YES.
DID ANY WORDS PARTICULARLY EXCITE YOU?
YES.
WHICH ONES?
I LIKED IT WHEN SHE CALLED HIM HER ‘HARD MASTER’. I LIKED IT WHEN SHE KISSED HIS HAND AND THANKED HIM.
WHAT ABOUT THE PICTURES?
I LIKED THE SHOT OF MONICA FROM BEHIND, BEFORE HE PULLS HER INTO THE VAN. I LIKED THE EXPRESSION ON HER FACE WHEN HE’S MOUNTING HER AND SHE’S LOOKING BACK AT HIM. I LIKED THE WAY HE’S PULLING HER TO HIM AS HE PUSHES INTO HER.
HOW WOULD YOU RATE THIS STORY? MARKS OUT OF TEN.
EIGHT.
CRITICAL COMMENTS?
YOU COULD HAVE SPUN IT OUT A BIT LONGER: MORE DETAIL; MORE DIALOGUE; MORE PICTURES.
DID YOU LIKE IT THAT IT HAPPENED AT NIGHT?
YES.
WHY?
THE NIGHT IS DARK AND SECRET. THERE IS FEAR IN IT. THERE ARE THINGS HIDDEN IN THE DARKNESS. ONE FEELS THE BEATING OF THE HEART, SEES LESS, SENSES MORE. PERCEPTIONS AND RESPONSES ARE HEIGHTENED.
PERCEPTIONS OF WHAT? RESPONSES TO WHAT?
THE UNKNOWN THAT LURKS AHEAD, THE STRANGE THAT IS BEYOND ONE’S CONTROL. WHAT IS FEARED IS ALSO SOMETIMES HOPED FOR.
DID YOU LIKE IT THAT MONICA WAS AFRAID?
YES.
DID IT EXCITE YOU?
YES.
WHY?
MONICA’S NAKEDNESS UNDER HER CLOTHES, HER SILKY RED BUSH RUBBING AGAINST HER SILK KNICKERS, HER WHITE THIGHS, HER RIPE AND BOUNCY BOTTOM, HER NIPPLES STIFFENING WITH HER THOUGHTS — ALL OF HER SWEET FLESH WAS VULNERABLE TO THE STRANGER WHO WAS STALKING HER. WHY THE IDEA OF A WOMAN AS PREY IS A TURN-ON FOR ME I CAN’T SAY, BUT JUDGING BY THE NUMBER OF FILMS IN WHICH A SEXY WOMAN IS AT THE MERCY OF A MAN OR MONSTER, IT’S A TURN-ON FOR A GREAT MANY: A WOMAN POWERLESS AND FORCED TO SUBMIT.
DID YOU PARTICULARLY ENJOY HER SUBMISSION?
YES. DID YOU?
I’M NOT SAYING. YOU SAID THAT WHAT IS FEARED IS SOMETIMES HOPED FOR. DO YOU THINK MONICA WAS HOPING TO BE RAPED?
WHEN SHE THOUGHT ABOUT IT SHE FOUND ‘STRANGE PICTURES IN HER MIND, STRANGE STIRRINGS IN HER BODY’, SO IT WOULD SEEM THAT THE IDEA EXCITED HER.
WHY WOULD THE IDEA EXCITE HER?
WELL, SHE HADN’T BEEN GETTING SATISFACTION WITH GERALD, AND THE STORY SEEMED TO HINT THAT SHE WAS READY FOR A BIT OF ROUGH; SHE WANTED A STRANGER TO TAKE CONTROL OF HER, TO BE HER HARD MASTER.
DO YOU THINK SOME WOMEN ACTUALLY FEEL THIS WAY?
I THINK ANYONE CAN FEEL ALL KINDS OF WAYS AND THIS IS ONE OF THEM.
YOU THINK SOME WOMEN WANT TO BE RAPED?
NOT ALL OF THE TIME BUT I BELIEVE THAT ANYONE WILL CONSIDER ANYTHING SOME OF THE TIME.
HAVE YOU EVER CONSIDERED RAPING A WOMAN?
NOT VIOLENTLY — I’VE NEVER HAD THAT MUCH CONFIDENCE.
HOW THEN?
IN FANTASY ONLY, WITH THE WOMAN MADE HELPLESS IN SOME WAY.
THE WOMAN AS A HELPLESS VICTIM.
AS I SAID, FANTASY.
WHAT ABOUT THE BLACKNESS OF THE RAPIST IN THIS STORY?
THAT DEFINITELY HEIGHTENED THE STORY. THE FACT OF HIS BEING THE OTHER ADDS TO THE EXCITEMENT. ONE CAN’T HELP THINKING OF BLACK MEN AS BEING MORE POWERFUL SEXUALLY THAN WHITE MEN.
WHAT ABOUT THE ANAL INTERCOURSE? DID THAT ADD TO OR DETRACT FROM YOUR PLEASURE?
WHAT DO YOU THINK?
YOU TELL ME.
‘This woman that I’m talking to isn’t the one in the photographs,’ Klein said to himself. ‘In my mind she doesn’t look like her or smell like her and she’s not naked or in her underwear.’ The woman he imaged now was short and stocky, wearing jeans and a sweatshirt and horn-rimmed spectacles; her hair had grown shorter and her smell was not quite as seductive as before.
WE WERE TALKING ABOUT ANAL INTERCOURSE, said the screen.
WELL, THE ANUS IS NOT QUITE THE APPROVED ORIFICE FOR INTERCOURSE, IS IT. SO PENETRATION THERE HAS THE APPEAL OF THE FORBIDDEN AND IT’S MORE INTIMATE, MORE EXCITING TO THINK ABOUT, ESPECIALLY IF THE WOMAN IS UNWILLING. MONICA DIDN’T SEEM ALL THAT UNWILLING, ACTUALLY. BY THE WAY, WHAT ARE YOU WEARING?
THIS ISN’T THAT KIND OF CHAT. THIS PORNOGRAPHIC FANTASY THAT YOU’VE JUST WATCHED, WOULD YOU SAY IT WAS EVIL?
I’VE HAD FANTASIES LIKE THAT OFTEN ENOUGH — I’M SURE OTHER MEN DO AS WELL. I’D NEVER WANT TO ACT THEM OUT EVEN IF I WERE ABLE TO. BUT WHEN YOU PUT SUCH WORDS AND PICTURES ONSCREEN FOR THE GENERAL PUBLIC THERE’S NO KNOWING WHOM YOU’RE REACHING. AND IT COULD WELL BE THAT NAMING AND SHOWING A FORBIDDEN ACT IS LIKE CALLING UP A DEMON BY SPEAKING ITS NAME. SOMEONE JUST ON THE EDGE OF ACTING OUT HIS FANTASIES MIGHT LET HIMSELF GO ALL THE WAY AFTER SEEING IT. SO I’D HAVE TO CALL IT AN EVIL THING.
THEN BY VISITING THIS WEBSITE ARE YOU SUPPORTING EVIL?
WHAT ABOUT YOU? IN OFFERING THIS MATERIAL WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING?
CONTRIBUTING TO THE EVIL IN THE WORLD THE SAME AS YOU BUT I’M DOING IT IN AN EFFORT TO UNDERSTAND PORNOGRAPHY AND THE ENORMOUS DEMAND FOR IT, OK? I HAVE MORE QUESTIONS.
SO ASK THEM.
DID MONICA’S MONDAY NIGHT AROUSE YOU SEXUALLY?
IN A MANNER OF SPEAKING.
WHAT WILL YOU DO ABOUT IT?
TAKE MYSELF IN HAND.
HOW OLD ARE YOU, RUGGIERO?
SEVENTY-TWO. HOW OLD ARE YOU?
TWENTY-EIGHT. ARE YOU STILL A PLAYER?
ONLY WITH MYSELF. IF I HAD AN INNER VOICE I WOULDN’T BE TELLING YOU ALL THIS.
EXPLAIN PLEASE.
THE VOICE IN YOUR HEAD THAT CENSORS WHAT YOU’RE GOING TO SAY, I HAVEN’T GOT ONE ANY MORE.
THAT COULD GET YOU INTO ALL KINDS OF TROUBLE.
IT HAS. NOW I’M TRYING TO MEET UP WITH MY IT. (He didn’t want to bring Oannes into the conversation.)
AREN’T WE ALL? I FEEL FOR YOU, RUGGIERO. MAYBE I CAN BE YOUR INNER VOICE FOR A WHILE. YOUR WORDS LOOK LONELY. HAVE YOU GOT A PARTNER?
NOT ANY MORE.
WHY NOT?
MY WIFE DIED TWENTY YEARS AGO.
HOW?
SUICIDE.
WHY?
TIRED OF LIVING, I GUESS.
WHAT MADE HER TIRED OF LIVING?
CAN WE TALK ABOUT SOMETHING ELSE? ARE YOU MARRIED?
GOD FORBID.
WHY DO YOU SAY THAT?
MARRIAGE IS FOR PEOPLE WILLING TO GIVE UP THEIR FREEDOM FOR SOMETHING THAT IN MY OPINION IS NOT WORTH HAVING.
WHAT MY WIFE AND I HAD WAS WORTH HAVING. ‘What exactly did we have?’ he asked himself.
WE MUST COME BACK TO THAT SOMETIME. ANYBODY SINCE HER?
NOTHING THAT LASTED VERY LONG, AND THERE’S BEEN NO ONE FOR A LONG TIME. The Angelica in his imagination, though no longer the beauty in the homepage photograph, was not unattractive, he decided, mumbling his thoughts. ‘Good ass, heavy thighs and a lot of coarse pubic hair. Her smell is strong and funky; I like it. She probably tastes a little acidic.’
DO YOU MISS HAVING A WOMAN? she was asking.
YES, AND THERE’S THE DISMAL FACT THAT A MAN WHO CAN NO LONGER GET IT UP IS NOT IN A STRONG BARGAINING POSITION WHEN LOOKING FOR A NEW WOMAN.
MAYBE IT’S TIME FOR YOU TO HANG UP YOUR TACKLE AND PUT ALL THAT BEHIND YOU.
ALL THE SAME, I’D STILL LIKE TO HAVE SOME OF IT IN FRONT OF ME.