“That would be you, Dad,” Dylan teased back. “We figured you have the most experience at giving her bad news.”
“Thanks a lot, guys. And when do you expect me to give her this little piece of news?” She had already imagined them working in their grandfather's firm, and had planned that since they were little boys. The only ones who weren't on the same page with her were Dylan and Jason.
“We thought you could tell her after you left.” Jason laughed.
“I can hardly wait. I should let you two do your own dirty work. That's part of growing up.” But in the end, he agreed. He would tell her sometime after they got home, but he decided to let her recover from the trip first. She had gotten a mild case of dysentery in the past two days, and was increasingly desperate to go home.
She looked like she was being let out of prison the day they left. It had not been her favorite trip, except for seeing her sons. She had been nervous and on edge and ill at ease the entire time. She imagined every possible kind of danger and disease lurking everywhere, and had barely been able to enjoy the sounds and smells and sights. Brad had enjoyed it for both of them, and would have loved to come back, but the boys were leaving in three months. He wished he could have come sooner, so he could have had a second trip, without Pam. It was draining having to constantly reassure her. But he was patient and sympathetic to her fears. It was a big stretch for her. She would have much preferred going to Hawaii or London or Palm Springs. Africa was just too much. Her nerves were frayed by the time she left, and she hugged the boys good-bye with obvious relief.
“Thanks for coming, Mom,” they both said with feeling. And knowing how she felt about it, they appreciated it all the more. Brad respected her for making the effort. The trip hadn't made a stronger bond between them, but it had between him and his sons. He was thrilled to have shared the time in Africa with them.
“I'll see you at home,” Pam said, with the emphasis on “home” as they all laughed.
“We'll be back by July,” they both said. They had already agreed to come home for a while, before setting off again, either to travel, or take jobs in Europe for a year. Dylan wanted to go to Australia and New Zealand. Jason was trying to talk him into a year in Brazil. In either case, they were obviously not ready to settle down.
“They need to start thinking about law school, or at least apply if they want to get into a good school,” Pam complained to Brad as they got on the plane, and he nodded. He knew it was too soon to give her the bad news. She hadn't even left Africa yet. And she looked anxious all the way back to Lusaka, where she sat miserably in the airport, with stomach cramps. She was not feeling well. But she felt better on the flight back to London, and she looked as though she had died and gone to Heaven when they arrived at Claridge's, where they were spending the night before flying home. They were going straight over the pole, and not stopping in New York, and Brad was flying home with her. As far as he was concerned, it had been a remarkable trip, and he felt like a new man. He felt as though he had conquered the world. Pam was just grateful she'd survived.
“I am not going to visit them in Brazil,” she said firmly as she climbed into the immaculate bed. She had taken a bath for an hour, and scrubbed her hair and nails. She had felt filthy for two weeks. And she felt like a queen in the enormous bed. She said goodnight to Brad then, turned off the light, and went to sleep, while Brad went to sit in the living room and read. He waited another hour until she'd fallen into a deep sleep, and then he called Faith. She answered on the second ring, and was thrilled to hear his voice. Almost as much so as he was to hear hers. The moment he heard her he wondered how he had survived for two weeks without talking to her.
“You sound great, Fred. Is everything all right?”
“Very peaceful,” she said, sounding healthy and calm. It was afternoon for her, and she'd been working on a paper in her study when he called. “How was the trip?”
“Incredible. I can't even describe it to you, it was so beautiful. I'll send you pictures. I want to go back.” She was delighted for him. She had worried about him a lot, but had to assume he was okay. She had also wondered, with silent trepidation, if it had been a second honeymoon for him and Pam. She prayed that it would be, for his sake, and an evil, selfish part of her, she told herself, hoped not.
“How were the boys?”
“Fantastic. Big and beautiful and strong, and happy. It's the best thing that ever happened to them. I wish I'd done something like that when I was their age. I wouldn't have had the balls.”
“Was it scary?” she asked, sounding impressed, and he laughed.
“I didn't think so. I don't think there's enough money in the world to pay Pam to go back. It really wasn't her trip. She slept in a little hut, and was terrified all night. And she's been sick for the last couple of days. I slept in the tent with the boys.” She liked hearing that, and then hated herself for it. She'd been praying about it for two weeks, and had gotten nowhere. She had even spoken to a priest, out of the confessional, and told him about her feelings for Brad. He had told her to pray to Saint Jude, and said that miracles occurred, which only confused her more. The only miracle she needed was to stop having the feelings she did for him. She needed to find the peaceful haven of only being his friend again. She couldn't allow herself to feel more than that, and so far, Saint Jude hadn't helped. Her heart had taken a giant leap the moment she heard his voice. She had even said rosaries about it every day, but using the beads he'd given her, it only reminded her of him. It was her greatest inner battle these days. The outer ones were about the divorce. Alex was making life miserable for her. But she was getting used to it. And she had a piece of important news for Brad.
She let him tell her all about the trip, and then she smiled broadly as she told him she had a surprise.
“Let me guess.” He concentrated, reveling in just talking to her again. There was so much he had wanted to share with her, and he couldn't remember it all now. There was too much and he was too tired. “You got all A's at school, in your exams.”
“Yes, sort of. Actually I got an A minus and an A. But that's not it.”
“Ellie apologized and figured out that her father is a shit.”
“Not yet,” Faith said, sounding briefly sad.
“I don't know. Give me a hint.” But she was too excited to stop at that. She had known for ten days, and was dying to share it with him. She and Zoe had had dinner to celebrate the previous weekend.
“I got into law school at NYU.”
“Hurray! That's fantastic. Fred, I am so proud of you!”
“Me too! Isn't that neat?”
“It's terrific. I knew you would. What about Columbia?”
“I haven't heard yet. They send out their letters next week. But I'd rather go to NYU anyway. Besides, I'm already there. And it works for me.” They talked about it for a few minutes, and she brought him up to date on the divorce. Alex was still hassling her about the house, but he had already agreed to let her stay longer while they negotiated the settlement. She didn't want spousal support from him, although she could have had it. All she wanted was the house, outright, and some of their investments. In relation to what he had, she didn't want a lot. Her mother had left her enough to get by on. And in a few years she knew she'd be getting a decent salary as an attorney. Contrary to what Eloise believed, she was asking for very little. Even her attorney thought she should get more, but that wasn't Faith's style. As Brad knew only too well, she was decent to a fault.
They talked for nearly an hour, and finally, in spite of how much he loved talking to her, he started to yawn, and she told him to go to bed. He was leaving for San Francisco at noon the next day, and would be back home by six in the evening Faith's time. “I'll call or e-mail you when I get in.”