— e. e. cummings
Your secret weapon for success is you. No one else has your unique combination of abilities. That means you have talents to share that not one other person on this earth can put out there. You own a monopoly, and it’s inside yourself. You’ve spent some quality time throughout this year discovering your talents, and you will continue to do so throughout your life. Now, here is your battle: you must continue to fight to be nobody but yourself.
The quote above from e.e. cummings points out how easy it is for you to sabotage your dreams by trying to be something you are not. It seems as though this world is doing its best, night and day, to make you into everybody else. Remember that your ultimate strength is your uniqueness. Don’t let anyone try to mold you into something that doesn’t feel like you.
Your assignment today is to write down all of your unique traits. Write about your quirky habits, your endearing behaviors, and your special talents. If you were going to write an ad about yourself, what would it say?
This exercise can be slightly uncomfortable for many people. It’s hard to talk about how great you are. It feels self-centered. Nevertheless, do this exercise. You’re not going to share it with anyone else. It’s a reminder that you are an amazing work of art, and you should be constantly working to utilize your secret weapon—you!
DAY
357
“God has given you one face and you make yourself another.”
— William Shakespeare
Sheila loved women’s magazines. In a way, they gave her an identity. She would buy a handful of them every Friday night and pour over the fashions and the makeup throughout the weekend. Sheila flipped through the glossy pages and plucked her eyebrows to resemble one model, dyed her hair to look like another, and created her wardrobe after all of the latest fashions. If someone asked Sheila what her favorite color was, she would probably consult Vogue before she answered.
What was she doing? Sheila was looking outward to find her inner beauty. It wasn’t necessary. We are all influenced by our surroundings, and that can be a positive thing. However, it is extremely important to discover your unique characteristics from the inside out rather than from the outside in.
What are you doing to stay true to yourself today? Are you constantly trying on the masks of outside influences instead of appreciating the face God has given you, as Shakespeare put it? Remember, you are the secret weapon for success. You can’t let your unique talents emerge if you are constantly covering them up with the status quo.
When you are bombarded with outside influences today—and you will be—think before you act. Are you picking up that new bestselling book just because it’s popular, or are you really interested in the story? Did you choose the shoes you’re wearing today because you like them or because you saw a famous actor wearing them in a magazine? Let your face emerge as a powerful influence today.
DAY
358
“We are so accustomed to disguising ourselves to others that in the end we become disguised to ourselves.”
— François Duc de la Rochefoucauld
Carl was going to do what it took to fit in at his new law firm. One of the partners asked him if he played golf, and he blurted out, “Of course!” Hundreds of dollars in lessons later, he was a passable player. Carl hated the game, but he thought he needed to be out there with the other guys. That wasn’t the only new thing that he adopted. Carl’s wardrobe changed from modest navy suits to Armani designs and flashy cufflinks, he got a Blackberry and a membership to the country club, and finally, he traded in his Honda for a BMW.
Carl caught a glimpse of himself in the hall mirror when he came home one night. Who is that guy? he thought, as he stared at his reflection. Who is that pompous jerk with the slicked-back hair, the man who is living far above his means? Carl stepped closer to the mirror to try to find a hint of his true colors somewhere in the persona he had spent months creating.
What do you do to disguise yourself? Are you good at becoming a chameleon and fitting into almost any situation? Do you tend to adopt the behaviors and attitudes of those around you in order to fit in? Be careful. That’s an easy way to lose yourself. Practice worrying less about how others perceive you and more about honoring your own identity. The right friends, the right job, and even the right significant other will come to you if you don’t disguise yourself. If you reveal who you truly are, you will attract the people who will most complement your life.
DAY
359
“Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one’s definition of your life; define yourself.”
— Harvey Fierstein
Your voice is important.
You are a significant influence on this world.
You are not a victim.
You get to define yourself.
Write each of the four sentences above on a separate piece of paper in your journal, and then fill the rest of the page with your thoughts. Are you defining yourself, or are you letting others do it for you?
If you want to achieve your dreams, you must remember these four messages. They are essential to finding the strength you need to succeed. Take control of your life and your future. Define yourself. It is so exciting to realize that you don’t have to hold back or cover up your true self. Unleash your potential. Don’t let anyone stop you from following your path to success. Find people with common goals and work with them. Help others along the way, but never let someone else tell you who you are or what you are capable of accomplishing. You are the only one who can do that.
Accept nothing less than what you know to be true about yourself and your potential. Don’t worry if others laugh at your dreams. They don’t get to vote on your future. You’re in charge of that. Define yourself today . . . and think big!
DAY
360
“Let the world know you as you are, not as you think you should be, because sooner or later, if you are posing, you will forget the pose, and then where are you?”
— Fanny Brice
Do you feel like an actor pretending to be you in real life? Are you play-acting at one thing, when you know you are something else? It’s stressful to try to imitate all of the right moves and make people believe you are someone you’re not.
Maybe you are pretending to be really knowledgeable about a certain technology at work, but the truth is you have no idea what you’re doing. Unfortunately, it’s only a matter of time before the curtain comes down and that scene is over. What is going to happen when they find out the truth?
Think through your life today. Are there areas where you are posing? Are you pretending to be something you think you should be? As Fanny Brice mentions in the quote above, sooner or later you’re going to forget the pose. Do you really want to go through the embarrassment of admitting you were pretending to be something you’re not? Not only is that dishonest, but it also carries the connotation that you’re ashamed of who you really are. Are you?