Lucifer looked down into eyes that were very like Phyllida's but had seen a great deal more. "I can't say."
That was the literal truth.
He turned back to the window. He felt even grimmer than his grim expression showed. "With your permission, I'd like to talk to Phyllida tomorrow morning." He glanced at Sir Jasper, meeting his gaze. "There are a number of matters I'd like to discuss with her, and if I could speak with her privately, I think there are various points we might clarify."
Sir Jasper held his gaze, then turned back to his desk. "Privately, heh? Well, you might be right-not easy to get her to open her budget." He paused, then asked, "Should I mention you'll be dropping by to speak with her?"
Lucifer looked out of the window. "It might be better if my visit came as a surprise."
Chapter 12
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Midnight. Phyllida lay in her bed and listened to the clocks throughout the Grange chime. The last echoes died and left her in silvered darkness.
She'd slept through half the afternoon, then, after dinner, she'd been harried and hounded until, simply to gain some peace, she'd retired early to her room and her bed. She'd slept. Now she was wide awake.
Nothing hurt. The scrape on her calf and the bruise on her arm were distant irritations.
Her thoughts were more tortured.
Being shot at across a field was something she'd been able to push aside-despite the evidence of the horse Lucifer had uncovered, it could still have been a hunter. Being shot at was distant; she hadn't seen her attacker.
At the church, she hadn't seen him, but she'd felt him.
Felt his strength, and known the threat was real.
Fear. She could still taste it at the back of her tongue. She'd never known real fear before-not here in her peaceful, maybe not quite happy but content, existence.
That existence was under threat; she felt it like cold iron at her back. Her life was not something she'd thought of before-she'd taken it for granted. Just like all those around her. How ironic.
She didn't want to die. Especially for no reason. Especially at the hands of some cowardly murderer. Lucifer had been right. The murderer obviously thought she knew more than she did. He was after her in earnest.
Dragging in a breath, she held it, forced the chill from her skin, waited until the shivery tremors had died. She couldn't go on like this-she hated the sense of not being in control, of not being safe. She hated the taste of fear.
So-what to do?
It should have been an easy question; thanks to her promise about Mary Anne's letters, it was anything but. Phyllida lay on her back and stared up at the shadows dancing on her ceiling.
She would bet her best bonnet Lucifer would be back tomorrow morning; this time, he wouldn't let be. He'd insist she tell him all, and if she refused, he would speak to her father. She felt confident in predicting how he would react, certainly in those circumstances where honor and duty ruled. He might be many things, a reprobate, a rake, an elegant charmer of questionable constancy, but at his core he was a gentleman, one of the highest caliber.
It would not be in his lexicon to allow her to endanger herself-that was how he would see it. That, for him, would be the crux of the matter, regardless of how she felt.
After nearly being strangled, she could hardly argue. She would have to tell him all tomorrow. She would tell him about the hat-and then she would have to tell him about the rest, too.
But what of her promise to Mary Anne, her sworn oath that she'd say nothing to anyone about the letters?
What price an oath to a friend?
She'd never imagined facing such a decision. Finding the letters should have been so easy. Even now, if only she could search upstairs at the Manor. She'd been thinking of going one night, when the servants were abed. She knew which room to avoid, but the other rooms… Mary Anne's grandmother's traveling writing desk had to be in one of them. She doubted it had been put in the attic. No-it would be sitting on some chest somewhere, looking dainty and delicate, just waiting for her to retrieve the letters…
Lifting her head, she looked across her room. The moonlight was bright; she could see her dresser clearly, even make out the scrollwork around her mirror's rim.
She pushed up onto her elbows.
Before tomorrow morning dawned and brought Lucifer with it, she had at least four hours of deep night. Time enough to search the first floor rooms at the Manor, find the letters, and return home. And the window in the Manor's dining room still had a loose latch.
She flung aside the covers. If she didn't find the desk tonight, then tomorrow she'd tell Lucifer all and ask for his aid in finding the letters. Despite Mary Anne's and Robert's paranoia, she felt confident that if he bothered to read them at all, the contents of the letters would gain no more than a raised eyebrow from Lucifer; she couldn't imagine him giving the letters to Mr. Crabbs.
But for Mary Anne, and to honor her promise, she'd make one last attempt to find the letters.
Struggling into her clothes, she glanced out at the shifting shadows of the wood. She'd be safe. No one, not even the murderer, would imagine she'd be out tonight.
She was still repeating that thought when she reached the edge of the wood and looked across at the Manor. She'd worked her way farther around the house; across the lawns stood the dining room. To reach the corner window, she'd have to pick her way across the gravel drive.
Steeling herself, she started across, carefully placing each foot before transferring her weight to it. Luckily, her enforced sleep and the brisk walk through the wood had left her physically alert. She reached the beds before the dining room with barely a crunch.
The latch was certainly loose; just a jiggle and the window swung wide. She hauled herself up onto the wide sill, then sat and swung her legs in.
Easing down to the floor, she closed the window, then listened. The house was asleep-she could feel the silence like a heavy cloak hanging undisturbed all around her. Shadows draped the furniture, rendered deeper by the moonlight slanting through the uncurtained windows. Like all the ground-floor rooms, this room was lined with bookcases. Once her eyes had adjusted enough to pick out the books, she moved silently around the large table.
The door to the front hall stood wide; beyond was a sea of shadows. She paused before the doorway, gathering her courage.
Movement. Just by the foot of the stairs. She froze.
A foot above the floor, a disembodied plume came swaying through the shadows, then the cat lifted its head; its eyes gleamed.
She sagged with relief. The cat considered her, then, unperturbed, paced down the hall, tail raised, still swaying.
Phyllida dragged in a calming breath. It had to be a good sign-a cat would sense any evil intruder. Presumably she was the only intruder tonight. She hadn't expected the murderer to be here, yet…
Putting the nagging worry aside, she crossed the hall, treading lightly, then started up the stairs. She trod close to the banister to minimize the chance of any telltale creak. Reaching the landing, she paused and looked up.
The gallery above was dense with shadow. She took a moment to reorient herself. The last time she'd been upstairs at the Manor was before Horatio had bought it. She knew he'd remodeled and refurbished extensively, but the basic layout of the rooms remained unchanged.
On the way through the wood, she'd distracted herself by planning her search. Horatio had been ill for a week before his death. He'd written to Lucifer in that time, and he'd always had a deal of correspondence. He might have been using the desk himself.
The idea had given her heart. There was no point looking anywhere else before she searched Horatio's room, so she would search it first, even though it was separated from the room Lucifer occupied only by a narrow dressing room.