Dare to change. Have the courage to explore. You will find security in how you evolve when you embrace change with an open mind. You will find power in the courage to release yourself from the familiar.
DAY
279
“Dare to be naïve.”
— Buckminster Fuller
Will hated feeling naïve. His fear of not being in-the-know could be traced back to a time when his family moved, and he was suddenly the new kid in school. He didn’t know the routine of his new classroom, and the kids made fun of his ignorance on several occasions before he caught up. It left him with a feeling of inferiority that he secretly vowed he would try his best to avoid for the rest of his life.
Unfortunately, as Will was striving to become an expert in his field, he also ended up losing a very important ingredient to success—his ability to be teachable. Will wanted to know it all, to always have the answer. He continually demonstrated his knowledge and very seldom listened to new opinions. Therefore, Will left no room to grow. He was fearful of showing any ignorance, so he hid his questions and pretended he knew the answers, even when he didn’t.
If Will had had the courage to be naïve, he would have traveled much faster along the road to success. When you are naïve, you are willing to admit you are an empty bucket that is ready to be filled with ideas. It takes courage to drop your ego and dare to be naïve.
Give it a try today. Dare to be naïve. It might feel a little insecure at first, but there will be power behind it, just like there is power behind change. Find out what it’s like to be open to suggestions and to admit you don’t know the answer. Have the courage to discover rather than instruct.
DAY
280
“The best way out is always through.”
— Robert Frost
One final aspect of courage that will be studied in this section has to do with direction. It takes great courage to plow straight through a problem rather than find a way around it. Have you ever thought about that?
Many of us try to go around problems first. For example, you know your spouse is mad at you for some reason, but rather than asking what’s wrong, you avoid them. It would be more courageous to find out from the source what you might have done to upset him or her, and it would probably save a lot of trouble in the future, but very few people take that route first.
Think about the direction you take when faced with an issue. Do you tend to attack it head on, or do you try a dance of avoidance first? Do you prefer detours when you are put in a sticky situation? Pull a couple of instances out of your recent memory and write about how you handled them. In what ways could you have been more courageous in dealing with those situations?
Don’t be afraid to analyze your actions and practice a more courageous response the next time you face a similar situation. Successful people are constantly looking for ways they can improve their actions and live more authentically. Stare directly into the eyes of your problems and practice having the courage to deal with them rather than avoid them. The best way out is always through.
DAY
281
“Listening, not imitation, may be the sincerest form of flattery.”
— Dr. Joyce Brothers
Today your task is to explore how you respond to people around you. Think about how much you learn from the words and actions of others, good and bad. Are you paying attention to what is going on outside of yourself? Do you soak up outside influences, or do you prefer to cast your influence on others?
It’s important to strike a good balance between what you take in and what you give off. Think of yourself as a light bulb. You give off light and heat, but you also need to bring in energy (or inspiration) in order to shine. You do not want to be imprudent about who you imitate. Not everyone is living the kind of life you want to emulate. You also do not need to impose your own criteria for successful living on others. They might have different priorities that don’t necessarily match your own.
Dr. Joyce Brothers brings up an excellent point in the quote above. Listening may be the sincerest form of flattery. If you truly want to give someone respect, listen to them. You can make your own choices later, but it is almost never a bad idea to hear someone out. You may find you disagree with their views. You don’t have to imitate them.
Listen to the people you come in contact with today. Respect their views. Learn from them. It does not mean you have to agree or follow their lead. Practice collecting information and reserve judgment for a later time. “That’s interesting,” is a great phrase to incorporate into your conversation. It does not mean you concur, but it does mean that you heard the other person’s view. Open your ears and close your mouth today.
DAY
282
“Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.”
— Mark Twain
Far too many individuals believe that they must stomp on the heads of their competition in order to achieve success. That is a completely false assumption. People who are truly successful and comfortable in their talents do not belittle others. They lift them up.
There is not a single first-place trophy that will be bestowed upon one individual at the end of this race. The potential number of people who will achieve success in the world is limitless. Every single one of us can finish first. It is critically important to realize that you do not have to push someone else down in order to pull yourself up the ladder.
You are not truly successful if your accomplishments are made to the detriment of someone else. Do you struggle with that concept? Does your competitive side long to beat out the competition? Address your beliefs starting today. Divide a page in your journal into two columns. In the left column, write down the instances when you belittled others. Did you point out a coworker’s mistake without providing a useful alternative? Did you make fun of someone behind their back? Write down every time you remember raising yourself up by putting someone else down. In the right column, put down the times when you lifted someone up. When did you help a friend or encourage a family member? Did you teach anyone a new skill or congratulate them on a job well done? Now, your ongoing task is to increase the right column and decrease the left column.
DAY
283
“Flattery and insults raise the same question: what do you want?”
— Mason Cooley
Cameron thought he had it all figured out. He had a very specific plan to climb the corporate ladder, and he took every opportunity to further his career. Cameron stuck his head in the office of his CEO at quarter to eight and congratulated him profusely on winning a new contract. That accomplished two things in Cameron’s mind. It showed the CEO he had arrived at work fifteen minutes early, and it also laid on a thick coat of flattery that Cameron hoped would benefit him later. At a lunch meeting, Cameron did everything he could to shoot down a new proposal one of his peers presented. He scoffed and raised numerous questions so that the man was unable to complete a sentence and thoroughly explain his ideas. That accomplished another important task in Cameron’s mind—picking off the competition. It was a good day . . . in Cameron’s mind.