A low rumble outside made them both jump. Harri got hold of himself. “Well, then. We’re out of time. I’m sorry about what has to happen now, but that’s just how it is. You’ve left us no choice.”
There was a stinging pain in her arm. “Berols’ Anna,” Vanja said. Pressure was spreading through her chest, making it hard to breathe. Her field of vision began to flicker and narrow. Through the haze, she saw the speaker lean in, his eyes widened. “Berols’ Anna is coming.”
“Keep her sedated until it’s done,” Ladis’ Harri said from far away.
LATER
The bed was comfortable. The pillow was so soft against Vanja’s cheek. The blankets were warm and snuggly, and someone had dressed her in soft sleep clothes. She considered getting up but abandoned the thought. She was warm. She hadn’t been warm for such a long time. Even her toes and the tip of her nose were warm.
Vanja was a little girl. Lars put his arms around her, and she burrowed her face into his shoulder. He smelled of soil and coffee and beard.
“I missed you,” she told him. “I missed you, too,” he said.
She drew away and looked at him. His temples were covered in black scabs. “They got you.”
He nodded gravely. “So they did.”
“I understand now,” Vanja said. “We don’t know where we are.”
“Good girl,” Lars said, and patted her cheek. “Good girl.”
Two voices were talking to each other above her head. She tried looking at the speakers but couldn’t seem to focus her eyes.
“Could you please be quick about it,” the lower voice said. “I have somewhere to be.”
“Calm down,” an older, higher voice replied. “It’ll take as long as it takes.”
Something tightened above Vanja’s left elbow. A couple of fingers tapped at the crook of her arm.
“I can’t find a vein,” the high voice said.
“I heard the whole first quadrant locked themselves in the mushroom chambers,” the low voice said. “But no one issued an order for that, did they?”
A sigh. The pressure around her left arm eased. “No.”
A tightening above the right elbow. Tap, tap at the crook of her arm. “There we go. No, there was no order. I guess the first quadrant panicked.”
“But why aren’t we heading down there? Why are we standing around in here? Everything’s going crazy.”
A wet cold grazed the inside of Vanja’s arm. “Because the mushroom farm isn’t safe. If we’re going anywhere, it’s to the commune office. And besides, hiding isn’t exactly sensible. If everyone hides, we have no defense. Amatka is here because we are.”
A sharp prick of pain sank into Vanja’s skin.
Vanja was a girl again. She was standing on the ice. Daylight fell across the lake, but the ice lay clear and black under her feet. Lars stood a couple of feet away, a little smile on his face.
“Let me show you something,” he said.
He stepped behind her, then took her head between his hands and pressed his thumbs against her temples. “Look up, Vanja. Look at the sky.”
The clouds drew aside. The sky opened. The light was unbearably bright.
Someone came into the room and gave her water. Her head hurt. She forced her eyes open, but they wouldn’t focus. Her eyelids closed again. She said something, and a hand lightly stroked her forehead in response. She asked where she was. The hand patted her on the shoulder and straightened her blankets.
A warm hand on hers. “Vanja?”
Fingers weaving themselves with her own. “Vanja, it’s Nina. Can you hear me?”
Vanja turned her head. It hurt. She said something.
“I’m so sorry, Vanja,” Nina said. “I’m so sorry. I did what I thought was right.”
It’s all right, Vanja tried to say, I’m all right. A noise came out, something that was not what she had wanted to say.
“Let’s give it some time,” Nina said. “You’ll be fine. You’ll be fine.”
Cool lips on her cheek.
“I have to go,” Nina said. “They don’t know I’m here. I’ll be back.”
A voice Vanja recognized, a man’s voice. Someone leaning in close. The smell of coffee and liquor. “What’s her condition?”
A woman’s voice: “The procedure was successful. It’s still early on, but she’s shown signs of aphasia. What type of aphasia remains to be seen, but it’s clear that she can’t form words.”
“Good.”
“Why is she so important, Harri?”
“I’m not at liberty to tell you that. Only that it’s very, very important that she doesn’t speak.”
“Well, we’ve made sure of that.”
“Very good.”
“What’s really happening out there?”
“We need to stay strong,” Harri replied. “Let me know if there’s any change in her condition.”
“Will do.”
Ladis’ Harri’s presence disappeared. Vanja managed to open her eyes. A woman’s face swam into view, a very young nurse. “Can you hear me?” she said.
Vanja replied. “It’s all right,” the nurse said. “Just nod or shake your head for yes and no. Do you understand?”
Vanja nodded. “Do you understand what happened to you, Vanja?”
Vanja nodded again, slowly.
The nurse reached out and wiped her cheek. “I’m so sorry. Please don’t cry. I don’t know why they did this to you. I just do the aftercare. I have to go. Something’s happening out there.”
The nurse left. Vanja heard the sound of a key being turned in a lock.
There was a window on the left side of the bed. Darkness was falling. No one came to turn any lights on in her room. The sound of running feet and a murmur of voices came through the window. Vanja turned on her side. Her pillow was so soft her whole face sank into it. She could glimpse a piece of sky through the upper-right corner of her window. Little lights scurried back and forth up there. She watched them until her eyes fell shut again.
Vanja stood on the tundra. Ulla stood in front of her. Her funnel rested against her shoulder and her hair was sprinkled with frost. She looked at Vanja and nodded.
“It’s done,” she said. “Anna is coming.”
Clamoring could be heard from outside: short and long shouts; rumbling, mechanical shrieks. Vanja listened to them for a while. She had to pee. No one came to give her a bottle or a bedpan. Eventually her belly began to hurt. She sat up. When her vision cleared, she could see her legs stretch out from her body in a bed with three blankets. To the left there was a wall with a window, at the foot of the bed another wall. On the right stood a little table, and beyond the table there was a wall with a closed door. A pitcher of water stood on the table. Vanja reached for the pitcher with her right hand, but her fingers wouldn’t close around the handle. After a couple of failed attempts, she grabbed it with her left hand instead. The water was tepid and sweet. Some of it trickled out the right corner of her mouth. She put the pitcher back and took three shaky steps toward the door. Her legs were fairly steady, although the right foot dragged a little. She couldn’t get the door handle to budge.
She took the pitcher and set it down on the floor, fumbled her pants down to her knees, and crouched. The commotion outside continued unabated. She pulled her pants back up and crawled onto the bed. Sirens began to wail. She couldn’t keep her eyes open.
A banging noise on the door. “Vanja! Vanja!”