His eyes glazed over, drifting off to some faraway place in mind, exposing a vein of adversity that came with fame and fortune. A ping of empathy knocked at the door to her heart. Living in the public eye undoubtedly came with its own breed of difficulties.
“God, the way he describes it…total privacy, no media, no TV, no internet, no interruptions. Just nature at its finest…” Muscles near his eyes relaxed, softening the fine wrinkles. “And a woman he loves more than life by his side. Sounds like heaven. They love it.”
His words carved through her heart, striking with precision. Her head slowly twisted side-to-side, taking in a full rotation of the vast dreamy piece of real estate before landing on her feet.
Her feet planted on his porch in his private little piece of heaven.
Carrie Ann frowned warily. Suddenly, the dampness saturating the air clung to her skin like a wool blanket on a winter day. He can’t possibly think that…
“Then I ran into Redford one night at dinner. One thing led to another. A month later it was mine.” His tan muscular arms folded across his chest. “I tried to call you, but you didn’t pick up. Or call back.”
“I remember,” she admitted quietly, shifting from one foot to the other. Over the years she’d ignored several calls, expecting to find an intoxicated Summer on the other end of the line. The risk of not being able to turn him down left her far too vulnerable. She didn’t trust herself or him for that matter. “Why did you call me?”
“I was just thinking about you. Wanted to bring you here.”
“Me?”
“Yeah, you.” He seemed shocked by her surprised reaction. “Remember when we drove up to Big Sur for the weekend? We stayed at that great little cabin. The one with the hot springs?”
The skin between her brows pinched into a deep groove. She definitely remembered. Big Sur was only one of many amazing weekend getaways they took, but it was the first time he told her that he loved her. A small smile warmed his face. Summer’s steady relaxed gaze lingered, provoking her responsiveness.
“Maybe you should’ve considered bringing someone else instead of me.”
He moved closer, lowering his face to hers. “Who would you prefer me to bring? Hmm? Tell me, Red. Because that’s not the tune you were singing on the way here.”
Her common sense ignored the double question, yet her knees still wobbled. Tightening the safety net around her heart, she laid on a heavy dose of insinuation and sarcasm, bolstering a rejection. “Oh, I don’t know, Summer. Maybe a real girlfriend! Not one you had to kidnap.”
He recoiled at her harshness, but quickly recovered. “You wanted to be here. And other women all have the same fuckin’ problem, Red.”
“Let me guess. They’re all after your millions?”
“That’s not the problem I’m referring to.”
“Too beautiful? Too thin? Too crazy like that one voodoo chick you dated?” There was no need to go into detail. He knew exactly who she meant.
“None of them are you, Carrie Ann.” His voice was soft and soothing, slipping past her defenses, caressing old wounds hidden deep inside.
Every tiny muscle in her face softened. Heat rose from her heaving chest, striking fire to her cheeks. He inched closer, shifting restlessly, turning her heartbeat unruly. Energy spiked between them. She sensed his need to reach out and touch her, practically feeling his hands ghost over her flesh.
Backing away slowly, she barely twisted her head once, indicating no. Her throat constricted, sealing her words into silence.
“You don’t need to act all tough. It’s me you’re talking to, Carrie Ann. I see right through it. The only reason you’re being so stubborn is because you’re scared.”
“That was a long time ago. You don’t know anything about me anymore.”
“You’re wrong and you know it.” His tone gentled into a rasp. “I bet that if I slip my hand beneath your dress, there’d be clear evidence of your true feelings.”
Carrie Ann’s jaw jutted forward and she seethed through gritted teeth, “I guarantee that if you even try to slip your hand anywhere near my panties…you’ll be crying like baby. And in an immeasurable amount of pain.”
Her agitation only encouraged him. Easy charm clung lazily to his full lips. “Why don’t you try being a little more honest with your feelings, Carrie Ann?”
“Me?” Her screech echoed through the basin, skipping through the range of mountains. “Remind me again. Why did we break up?”
“If I remember correctly, you broke it off with me.”
“Of course that’s how you’d remember it! Typical Summer. Blame it all on me!”
Summer remained eerily calm. His piercing stare never left her face. He’d prepared for this, all of it, and suddenly she found herself at a complete disadvantage.
“You want to know why?” Casting aside all humor, he sobered. “Because I lost my mind after losing football. I drank too much. I was an all-around jerk, Carrie Ann. I’d invested everything into football for my future…our future, and I hated myself for failing. I had no idea how the fuck I was going to give you the life you deserved. I pushed you out. I drove you away when you were trying to be there for me.”
Stunned by his admission, wetness needled the corners of her eyes. “All I wanted was you. I never cared about anything else. The money, the fame, those were things you wanted.”
“Back then…that was easy for you to say. You came from money. I had something to prove.”
“I never asked…”
“You never asked, but your father made it perfectly clear.” His voice refused to waver. Summer’s stare locked on her face. The amber in his eyes turning the color of honey behind his perfectly tan skin. “I lost the most important thing in my life…and it wasn’t football.”
The urgency in his tone, the desperate need for her to understand, disarmed her. Fighting back the urge to immerse herself in his closeness, she pushed back tears. Channeling her defenses, she retorted tersely, “Funny how you seem to forget about me finding your dick shoved into some other chick’s navel.”
“I’m not going to hash over this bullshit with you again, Carrie Ann.”
His brazen attitude seemed designed to perpetuate the assumption they were an item.
“Of course you’re not. Because you’re just as chicken shit now as you were back then! How bout you try the truth for once.”
“I told you the truth a hundred times and you didn’t listen!” A long heavy silence lingered between them. “You want the truth?”
“That would be a nice change.”
“I never lied to you. Ever. I apologized a hundred times for something I had no control over.”
“So, you’re still sticking to the ‘I swear. I woke up with my dick in some chick’s mouth and I thought it was you’ bullshit story?”
“It’s not a story. I did think it was you…for a minute. Until I realized…”
Unraveling at the seams, she unloaded on him, “Go ahead! Say it! This is my favorite fucking part…‘her blowjob just wasn’t as good as yours.’ God, you haven’t changed one bit!”
Her voice shredded, lost to the heartbreak. She turned her back to him, refusing to let him witness the pain, raw and unprotected. His hands came to her shoulders. The pads of his fingers pressed into her flesh, raising the hair on her body to spiky points.
“I realized it wasn’t you, because no other woman can make me feel the way you do. And you’re right…that still hasn’t changed. No one’s even come close.” The heat of his touch coaxed a small gasp from her lungs. “I went to bed alone that night. Yes, I was trashed, but I wasn’t even at the house party that night. You’d just broke things off with me the day before and I’d been drinking with my brother for two days. When his wife found us at the bar, she drove me home and left me on the lawn. The next thing I remember was waking up with…”