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§ On my return, I went to half a dozen radio and TV stations, showing my photographs, carrying my stacks of tapes, but the general consensus was that they just keep breeding and getting massacred over there, and so what? — “The Little Brown People,” an American oil executive called them. It was as though he was speaking of sprites and fairies. — “They’re like children,” he said sadly. “I know. I’ve spent twenty years in Asia. The Little Brown People are charming really but they can’t think beyond today.”

‖ In my fund-raising ventures I set out two coffee cans. One said REFUGEES and the other said REBELS. How thoughtful I was! I remember my first time, when at the end of the evening I found that the refugees were now thirty dollars richer, and the rebels had gained nine dollars. Well, the amounts were modest, but at least, at last, I was accomplishing something! But, as it turned out, U.C. Berkeley charged me forty dollars for the use of the room.

a “We’ve now had a chance to give careful consideration to your book on Afghanistan,” wrote Houghton Mifflin in 1983. “Certainly your journey there was a remarkable one, as was your boldness in making it. Our problems with the manuscript are not so much with the keenness of your perceptions as with what we feel is the nature of your presentation … From our point of view … though the book might be well regarded by reviewers, we’d have a hard time finding a large enough audience for it to be able to publish in a way that would satisfy either you or us. I am therefore regretfully returning the manuscript to you …”

b For more on this, see the interview with Mary McMorrow, below.

8. “… DESCRIBED FORMALLY AS REFUGEE CAMPS …”: CORRUPTION (1982)

AFGHAN WOMAN: You are a tourist?

YOUNG MAN: NO, a fund-raiser.

AFGHAN WOMAN: You raise lots of money, or only a few thousand dollars?

YOUNG MAN: Probably just a few thousand dollars.

AFGHAN WOMAN: I think you should either really help us or not help us at all. You are not helping us.

An Afghanistan Picture Show [1]

Meanwhile his eyes were blinking, and his Afghanistan Picture Show, with which he would galvanize the world, was staring at him like the two little girls who stared at him between tents. One’s hair was combed, and she wore a clean white dress. The other was unkempt, with a dirty face and a faded wrinkled dress; she scratched an insect bite on her knee. Both were beautiful; both were shy. They stared and stared at him; they would never have enough of him. How strange he was! What did he want? Why had he come to them? Why was he so thin and pale and sweating? Something must be wrong with him. The two girls watched him, hoping that he would neither go away nor come closer. His Picture Show was staring at him like the two small boys who squatted down between the tent and the clay box that they lived in; they clasped hands over knees; they smiled, and between them was an empty tin that said: BUTTEROIL 99.8 % MILKFAT GIFT OF THE EUROPEAN ECONOMIC COMMUNITY, and another empty tin which had been made into a bucket stood on top of their house and the ground was packed baked cracked clay; it was staring like the square-eyed houses of clay watched him, thatch hanging down over their foreheads like the bangs of the refugee boys, and inside one of them the wide-faced boy who had lost his father to the Roos stared at the Young Man through brownish-green eyes, one hand pressed against his temple as if to help him stare even harder, and the Young Man thought: well, maybe I can do some good after all; maybe I can at least be a diversion; and behind the boy, a patterned blanket made a rainbow.

But he could not yet see what these things meant. He was too busy analyzing and solving once and for all (as he had all the other problems) the issue of

CORRUPTION

In effect, Marie Sardie was offering two arguments for the “extras”—the first being the expedient one that the situation might reverse itself of its own accord in the future, as with the Tibetan refugees, in which case hoarded “extras” might be needed; the second being that even with the “extras” malnutrition still existed, so the arbitrary curve could be drawn without being arbitrary at all, and the Young Man’s complicated doubts about omniscience and fairness became irrelevant: either people were malnourished or they were not.

“Whether you’re a one-month-old baby or a forty-year-old man you get the same ration,” Marie Sardie explained, “so there’s more than enough for everybody, which, even without the corruption of bogus registered families, allows them to have excess food to sell on the market to get other food and things that they need.”

“So,” said the Young Man, “you think that between the extra food and the fifty-rupee-a-month allowance most of the families do okay?”

She leaned back in her chair. “I don’t know about this fifty-rupee-a-month allowance,” she said. “Most of them are lucky to see it once a year or twice a year. On paper the refugees receive it, but the experience is that they usually don’t get it.”

“Where does it go?”

She laughed. “Like most other things here, through other people’s hands and pockets!”

THINGS THAT PEOPLE WOULDN’T SAY ON TAPE [2]

The refugees sold their medicines in the bazaars. (I was so shocked when I first heard this!)

STATEMENT OF THE AFGHAN WAITER (continued)

“Food and medicine, that is right, some people sell them. I don’t know if they are Afghans. Once I bought the medicine from one shop and there was written on the medicine: SPECIAL FOR AFGHAN REFUGEES.

HELPLESSNESS [7]

The issue of corruption had begun to occupy the Young Man increasingly. His mind turned to the notion of secret plots. If he could only show that the refugees (like the smiling boy whose skin was just a little redder than cocoa holding his little brother in his arms for the Young Man to see; the little one holding something in a bundle of white cotton cloth that he would not unwrap; he held the twist of it down tight with three brown fingers and his brown face looked at the Young Man so raptly as he almost smiled, his mouth curving in something shy and sweet), if he could only show that the refugees were being cheated, or the Mujahideen were being hindered systematically, he would feel much better. That would be a problem whose solutions were theoretically clear. He resisted the parable of the beer cans. He did not want to admit that the shoulder of every road is heaped with waste and wreckage. How much nicer it would be simply to post a sign that said: PENALTY FOR LITTERING Rs. 500. As I reread these interviews years later I feel equally helpless.

STATEMENT OF THE AFGHAN DOCTOR (continued)

“For example, maybe a medical commander distributes food rations. He makes about four or five rations for himself, and he needs just one; this is one corruption I can tell you about.”

STATEMENT OF MARY McMORROW (continued)

“You give cereal to a mother for one child,” Mary said, “and you know the other seven children are going to eat it, as well as the husband.”