‘Good morning. I did not realize you were awake.’
‘I am awake and I want to know what is wrong with you.’
Her heart sank. This was not a good start to the day. ‘What makes you think that something is wrong?’ she hedged.
‘You did not sleep well and when you did, you kept talking.’
Audrey almost flinched. She had been talking in her sleep? For heaven’s sake, she could have said anything. ‘My dreams were certainly troubled,’ she said, forcing a lightness into her tone she did not feel. One could never tell with Millie; she could be completely absorbed in whatever interested her at any given time and therefore oblivious, or she could be extremely perceptive. ‘Did I say anything silly?’
‘I wish you had. It was all mumbles and groans, as if you had a stomach ache.’
‘Perhaps something at dinner disagreed with me,’ Audrey suggested. ‘That rabbit and turnip pie was a little peculiar.’
‘I thought it very tasty,’ Millie returned, although the continuing gleam of speculation in her eyes did not bode well. ‘More likely Lady Allingham gave you the horrors. She certain looked sour enough. Do you know Mr. Kirkwood?’
Drat! Millie had picked up on her peculiar behavior. ‘I met him briefly back in London. In August, I believe,’ she replied airily. ‘Why do you ask?’
‘Because he made you faint.’
Audrey blinked. ‘I… good heavens, Millie, I did not faint because of Kirkwood.’
‘I think you did,’ her sister replied with the implacable tone of one who had examined the evidence and had reached certain conclusions. ‘You looked at him and went white and then you fainted.’
Audrey bit her lip, wondering what to say. She should have thought of something convincing in the event that Millie had noticed something was amiss but her thoughts had been so scrambled since the arrival of Kirkwood that she had not thought to do so. It was so like her youngest sister to have seen what other eyes had missed.
‘It was just a coincidence,’ she said, as firmly as she could manage. I was feeling odd and then Mr. Kirkwood walked in and… and I fainted.’
‘Hmm,’ Millie said, tone noncommittal. ‘You spent a lot of time looking at him last night when he wasn’t looking at you and he did the same thing. Looked at you when you weren’t looking at him, I mean.’
‘Oh?’ Audrey hesitated. This would never do. She needed to come up with a reason for her extraordinary behavior. ‘Well, I suppose it was because I met him in London and… and we did not exactly hit it off. He wanted to know what my intentions were towards his brother.’ It was not a lie, after all. Kirkwood had wanted to know exactly that.
Millie elbowed herself upwards and propped her head in her hand. ‘He didn’t think you would be any good for his brother?’ she demanded, a certain amount of indignation underlying the question.
‘He didn’t say that, exactly,’ Audrey said hastily, knowing full well that Millie might very well speak her mind to Kirkwood if she thought her sister had been in any way insulted. The youngest of the Hathaways was fiercely loyal. Indeed, it was one of her most endearing character traits. ‘No, it was more that he wondered what sort of girl I was. Perfectly understandable I suppose, for one would want to make sure one’s brother or sister was making the right choice before they commit to marriage. Unfortunately, I took offense and we had words. Now, quite naturally, it feels awkward and I daresay he feels it as well, especially as his brother is here.’ She looked at Millie, hoping that no further elaboration would be necessary. One did not confess to an impropriety such as she had committed to one’s youngest sister. And one certainly did not confess that one was ridiculously attracted to the wretched man and wished, most fervently, for that impropriety to happen again!
Millie was obviously considering this new information. ‘I suppose I would want to know something about the man you were marrying. I liked Harry from the outset and Johanna turned out to be quite an excellent addition to the family. But we still have to find the right man for you, do we not? Nobody has been at all suitable so far.’
Audrey blinked, slightly taken aback by this. ‘Indeed? You must be a very harsh judge for I have met some very pleasant gentlemen. I thought,’ she added wryly. ‘that you were not an avid supporter of marriage?’
‘I’m not an avid supporter of marriage for me,’ Millie corrected her. ‘But you want to have children and the like and you’d be awfully good at it. So a husband is necessary, even I can see that.’
Despite herself, Audrey’s lips twitched. ‘Mama would be very reassured to hear you say so. As for a husband for me… well, there is no hurry, after all. I am only just nineteen and not yet on the shelf.’ She had a sudden thought and gave Millie a nervous glance. ‘Please tell me you have not been looking!’
‘Of course I have. Some of the gentlemen that have been courting you are not too bad, I suppose but I can’t say that any of them have been exceptional. Lord Allingham, for example. He was quite nice but I’m glad you didn’t accept his proposal because he was not at all right for you. He was quite dreadfully straight laced, don’t you think? Not at all like his brother.’ Well, Millie certainly had the right of it there. There was nothing in the least bit straight laced about Kirkwood.
‘Some people,’ she said grimly, ‘find straight laced to be a… an admirable quality.’
‘I don’t,’ Millie observed judiciously. ‘For if he is so prissy at three and twenty, what is he going to be like in ten years’ time?’
‘Sometimes you sound as if you are approaching thirty yourself!’
Millie grinned, unrepentant. ‘Now Mr. Kirkwood…’
‘What about him?’ Audrey said warily.
‘I have concluded that Mr. Kirkwood is a bastard and that is the reason he is not welcome in Society.’
‘Millie!’
Her sister raised an eyebrow. ‘So I am wrong?’
‘No! No, you are not wrong but… but it would be better by far if you did not mention it or that word.’
‘Do you mean bast -’
‘Yes!’ Audrey said forcefully. ‘Exactly that.’
‘But I don’t understand,’ Millie protested. ‘He did not seem to mind in the least. In fact, he would have been quite happy to speak of it if you all had not shushed him.’
‘And just as well we did. It is not the best topic for after dinner conversation. Besides, we cannot know how he truly feels about it.’ Audrey paused, wondering what would be a sufficient enough reason to curb her sister’s unruly tongue in case Millie took it into her head to interview him on the subject of his illegitimacy. ‘Only consider, my dear, how uncomfortable it must be for him. Imagine if your positions were reversed. How would you feel if you were not well received because of your birth.’
‘I would not care,’ Millie said immediately. ‘After all, it would not be my fault, but that of my parents. Why should I feel bad for something somebody else did?’
Audrey groaned. ‘What a wretch you are!’
‘You are being too sensitive,’ Millie said, flinging the covers to one side and slipping out of bed. She paused, glancing at Audrey again. That gleam had not died from her eyes, Audrey reflected uneasily. ‘Do you like him?’
‘Who? Mr. Kirkwood?’
‘Of course, Mr. Kirkwood.’
‘I don’t think I like him at all,’ Audrey said, on safer ground now. ‘He can be very abrasive.’ Among all the other things he could be.
‘I think he’s very entertaining. He isn’t stuffy at all and I think he would always tell one the truth.’
‘Oh I daresay. Even if they did not wish to hear it.’
‘Well that isn’t so bad is it? Sometimes the truth isn’t nearly as bad as people think,’ Millie returned, before bending to scramble for her slippers. ‘It is very cold. And I’m starving. Do you think breakfast is ready yet?’