So wise. Loretta could just imagine what Zara would be like as a teenager. She would know everything-or at least, she would believe she did.
“I know it’s tough sometimes, being without a dad. But I can’t just go marrying a guy because it would make our lives more convenient.”
“But you could hook up with him.”
Oh, Lord, where did she pick up these phrases? “You mean date him?”
“Date, hang out, you know. Kiki Madison doesn’t have a dad, but her mom has a boyfriend and he’s really cool. He takes her to the movies sometimes, just her and him. That’s almost like having a dad.”
Loretta felt as if her heart were getting kicked repeatedly by a mule. She’d had no idea Zara was harboring these longings for a father figure, or that she felt isolated because she didn’t have a dad. She’d thought Zara coped beautifully with the sad facts of her biological father. She seemed like such a strong little girl. But appearances could be deceiving.
Such as all Zara’s friends thinking Loretta preferred women. Was that the impression she gave people? That she was some sort of man-hater, or antisocial?
It was tempting to tell Zara that yes, she would hang out with Luc. Luc seemed to be hinting that he wanted some kind of relationship with her. That would make Zara happy, at least for a while.
But Zara’s fantasies would only build from there. She would start seeing Luc as a father figure and hang her hopes for a happy family on him. And when it didn’t work out, she would be crushed.
“Luc is a good man,” Loretta said again. “And he likes you very much. But I’m not sure how he’d feel knowing we’re talking about him as husband and father material. He might be the kind of man who shies away from settling down.”
“You mean like my real dad,” Zara said dejectedly.
“Well, yeah.”
Suddenly Zara brightened. “Want me to ask him?”
Loretta gasped. “No, honey, I don’t think that would be a good idea. Please try to understand. Just because Luc is nice and we like each other doesn’t mean we would be compatible…hooking up.”
“But you could try,” Zara said in small voice.
“I don’t think that’s going to happen,” Loretta made herself say. A few minutes ago, she’d been tempted to dip her toe into that murky relationship pool. But she couldn’t let Zara get her hopes up when there was so little chance of anything working out in the long term. “But Granddaddy is a pretty darn good substitute. He was a great dad to me when I was growing up. I bet he would be thrilled to go on that Girl Explorer hike with you.”
Zara brightened slightly. “Yeah, he’s fun. Remember when I took him to show-and-tell and he brought honeycomb for the whole class?”
“He did that for me when I was your age, too.” Sometimes Loretta forgot to be grateful for her parents. But Zara was right. A grandfather was fun, but it wasn’t the same as a real dad.
“SO, YOU BROKE your promise.”
Luc and Doc were sitting on one of the B and B’s upper verandas. The cabin had four porches, perfect for sitting in the evening to catch a cool breeze or watch the sunset.
One of the things Luc had learned since moving to Indigo was how to relax and live in the moment. Before, he’d always been living on the edge-dreaming and scheming about his next move, never satisfied with where he was.
But here in this peaceful place, looking out across an expanse of lawn still green despite autumn’s arrival, and the slow-moving Bayou Teche, it was hard not to relax.
Luc had confessed to Doc what had happened between himself and Loretta. He needed advice. The woman had turned him inside out.
Doc tamped down his pipe and lit it, but he didn’t take a draw. Instead, he just enjoyed a quick whiff of the aromatic smoke before it fizzled and went out. He’d quit smoking years ago, but he still liked everything that went with smoking-the feel of the pipe, the smell of the tobacco, the way a match flared to life.
“I confess, I’m not a strong man. She had her hands all over me, doctoring my scrapes, and it just…went from there. She didn’t exactly have to be coaxed.”
“I guess I saw this one coming, despite my warnings,” Doc said, shaking his head. “My question now is, what do you plan to do about it?”
“I don’t want to just pretend it didn’t happen, that’s for sure.” But apparently Loretta did. She’d been coolly professional in her attitude to him the last couple of mornings as she’d delivered his orders of baked goods, and she hadn’t included any bonus muffins just for him, as she had before. She’d made sure Zara was with her so Luc couldn’t talk about anything personal. And she’d been screening her calls.
“Doc, you were all worried I would use Loretta and then toss her aside. But did you ever expect her to do that to me?”
Doc gasped with mock indignation. “How dare she? Now your reputation will be ruined.”
“I’m serious. She won’t give me the time of day.”
Doc sobered when he realized Luc was truly pained by the mess he’d created with Loretta. “Playing hard to get, maybe?”
“I don’t think so. I think maybe she regrets what we did and wants to forget about it. And I don’t.”
“Maybe she’s dumping you before you have the chance to dump her. Some gals don’t want to be the one left behind.”
“I had no intention of dumping her.”
“Well, what are your intentions?”
Luc had been thinking about what he wanted between Loretta and him ever since they’d made love. But he was no closer to an answer. “I want to be with her. For as long as it lasts.”
Doc shook his head. “That won’t work with her.”
“So I’m supposed to ask her to marry me? Why is it that guys are supposed to know exactly what they want from the very beginning of a relationship? Don’t we get a chance to try things on for size?”
Doc chuckled at that. “A try-it-before-you-buy-it, break-in period. A money-back guarantee.”
“No! You’re being deliberately obtuse. I’m not crazy here. I don’t want to take advantage of Loretta, I want to date her.”
“And sleep with her.”
“That’s generally what happens when men and women date, yeah. Maybe in your day, you’d take a girl for a buggy ride and you’d be engaged, but it’s a little different now.”
Doc laughed again. “We had cars. I’m not that old. But actually, we took girls for boat rides. Nothing like seeing an alligator to get a girl in a romantic mood. Did I hear you were looking for a boat?”
How did Doc know that? “I found one in St. Martinville. A sweet little pontoon boat with a canopy. Grand-mère already okayed it.” Was that how he knew? Celeste?
His grandmother also had an uncanny way of knowing everything Luc was up to. Were Celeste and Doc sharing information? Interesting.
They didn’t talk anymore about Loretta. Luc figured Doc had no more idea what to do about her than he did. But Doc hadn’t told him to keep away from her, which Luc saw as an encouraging sign. Maybe he thought Luc was worthy of Loretta after all.
Not that Doc’s approval helped Luc a whole helluva lot. He was just going to have to catch Loretta alone and pin her down. Pin her down to that feather bed of hers and make love to her until she saw reason.
CHAPTER EIGHT
LORETTA WAS ASHAMED of herself, truly she was. She knew she wasn’t handling this thing with Luc well at all. In fact, she was acting like a first-class bitch. But when it came to questions of her child’s welfare, everything else took a backseat, including her love life.
She simply couldn’t have Zara building elaborate fairy-tale fantasies about weddings and daddies starring Loretta and Luc. But she hadn’t figured out how in the world to explain this to the man in question. He would think she was crazy to even bring up the subject of marriage when they’d never been out on a date.