Number two: my ex-husband. I'd just started working for a local party-planning business, and Richard the Bastard had strolled in looking all suave and self-assured, needing help with a business function. He was a divorce lawyer and ten years my senior. Caught in his charismatic snare, I'd requested that I be assigned to him. I don't know why, but he'd taken an instant liking to me, as well, and had romanced the hell out of me.
We married soon after.
Right after the ceremony, he'd hinted that I needed to quit my job. He hadn't said it in so many words, but he'd wanted me to devote every waking moment to him. So I stupidly did it. I'd loved him and wanted to make him happy. And a small part of me had liked the thought of taking care of him. How romantic it had seemed. Give up everything for love and all that crap. Yeah. Right. I'd known better. My mom had given up her life for my dad, as well.
What had my let-me-please-you personality won me? A husband who had sometimes ignored me, always taken me for granted and never found me good enough. A husband who'd found me lacking and hadn't minded telling me so.
A husband who'd preferred to spread his love all over Texas rather than sleep with his own wife. Yep, I'd known better.
After our divorce, no one had wanted to hire me. I'd not only slept with a big-name client, I'd walked away from a job without notice, as well. What's worse, I'd deserved the lack of confidence from potential employers. How much more stupid could I have been?
I'd been forced to start my own business with what little money I had. I was glad for that now, of course, but six months ago I'd been an emotional wreck, scared of failure and nearing bankruptcy. Perhaps I could have done something different, taken a menial job I'd hate, but I had no skills other than party planning and honestly couldn't see myself doing anything else.
Was history repeating itself? I suddenly wondered.
Here I was again, lusting after a client and determined to have an affair with him. Like Richard, Royce had developed an instant attraction to me, something I just didn't understand. It was too rare. Most men preferred the lithe beauty of Kera or the wild, untamed personality of Mel.
I massaged the muscles in my neck and pretended to study the clothes in front of me. What was it with me and men with names that started with R? If a man's first name started with R, was I destined to find him irresistible?
"Uh, Naomi. Hello?"
Kera's voice penetrated my thoughts. I shook my head, forcing myself to concentrate on her and not the past. "What?"
"You were in some sort of sad, I'm-about-to-cry-or-kill-someone trance. I asked what you were thinking about."
"Richard. Royce. My own stupidity." I waved a hand through the air, effectively cutting off that line of conversation. "It doesn't matter. Mel," I said, "there's a guy I want to introduce you to. He's very cute. Tall, dark hair. Good sense of humor."
Mel's vivid features brightened. "Who is he?"
"His name is Colin Phillips and he works for Royce." I recalled what Royce had told me about the man, that Colin was a love 'em and leave 'em kind of guy. That made him perfect for Mel, who never lasted more than a few weeks in any romantic relationship. She talked a good talk, wanting me to take the marriage plunge, but when it came to herself she was just as anti-marriage as I was.
"Hey." Kera turned away from us to scrutinize a bubble-knit shirt. "I've met Colin. He was at the wedding I catered for that girl, Denise… Danny? What was her name?"
"Daisy." I nodded. "That's the one. His sister."
"You'll like him, Mel," Kera said. "He's more than cute. He's scrumptiously sexy."
Mel crossed her arms over her chest, her red manicured fingernails tapping on her slender biceps. "If he's so sexy, why didn't either of you go out with him?"
"He didn't ask us," I said.
"That's not a point in his favor. In fact, that proves he's a very foolish man."
"You happen to like foolish men," Kera reminded her.
Mel smiled. "You're right. When do I get to meet him?"
"Don't know," I said. "I'll have to work it out somehow."
We resumed our shopping and I soon found a pair of pants I knew both my cousins would approve of. Extra-tight and black, with ribbons of red, pink and yellow orchids sewn up the bottom left seam. I wanted them. Badly. And not because Royce thought I smelled like orchids. They were pretty, that's all. And easily removable.
"This is so cool." Kera clapped her hands, jumping up and down in a little dance. "Oh, I'm so excited for both of you. All right, girls," she said when she settled down. "We came here to shop and that's exactly what we're going to do. Now that Naomi's hormones have decided to come out and play, we need a few more items for her seduction arsenal. Let's get to work."
Later that night, I lay in bed and considered the outfits I'd purchased-one green sundress (Kera insisted), an ice-blue miniskirt with matching tank top, and a blood-red pantsuit- as well as a red lace nightie. And the black pants, of course. What would Royce do when he saw me wearing them?
Would his eyes heat like they did when he wanted to kiss me? Would he become desperate to tear the clothes off me?
The image had me aching again, hungry. I rolled to my side and stared out my bedroom window, drawing in cleansing breaths. The night sky was as black and silky as velvet, the stars tiny pinpricks of diamond light. So beautiful and peaceful. But sometimes I hated these nights alone with nothing to do but think.
I wanted to talk to Royce, to hear his sexy, seductive voice, but that was tantamount to relationship behavior so I nixed that idea immediately. I'd sleep with him, yes. Entrench him in my life and rely on him, no. I wanted to hear his voice so badly, though, that I started trembling. My blood heated, growing hotter and hotter. I moaned.
I decided to call my mom. Yes, my mom. If anything could get my mind off naked bodies and phone sex, she could. Leaning over to my nightstand, I palmed my cordless phone and quickly dialed her number. As I settled back into the covers, she answered.
"Hello?" My mom sounded grumpy and sleepy and wonderful all at once.
I smiled, feeling calmer already. "Hello to you, too."
"Naomi?" There was a pause and I pictured her jolting up.
"Is something wrong? What's wrong? I know something's wrong."
"Nothing's wrong, I swear. I just wanted to hear your voice."
"Gloria, what's going on? What's wrong?" my stepdad said in the background.
"It's Naomi. She says she's just calling to chat."
"To chat? At this hour? Something's wrong. What's wrong?"
My mom sighed. "I don't know. Give me a minute to find out."
"Fine, but I want to talk to her when you're done."
I rolled my eyes. Ah, this crazy couple could always usher me back to a sense of normalcy.
"Now, why don't you tell me what's bothering you, darling," my mom said to me. "You never call this late."
"I need your advice." The words tumbled out of me before I could stop them. "How can a girl know if a man will treat her right? If he'll be faithful to her?"
She gasped with excitement. "Are you thinking about getting married again?"
"No, nothing like that," I rushed out. "I'm just curious about how you knew Jonathan wouldn't turn out like Dad." Slap her around. Cheat on her. Verbally abuse her. How did she ever place her trust in another man's hands?
"I didn't," my mom said. "I couldn't. I could only hope."
I gasped this time. "Mom, I expected you to give me a pep talk. To tell me there's a man out there who will love me and treat me right and never cheat on me."
"You didn't let me finish. There is a man out there for you. Will he treat you right? Not always. Will he cheat? Only time can tell. Things happen and people do change." Her voice raised bitterly. "Even Jonathan and I have our problems."