I… I don’t want to put you in any danger.
“Because you are in danger. We’re all in danger. Everybody in this town. It’s very strong and it’s very angry and I think it is very old and experienced. Good at what it does.”
Caleb caught her stare and answered it. For a moment they were both silent as they looked for answers in each other’s eyes that might not exist there.
“It’s supposed to be my job to protect you. Not the other way around,” he said.
“And you will. When it’s time. I brought you here for something that I think will happen down the line.”
“You need to start talking to me, then.”
Their eyes stayed locked and Caleb noticed a fear in Jane’s dark gaze that had previously remained hidden. Now, though, in the intimacy of their faces so close together, she allowed him to see it.
She told him, “It’s scary for me to tell you everything. You may want to leave because you won’t understand, or because I’ll scare you.”
“We came to an agreement. I am not leaving, but I do need to understand what’s going on.”
“I will scare you,” Jane said as she studied him. “You won’t understand at first.”
Caleb leaned back slightly against his big, soft pillow. Its comfort stood in stark contrast with the mood that built up in the room.
His life had been a collection of scary and uncomfortable things. Things he could barely understand and that went over his head, making choices for him he had no say in. What was a little more fear in the grand scheme of things? A little extra ignorance?
“I want to know anyway. Tell me everything you have to say.”
Caleb watched as Jane closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She was clearly preparing herself for something that she dreaded doing. As if whatever came next had the potential to expand her reality in ways that were dangerous and forbidden.
She was going to have to let him in. Into her world. Into her past? Into her future? Caleb saw that it terrified her.
Courage was a burden reserved for those that were terrified and had something to lose. Caleb knew this was the cruel reality of true nobility. It wasn’t big money; it wasn’t jumping from an airplane or diving with sharks. Courage, true courage, came always from the smallest person in the room that stared down the biggest threat. Not because they wanted to, but because they had to. Because turning back, running, hiding, were things brave people just didn’t do.
Caleb had lost his courage in Iraq. It had abandoned him and he had never gotten it back. Not really. He could still fight and struggle, but his heart was gone. It had been stolen from him by the ginger bastard that haunted his dreams.
Jane still had her bravery. And when she placed her hand on his forehead to show Caleb things he never thought were possible, she gave some of it to him.
JANE ELRING – PART 2
(March 12, 2006)
Dr. Alexander Greer stood on the stage of his private lecture hall. Even though the room lay three levels underground, the lighting was excellent and fresh air came through the ducts. All in all, Dr. Greer felt, the guests to his laboratory would be comfortable.