When I got back to the RV, Vayl had already risen. Grumpy. His first words to me as I entered the kitchen were “I want to talk to you. Outside.”
I felt like punching something because, despite my hurt feelings, I still responded warmly (okay, hotly) to his getup. He’d dressed for the show in clothes so retro he’d have looked at home on the set ofA Christmas Carol . But the pants were just tight enough, the jacket just the right length, the shirt showed just enough chest hair that all I wanted was to slide down the wall and stare.
I followed him out the door to the water’s edge, trying not to slink guiltily, fighting the feeling that the dean had caught me smoking in the girls’ room.
“What happened today?” he demanded. “Neither Cassandra nor Bergman would give me any details.”
“I’m not surprised. You look ready to pounce.”
“I am!” He realized he’d been close to shouting and lowered his voice. “Consider this a formal debriefing. Leave nothing out. Go.”
Go? What am I, a sprinter? And what the hell with theI Spytalk? With a mounting sensation ofyou suck feeding my attitude, I gave him his damn debriefing: dream, reaver, hospital, killer pill, Xia Lai, and all.
After I’d finished he stood staring at me, one hand in the pocket of his gray slacks, the other clutching his cane so hard I expected the jewel on top to pop off at any second.
“And why do you smell like Cole?”
“Oh, we were just goofing around.” Vayl’s eyes blazed dark green with gold flecks exploding like depth charges at random intervals. “Not likethat . Like, joking.”
He started to pace, his cane making an irritatingclack! as he hit it against the seawall every other step. Also there was muttering and some very sharp gestures stopping just short of punching the air. When he whirled on me I actually jumped, which didn’t help my frame of mind. One. Bit.
“You are driving me mad!” he thundered. “Do you have no sense of restraint whatsoever?”
“You’re the one who volunteered me to strut my stuff in front of mobs of weirdos!”
“This has nothing to do with belly dancing!”
“This has everything to do with belly dancing!”In a roundabout way, but still.
“If you had not killed that reaver last night—”
“That poor man he murdered would have lost his soul!”
Vayl jabbed his cane into the concrete so hard it shivered. “You could havedied today! And how would I have learned? Perhaps the barbecue chefs would have had another fortuitous gossip session? Or maybe Cole would have mentioned it between play dates with Chinese Mother and Baby Charms-Them-All.”
“What’s your point?”
He struggled to bring his voice to maybe-they-won’t-hear-us-in-Mexico level. “I would like to wake up one evening without wondering whether or not you will be alive to greet me!”
“I am what I am, Vayl! I take risks. Sometimes that means I get hurt. Someday that means I’ll die. And I won’t come back. You’re going to have to deal with that.”
“Why should I, when you could be like me?” The words ripped out of him as if yanked by an invisible hand. He jerked, as if I’d slapped him. I’d never have had the energy. His last pronouncement had left me completely zapped. Vayl wanted to turn me? So I could hang out with him forever? I didn’t know whether to cry or puke.
“I apologize,” he said. “I had no right—”
“No. You didn’t.”
More silence. He heaved a big sigh, and I suddenly wondered if it felt extra good to him, taking a deep, sweet breath of air after not breathing the entire day before. Judging from his present stance, not so much. He’d turned his side to me so that he faced the bay and his feet were placed just right to knock one out of the park if I had one to pitch.
“The dreams.”
“Yes.”
“Without Gregory’s help . . . do you have any idea what to do next?”
“Yes.”
He turned, fully facing me in his surprise. “You do?”
“I think I need to talk to David.”
“Not over the phone, I take it.”
“Nope.”
“I want . . .” He ground his teeth together. “Would you mind doing that while I am awake? I would appreciate the chance to watch over you.”
“No problem.”
Vayl came to me, lifted a curl from my face, brushing my cheek with his fingertips as he did so. I didn’t understand why, with his powers so closely related to cold, his touch couldn’t leave me numb. No such luck. Just that slight graze of skin on skin had sent little spikes of flame rushing through my bloodstream. It took an effort not to pant.This is your boss. Who has mentally taken you through the whole human-to-vamp scenario. Where is your pride, woman? “Please believe,” he said, “no matter how much I wish it, I would never ask you to become a vampire. I do know better.”
“I should hope so!”There it is! You go, girl! At least until he touches you again!
He nodded. “But I wish you would try somewhat harder to lengthen your life.”
“Now you sound like Pete.”Oh, hey, somebody sound a gong . I’d just spotted a hint of dimple. “Look, I am good at this job, Vayl. You of all people should know that.”
“I do. I just—ever since Miami, I have been haunted by the vision of you lying limp within the Tor-al-Degan’s jaws. It has forcefully reminded me how vulnerable you are.”
Wow, how often do you really get to step outside your own selfish view? And here I thought I was the only one who still had nightmares starring that monster’s putrid scent and her bright red tentacles.
“Jaz!” Bergman yelled out the RV door. “Half an hour till show time.”
“Gotta get into my costume,” I told Vayl. I smiled brightly, pretending my stomach hadn’t just tied itself into a noose.You can do this, Jaz. No problem. Just pretend you’re back on the beach, not in a tent full of strangers.
“Are you nervous?” asked Vayl.
“No, who me? Of course not! Why would I be? Ha, ha, ha!” I skipped off to the RV, ignoring the undeniable sound of Vayl’s low chuckle behind me.
CHAPTERSEVENTEEN
Bergman had estimated our fifteen double rows of benches could comfortably hold about one hundred fifty people. Since nobody looked that relaxed, I guessed our crowd tipped the scale around two hundred.
No doubt about it,I thought as I stood waiting in the wings.My skirt’s going to fall right off. Oh God, did I remember to put on underwear? I checked.Whew! Plus the skirt’s tied on pretty tight. Oh geez. What about the top? There’s nothing tothis damn thing! What if I fall out? What if I just plain fall?
Vayl had forced me into this, the lout. I began to plot my revenge. The next time he slept I would sneak into his tent and draw a mustache on his face in red marker. I’d insist he go shopping with me and then make him stand next to a bin of panties while I tried on clothes. I’d take him to Evie’s first PTA meeting and volunteer him to serve cookies and punch.
Hey, Cole’s not a bad juggler. Bowling pins, rings, a couple of cans of tennis balls. Didn’t know he had it in him. What? Is he done already? Holy crap, it’s my turn!
Bergman switched from general lighting to a single spot and pumped up the music. I swishy swished onto the stage. The crowd greeted me with loud, prolonged applause. Now that I could no longer hide behind the curtain and obsess, I felt better. After all, I wore three tons of makeup, most of Cassandra’s traveling jewelry, and six layers of skirting, under which I’d strapped my leg holster and a sweet little .38 I usually reserved for pants-free occasions. My gold sequined top erred on the skimpy side, but rows of flat golden discs had been sewn to it so it looked less like a sports bra and more like a lets-play-banker costume. Long, sheer black sleeves covered my arms, and black lace fingerless gloves disguised the bandages on my hands.