She didn’t respond right away. “Maybe. But not here.”
“OK. I’m game.” He waited for her lead.
They left the restaurant, meandering toward her apartment, which was also in the direction of his car. “We could sit in my car,” he suggested as he punched the unlock button on his fob. The car chirped and flashed its lights.
“OK.” She plodded toward the passenger door, flopping in like a rag doll.
“Did you hear from Haley that I was getting a divorce?” She was in the passenger seat looking forward out the windshield.
“No. Tonight was the first I’ve heard about it.” He looked squarely at her. “I try to escape gossipy conversation. More than that, I try to escape Haley. She needs a shut-up button. The only thing I knew was that you kicked him out, that it wasn’t the first time, and that your mom and sister think it’s over. Ricky knows we’ve been out a couple times.”
“I wonder how Haley found out,” she mumbled.
Josh let it go as rhetorical.
“Well, I guess it’s true that I need a divorce. It’s hard to admit to yourself that you’ve failed.”
“How did you fail? Did you do something?”
“Yes. I married him. I dragged him to Albuquerque.”
“How is that failure?”
She didn’t answer.
“You didn’t fail,” he said. “You can only do what you can do. You cannot control what he does.”
“No, I’ve never been able to control what Brian does. But sometimes I wonder if I contributed.”
“By being busy?” he questioned. “Who among us isn’t busy?”
“Still—”
Josh said, “He had an affair. Isn’t that how most marriages end?”
“That’s what my mother thinks. She’s been particularly vocal about it.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Have you ever been married? Have you ever had an affair? Have you ever had a nasty break-up?”
“No, yes, yes.”
She giggled. “You’ve never been married, you’ve had an affair, and you’ve had a nasty breakup.”
“Yes, yes, yes.”
“Do you want to tell me about those?”
“Well, I’ve never been married. I’ve never been engaged or seriously contemplated getting married because I focused on my education, and I didn’t want anything to get in the way of it. I’ve had two affairs. One lasted several years, but we drifted apart ending in a nasty breakup. I felt terrible, she felt terrible, and the great relationship I had with her dad and brother made it even worse. Best camping buddies ever. I loved her family, but I didn’t love her.” He paused, but when she didn’t respond, “There!”
“Confession is good for the soul,” she said, looking at him, warming his heart. Her bangs hovered over two-liter glassy eyes. He didn’t know if it was her persona or her physical appearance, but either way, it energized his soul — or something.
“So,” she began, “Brian and I got together when he was a resident, and I was in college. After I graduated, we got married. Our families were happy, but my dad never really clicked with Brian. I started medical school and Brian finished residency and started his fellowship. I think he met her as a resident.”
“Then…”
“He told me he broke it off.”
“Heard that before.”
“I know he didn’t.”
“How did you figure it out the first time?”
“Can I trust you?”
“Yes.”
“Josh,” she said, tilting her head, “Seriously! Can I trust you?”
“Yes, of course.”
“I went for a contraceptive visit and had chlamydia.”
“Shit.”
“Yeah, shit, all right. He denied there was anything wrong with him, tried to blame me, but I made him take the medicine my doctor gave me for him. And worse, my doctor was Dr Scroggins.”
“Our chairman, Dr Scroggins?”
“That one.”
“Then what?”
She looked disgusted. “He begged, promised he wouldn’t ‘ever never do it again,’ so we got back together, and he moved back in. It was after only a week or so. I don’t know what I was thinking.”
Josh shook his head. “If someone did that to me, I’d be totally finished with the relationship.”
“When I kicked him out of the house it was the angriest I’ve ever been.”
“What tripped that?” Josh probed.
“The phone call with the popcorn.” She got quiet. He handed her a tissue.
“Phone call with the popcorn?”
“Yeah. I came home from work. You and I had eaten in the cafeteria. He was supposed to be on call, so I thought he had to stay in the hospital all night. When I got home, he was sitting on the couch watching a movie and he had made popcorn. I took my first bite when the phone rang, and I heard her voice.”
“Faith, I’m sorry. Is this the same woman as the chlamydia, or a different one?”
“I don’t know. I would bet it’s the same one, but I don’t know for sure. It was like he stabbed me in the heart. I couldn’t think. I thought about throwing a chair at him or hitting him with something.”
“But you kicked him out?”
“Yeah. He didn’t even put up much of a fight. He hasn’t been back since, nor have we talked since.”
Josh wanted to ask about a pointed exchange with Brian at rounds recently, but he decided that didn’t constitute ‘talk’ the way she used the word. “So, what has happened since then?”
“Nothing.”
“You weren’t responsible. What he did, he did. You get to keep your dignity.”
“Do you know anything about divorce?”
“No, but my sister’s a lawyer in Santa Fe. You could talk to her.”
She perked up, “Really?”
“Yes. She once told me how to use one of the online services if you don’t have any assets in dispute.” He watched her face, now turned directly to him. “I don’t remember how to do that, but she does.”
“I need to know how to do that,” she said.
Josh grinned. “I can make that happen.”
Marla spoke on speaker startling Faith, “Joshua, what’s up with you?”
He spoke more loudly than he had been speaking to Faith. “I have a classmate — in my same residency year — who needs a cheap divorce.”
“OK.”
“What did you tell me before about on-line services?” Before she could answer, he introduced them. “Marla, this is Faith. Faith Pernitelli, this is Marla Menkowicz.”
“Nice to meet you,” Faith said.
“How about if I send you a template I use in my office. She fills in the blanks, dates, and addresses, signs it, and then sends it back. It belongs to me, so I don’t want it distributed.”
Josh opened another issue. “What will you charge her?”
“Nothing if she’s doing this to marry you. One hundred dollars if she has other ideas.”
Josh started laughing.
Faith’s momentary panic resulted in, “I’ll send a hundred dollars tomorrow.”
“Faith, Marla is joking. Don’t read too much into it. She’s our family clown.”
“I’m not a clown,” Marla said. “Joshua, you need a good woman.”
Josh didn’t want this conversation to go too far, so he said, “Thanks for your help, Marla. Here’s her e-mail address.”
He moved the phone closer to Faith who recited her address.
“I’ll send a copy to you, too, Joshua, in case you married that bimbo you followed around in college and I don’t know about it. Seriously, Faith, he was like a puppy.”
“I was not!”
“Were too.” “Were not.” “Were too.” The call ended.
Faith sat up straight. “I can’t believe you did that!”
“Why not? You don’t have to use the template, you don’t have to get a divorce, you don’t have to do anything. But now you’re empowered.”
“Mm. I like empowered.”