'I supposed he had — a mistress in London. I didn't know who it was.
'Oh, but their relations are entirely chaste! said Emma. She said it with a viperous satisfaction, watching beady-eyed for its effect on Hugh.
Hugh's annoyance began to fix itself on Emma, and as he glared at her veiled sardonic face he felt with a certain zest more present to her, as if some more of him had arrived. 'I'm shocked to hear it, he said. 'That makes it worse.
'Why, pray? said Emma. She was hunched, pleased, curled like a snake in a hole.
'I don't know, said Hugh. 'Surely you understand what's involved? Randall's wife is made wretched —
'And all for nothing? Oh, but it's not for nothing. It's for something beautiful. .
'Is Lindsay in love with him?
'She loves us both.
'But you know about Ann?
'I've never permitted Randall to discuss his wife with us. That wouldn't have been right. She said it with an air of self-righteousness which was clearly designed as a provocation.
Hugh stared at her, bewildered and fascinated. He felt himself confronted with an entirely unfamiliar moral world, a world which seemed to have its own seriousness, even its own rules, while remaining entirely exotic and alien. Yet the experience itself, the puzzlement, the sense of danger, the shock, that was familiar; and it came to his mind how much of Emma's fascination had lain for him in her moral otherness. She had composed even the simplest scene quite differently. This had seemed to him her dangerousness, but also her originality, her freedom. And he had then been aware with a little thrill of excitement that this novelty of vision was related to something in her character which was dark, perhaps twisted. He had, in the interim, forgotten. He had withdrawn those darker colours from her image.
As he now, hastily and imprecisely, began to restore them he felt something move within him. It was, surely the old love, the real one. 'Randall has behaved beautifully, said Emma. She gave a high-pitched laugh.
He had forgotten that laugh. 'I don't understand you, he said, 'and I certainly don't understand what Randall thinks he's up to. Are you fond of my son?
'I love him, said Emma, with studied simplicity.
Hugh looked at her clever mysterious face. What was she thinking about him? He hardened his expression. She must not yet see his melting bewilderment, but only that he was still capable of fighting with her. He hated the idea of Randall's frequentation; and as he felt the old alarming thrill he measured with dismay the implications of Randall's being, so mysteriously but so authoritatively, around. He said, 'Will you come over to my flat soon, tomorrow perhaps, and see my Tintoretto? You've never seen it, have you? I got it after we — parted. It's a very fine one. He wanted their speech with each other to become simple.
'See your Tintoretto forsooth, said Emma. 'I shouldn't think so.
I mean, I shouldn't think I'll come.
'Don't torment me, Emma, said Hugh. He said the words dryly enough. He had said them before, and in wilder tones.
'How far you have come and how quickly! she said with her shrill laugh. 'You surprise me — and yet you don't. Do you realize we haven't talked to each other for twenty-five years? And you behave as if we were two people who were acquainted.
'But it doesn't matter, does it? It's impossible to believe it's so long.
We patently are acquainted.
'Twenty-five years matters. I can hardly think of anything that matters more, she said sharply.
'Be simple with me, Emma, said Hugh. 'Help me. Coming to see you like this I am put in the position of a fool. You must be merciful to me. He had often spoken to her like this in the old days.
She shook her head. 'God put you in the position of a fool, my dear.
And as for simplicity, I am being ever so simple. Honour satisfied. Curiosity satisfied. Time to go, Hugh.
'But you will come tomorrow?
'Certainly not. Not tomorrow or the day after or ever.
'Emma! Hugh rose: 'You can't behave like this. If you weren't going to be kind to me you shouldn't have let me see you. I must see you again. I insist.
Emma looked up at him, toad-like, her shoulders humped. 'Yes, I remember you, she said. 'I remember those touching accents of the deprived child. The world has a strict obligation to be kind to Hugh Peronett. But I didn't particularly want to see you, it was your idea. I am happy here. I have all I want. I have my happy family. As for insisting, you know perfectly well that you are in no position to insist.
'I don't know what you mean by your happy family, said Hugh, 'but I do know that you are being deliberately cruel to me.
'You were deliberately cruel to me.
He looked down at her cold face, and his hands moved weakly, gesturing the judgement away. He felt its injustice passionately. It was she who was the cruel one. And he felt that these words, these strugglings, had occurred before. 'Ah, if you just want to punish me — but you can't — not after so long. Anyway you can, if you see more of me, do it much more beautifully.
Emma laughed. 'You can still startle me with your moments of intelligence! Anyway, I didn't say I wouldn't see you, I only said I wouldn't come to your flat.
'So — you might see me — here, for instance?
'Not for instance. Just here. But I'm not sure. I'll think about it.
'Now you must go.
'But I shall want to talk to you — properly. I shall want to talk to you-alone.
'Why don't you say what you mean? I had to adopt Randall, I had to let him in. It has worked beautifully.
'I'm not sure if I want to be — adopted — into your family, said Hugh. 'It's —
'You're not being asked, said Emma.
Yes, it was the old love and the old pain. He had forgotten the extent to which, before, he had quite simply been her slave. He said abjectly, 'When can I come?
'I'll think whether I want to see you again. I may decide there's no point in it.
'And you won't come to Brompton Square?
'No. Then suddenly she said, 'Would you take me to Grayhallock if I asked?
Hugh was surprised, shocked, pleased. He said, 'Certainly, I'd be delighted to. But the next moment he felt that his willingness was a betrayal of Ann. He ought not, surely, to display her abandoned condition to the cold curious gaze of Randall's protector. And it was almost as if he felt that if he allowed Emma to come there she might put a spell on them all. The people at Grayhallock, what was left of them, were after all his family.
'I'll think about that too, said Emma. 'Now do go. I keep asking you to go and you pay no attention. Those children will be back any moment.
He approached her. He wished before leaving to startle her into a moment of warmth; for he had the impression, and he looked forward to reflecting on it, that she was concealing at least some pleasure at seeing him again.
She said, 'I suppose I owe it to you after all that I turned to the consolations of art! Her laugh, as she looked up at him, seemed more nervous.
She watched him with raised eyebrows as he knelt down slowly and awkwardly beside her chair. As he looked at her now in silence he felt again, as he had felt when he entered the room, that miraculous sense of her being which made a solitude; only this time it was a solitude where only she was. It was he who was absent. Surely this was love. Still looking he groped for her hand.
She drew in a long breath. After a moment she whispered, as if to conceal the words even from herself, 'Ah, you should have been braver then. Shouldn't you? Shouldn't you?
He said 'Yes' with so full a heart that he could no longer face her.
He lifted the dry, stained, bony hand towards his lips. It smelt so strongly of nicotine that he could not prevent himself from inhaling in an ecstasy of memory before he kissed it.