She grimaced. She’d hoped he might have forgotten that business. When she’d met Rosemary during the previous winter, she’d seized the chance to ask some frank questions she couldn’t ask of anyone else. Grayling would never approve. “A personal matter.”
“You were my friend first.” He scowled. “At least I can be certain I’ll learn what it is before Rothwell does.”
Arabella faced the garden too. Merrick had been instrumental in seeing Lady Grayling’s advice put into practice. With Rosemary’s help, she’d been as well prepared as any new bride for what had happened in Merrick’s bed, and it still hadn’t been enough. She caught herself many times dwelling on what they’d done together. She’d been completely unprepared for how the experience had changed her. She could not stop thinking of Merrick today.
“Don’t tell me he knows too?”
When she winced, Grayling stood and walked a few steps away. “For goodness sake, why on earth would you tell Rothwell?”
She stared at his broad back, feeling nothing but friendship for Grayling and mild irritation that he wasn’t taking her silence well. “Because the matter wasn’t something that concerned you.”
He ran his hand through his hair. “Are you ill?”
“No.”
“Penniless?”
Now that was a question for another day. She did not know exactly how her finances stood at the present moment. She would likely need Gray’s assistance, or Merrick’s if they continued as friends, to discover where she stood if she did not want to deal with Farnsworth directly. “Not quite.”
He stared hard at her. “With child and the bastard won’t offer to marry you?”
The terrace door banged behind them and Rosemary hurried out, one hand held protectively over her growing belly. “Grayling, do end your inquisition and lower your voice. Can you not see our dear Arabella’s heart is already under siege?”
“What the devil!” He turned on his wife angrily. “You stay out of it. Don’t give me the business of it not being my business. If not for your interference then I might have been able to solve Arabella’s problem already.”
Rosemary’s lips firmed in a tight line, her eyes narrowed to slits. “Is that so?”
With no way now to deflect Grayling and a fight brewing between them over the misunderstanding, Arabella raised her hands to admit defeat. “Oh, for heaven’s sake, this is ridiculous. I will not have the pair of you fight over who is the better friend. I went to London with the intention of finding a lover, Gray. You certainly would not have helped me with that. I asked Rosemary’s advice on intimacy and she was kind enough to answer my questions. There, now you know it all.”
Grayling spun so fast to face her that he staggered a few steps. His mouth opened, then closed. He glanced between Arabella and his wife and then spun about again and left in a rush, heading for the stables.
Rosemary sighed heavily and sank onto the bench beside Arabella. “Maybe next time he will believe me when I say he doesn’t need to know. From what I’ve gleaned, he sees you as a sister. One never wants to imagine one’s siblings engaged in intimate acts.”
“Perhaps.” Arabella slumped. “What am I going to do?”
“I take it that Rothwell has turned your head around.”
Rosemary just might be the most perceptive woman she’d ever met. “I never said it was him.”
“My dear, you did not have to.” Rosemary shifted closer. “I have eyes enough to see a hungry man staring at what he wants to devour. It surprises me that Gray hasn’t guessed the two of you are involved. You have spent quite a few days with him alone and I’ve never seen a man so reluctant to leave a lady, even in the care of his friends.”
A smile tugged at Arabella’s lips as she thought of Merrick’s protracted leave taking. “He is protective.”
“I think with good reason. What haven’t you told Grayling about the season?”
“Quite a bit. I didn’t want to worry him.”
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“I don’t know that it would do any good.” She sighed. “I failed as a chaperone, was physically assaulted by my brother-in-law, almost forced into marriage with someone I barely knew and didn’t care for at all, then slept with a man who should have been wicked except he claimed to love me.”
Rosemary slipped an arm around her back and hugged her close. “A busy season.”
She glanced sideways. “Far more than I anticipated.”
“Life can be like that,” Rosemary said and then sighed heavily. “I see now why you were reluctant to tell Gray the whole story and why Rothwell has become protective of you. Are you all right?”
Arabella was about to answer when a large hand clapped over her shoulder.
“Who the hell seduced you?” Grayling demanded.
Arabella sat up at the anger in his voice. A hot flush had swept over his features and he looked fit to kill.
“When did you return?”
“Not soon enough,” he growled. “Now answer me. Who do I have to kill?”
Rosemary clucked her tongue. “Really, darling, can you not guess who might have a claim on Arabella’s affections?”
His gaze darted between them and then his eyes narrowed. “Rothwell? Damn him. I’ll kill the bastard when he returns.”
“Oh no, you will not.” Arabella wasn’t about to be bullied by Grayling. She was more than capable of managing her own intimate affairs. “Not when I asked him to.”
His eyes widened, and then his stare became quite unnerving. Was this what it was like to have a brother to answer to? All of a sudden he grinned. “This is perfect. He’ll marry you.”
Rosemary shook her head sadly and stood. “I’ll leave him to you, my dear, but if you need help banging some sense into his head, I’ll do my best.”
Although Arabella had never held back in prior conversations with Grayling, she wouldn’t have minded having Rosemary at her side for this one. “Excuse me?”
Grayling tucked his hands behind his back and began to pace along the flagstone squares. “I should be furious, but there is an easy way out of this situation. I don’t want to lose my best friend, but if he doesn’t propose to you then I’m going to enjoy hurting him. The two of you will simply marry and that will be that.”
“We’ll do no such thing.” Arabella sighed and collected her cup and saucer to put them on the tray for a servant to take. “I don’t intend to marry. Excuse me, I’d like to visit with the children again before Merrick returns.”
“Merrick now, is it?” Gray teased.
“Oh, keep quiet.” She turned toward the house. “It’s not like you’ve never been in a similar situation,” she muttered.
“I’ll have you know I didn’t expect to marry again so soon,” Grayling reminded her as he blocked her escape. “But a very good friend threw the perfect woman at me and I had a second chance to have a fulfilling life. You deserve to be in love.”
Rothwell had claimed her perfect, but she didn’t think that true. There were many things she would change about herself if she could. “It’s not the same. I don’t have the faintest idea of whether I love him.”
His eyes narrowed at her admission. “There’s nothing to stop you being as happy as we are. You just have to be brave enough to jump.”
She sank into a chair. “I’m not sure I am ready to marry again.”
“Then that is an impediment only you can overcome. Rothwell has proven he’s a man of honor by protecting you as he did. I’m not entirely happy about your affair, but only you can decide whether he’s worth the risk of loving.” Grayling leaned down and kissed the top of her head. “If he makes you happy, Bella, then tell me what have you got to lose? You have my blessing, if that helps. Augusta would approve, too, I think. She always had a soft spot for him.”