“It’s my guest bedroom I need to air. The smell of sex is—”
Alec cut himself off when I jumped at him again; only this time, he had the good sense to cover his ears. The eejit forgot to guard his nipples, though, and I made him pay dearly for that error in judgment. I latched onto them and tweaked them both so hard I knew I’d probably leave bruises. Alec roared, and the kids screamed back at him, thinking he was playing a game. Nico was laughing so hard he had to sit down on the floor, and Kane looked like he had tears in his eyes from laughter. I couldn’t see the sisters, but I heard their wheezing as they laughed.
“Mercy!”
When I let go of Alec this time, he covered his nipples with his hands, bent forward until his forehead touched the table and groaned in pain.
“I think they’re bleeding!” He croaked. “Oh, merciful God, I think you twisted them right off.”
I rolled my eyes.
“You’re like a hobbit on steroids!” he continued. “I never knew you possessed such strength. Christ.”
I began to worry about him then as he did look to be in a lot of pain.
“Let me see—”
“You have done enough damage,” he cut me off before he looked at his brothers. “Lotion. I need lotion for my nipples.”
Nico slapped his hand against his thigh, Kane covered his eyes with his palms as his shoulders shook, and Bronagh and Branna were all but crying with laughter. I stood, placed my hands on my hips, and stared at Alec.
“Let me see.”
With a scowl, he got to his feet, pulled up his top, and my eyes paused on his abs instead of his nipples. Alec was insanely attractive, but I was not attracted to him. I loved him like a brother, but there was no denying that the man had a body and face that would cause both sexes to stop and stare.
“I’m telling Damien that you checked me out,” Alec warned. “Look at you, practically drooling.”
My lips twitched as I stepped closer and peered at his nipples.
“They’re still attached.”
“They’re throbbing,” he grunted. “And not in a good way.”
I lifted my hands and flattened my palms against his nipples, and he hissed.
“If you ever need another job,” he said to me, “you should consider applying to Helga’s house of pain.”
I smiled as I dropped my hands and stared up at him.
“Ye’ll be fine, you big baby.”
“The only way I’ll forgive you is if I get to twist your nipples, too.”
Nico spluttered with laughter. “Damien will murder you.”
Alec grinned. “Worth it.”
“Ye’ll never see me nipples.”
“They’re probably weird looking nipples anyway, so maybe I’m better off.”
When all the excitement and laughter died down, Branna and Bronagh decided to do laps around the back garden in hopes to kick-start Bronagh’s labour. Jax and Georgie went with them while I went into the sitting room with the lads and Locke. He clung to me like a spider monkey, and it amused his father.
“My boys adore you.”
“I know,” I said proudly. “I don’t blame them, though. I’m pretty amazin’.”
The lads snorted.
“Ye’ should go over to Keela,” I said to Alec. “She’s probably gonna try to clean the ceilin’ or somethin’ if you aren’t there to watch ‘er.”
“But she said I could come over here.”
“Sayin’ it and meanin’ it are two different things.”
Nico bobbed his head in agreement. “I’ve already covered this in chapter one. Consult your book if you forgot.”
Alec leaned his head back against the sofa.
“I can’t deal with none of your Man Bible preaching today, Dominic. Keela said it was cool to come over here, so I’m staying.”
Nico looked out the sitting room window and froze.
“Bro.”
“No,” Alec said. “I’m staying here.”
“Shut the fuck up and look over at your house.”
To appease him, Alec turned and looked over his shoulder but instantly froze as well. Curiosity got the better of me, so I leaned forward and looked out the window, too. I tensed when I saw a figure standing in the sitting room window of Alec and Keela’s house staring over at the house.
I widened my eyes. “Is that Keela?”
“If it’s not,” Alec murmured, “I need to call Ed and Lorraine Warren to exorcise my damn house.”
“If ye’ manage to get hold of Ed on the phone, get the number for the ghostbusters next ‘cause he’s been dead for years.”
Alec didn’t look away from Keela, who was still staring over at us.
“Since you find this so funny, Lana, why don’t you go over and see if she is okay?”
“Why?” I grinned at the back of his head. “Are you too scared?”
“Fucking terrified,” he answered.
I laughed, Nico grinned, and Kane shook his head as he took Locke from me.
“These are the rantings of a madman,” I said to Nico. “Right?”
“You can just say Alec. It’s another term for madman.”
I bumped fists with him and chuckled.
“I’m fucking delighted that you’re both finding this funny, but I swear to God that Keela just made the sign of the cross and pointed over at me. What the fuck does that mean?”
“Maybe it means she’s plannin’ on you meetin’ God sooner than you think,” I teased.
“That does it!” Alec announced suddenly and loudly. “I’m not leaving this damn house. Alannah, go over and make sure Keela is okay. And Nico?”
“Yeah?”
“Lock the door behind her.”
I laughed harder than I had in a long time, and I practically skipped out of the house and across the road. When I entered Alec and Keela’s, I walked into the sitting room and said to Keela, “Ye’ have Alec terrified that you’re possessed.”
“I knew I’d scare ‘im by just standin’ ‘ere.”
“Come with me.” I chuckled. “Alec thinks the house needs to be exorcised.”
With a laugh, Keela and I left her house and made our way over to Branna’s.
“All is well,” I announced. “She just wanted to freak the man-child out.”
“I resent that,” Alec said, drawing a grin from me as he focused on Keela. “Why did you say I could come over here if you didn’t really want me to?”
Keela shrugged. “I wanted to see if ye’ could figure it out yourself.”
“Clearly, I can’t.”
“I just find it interestin’ how—”
“Retreat.”
Keela stopped speaking to listen to Nico mutter to Alec.
“What?”
“It’s a trap.”
Alec looked confused. “How?”
“She doesn’t find anything interesting; it’s a trap. She’s closing in on your fuckup.”
“But you said it’s only when she says, ‘I find it funny,’ that it’s a trap.”
“Funny. Interesting. Either word is lethal.”
Alec groaned. “I can’t keep up with all these stupid rules.” He looked at Keela. “I’m so sorry for leaving when you didn’t want me to. I won’t do it again, just please don’t make me spend the next eight hours wondering how I can make it up to you while you ignore me. Please. I can’t deal with it.”
He sounded like he was going to have a nervous breakdown.
“Honey, stop.” Keela frowned. “It’s okay.”
I blinked.
“Son of a bitch,” said Nico. “You just cheated the system.”
“What?” Alec asked.
“You broke down like a bitch … but it worked. She’s not mad at you no more.” Nico shook his head. “Bro, new chapter to The Man Bible.”
That fecking Man Bible.
Alec ignored his brother and focused on Keela.
“I lust you,” he practically growled at her.
Keela grinned. “I lust ye’, too.”
I looked back and forth between them.
“What the hell was that about?”
Keela laughed. “When he is hot for me, his new thing is to tell me he lusts me.”