We were enemies to the core, more so now than ever, but my loss was his. When I suffered, he suffered. It was the way we were built, and even the death that he had indirectly caused couldn’t breach that or shatter what lay between us.
Nothing could.
CHAPTER 33
I don’t know how long I sat there, but when I opened my eyes again, the sky was still dark and Seth’s presence was gone. At some point, I’d felt him ease away. I thought he had whispered something before the connection faded, but I had to be hearing things, because it couldn’t be right.
I’d thought I’d heard him say he was sorry.
Obviously I was losing my mind. Seth rarely apologized, and given his needs for power and acceptance that had driven him toward this end game, I doubted he felt remorse.
Taking a deep breath, I almost choked on the bitter remnants of smoke. I knew what I needed to do—pick myself up and get moving. Sitting out here in the open, waiting for more automatons to come along, wasn’t safe.
I stood and turned, brushing the dirt off my tactical pants. The group was still around Lea’s body. Olivia was sitting beside the fallen half-blood, her head in her hands. Deacon and Luke flanked her, the half cradling his injured arm.
Wiping my hands across my cheeks, I stopped beside Aiden.
Olivia looked up, her eyes shiny in the moonlight. “She didn’t feel it, right?”
I shook my head. “No. I don’t think so.”
She nodded, and then picked up Lea’s blade, holding it close as she stood. “What do we… what do we do from here?”
It was Solos who spoke. “We need to move quickly. There’s no telling if more will come along, and we’re sitting ducks out here.”
“Do you still think the University is a safe place?” Marcus asked, rubbing his chin. The palm of his hand came back red. I realized then he was bleeding.
I started toward Marcus, but he waved me off. “I’m okay. It’s just a scratch,” he said gruffly. “How do we know that the University is still standing? The automatons could’ve torched it and…”
And all those people. My head swam as I glanced down at Lea. Someone had closed her eyes. Mine burned.
“We have to find out.” Aiden thrust a hand through his hair. “We’re about a mile from the campus.”
Luke shook his head. “There could be more of them. Hell, there could be a dozen or more over the next damn hill and we’d be walking into that blind.”
“Or there could be nothing but open land and the damn University,” Aiden countered, his jaw set hard. “As far as we know, these automatons may’ve been here to stop anyone from reaching the campus… or to stop people from leaving.”
“Or the campus could be gone.” Deacon backed up, running his hands down his sides.
Solos stepped forward, clapping a hand on Deacon’s shoulder. “I cannot believe the whole campus is gone.”
“With all those automatons, anything is possible.” Luke straightened his injured arm as he stared in the general direction of where I assumed the campus was. “But we have to see. We’ve come this—”
“Wait!” Olivia’s voice rose above the guys’. “I wasn’t asking about going to the University or not. I was talking about what we were going to do with Lea.”
Silence fell again and I turned to Aiden. “We can’t leave her here.”
Pain flickered in those deep gray eyes. He reached out, extending his hand, and I went, pressing myself against his side. My fingers dug into his singed shirt, finding tiny burnt holes in the material. “We can’t,” I whispered.
His arm tightened around me. “I know.”
“We can’t… take her with us,” Solos said. “We have no idea what we’ll be facing.”
Olivia went off like a nuclear bomb, holding that dagger like she was considering impaling it between Solos’ eyes. “We can’t leave her here like this. That’s so wrong I don’t even need to explain.”
Sympathy shone in Solos’ scarred face. “I know, but we—”
“We bury our dead—our warriors.” Olivia’s lower lip trembled. “We don’t just leave them here to rot.”
Laadan placed a pale hand on Olivia’s arm, but Olivia was beyond consoling. “I don’t care what we have to face or what is waiting for us! We can’t just leave her here.” Her gaze swung to me. “We need to bury her.”
“With what?” Solos asked gently. “We don’t have shovels and this ground is rock hard.”
Olivia sucked in a sharp breath and turned. Her slim shoulders shook as Luke wrapped his good arm around her.
“Aiden, we have to do something,” Deacon pleaded. “I don’t know what, but something.”
Pulling away from Aiden, I glanced down at my hands. I wasn’t sure how much juice I had left in me, or even if I could use the earth element to create… to create a grave, but I would try. There was no way we could leave Lea out here.
“I don’t know if this will work.” I tucked my hair back, having no idea what’d happened to my ponytail.
Aiden’s brows slammed down as concern flared. “Are you sure you’re up to it?”
I nodded. “Where do you think we should do it, Olivia?”
It took her a couple of seconds to pull away from Luke and process what I was asking. She looked around and seemed to recognize that there really wasn’t a suitable place. She headed off and I followed her. We stopped near two juniper trees that had remained unscathed from the fire and battle, their sweet scent so at odds with the lingering acidic and metallic smells.
“This should work,” she said, clearing her throat. “It’s not much, but the trees… she’d like the trees.”
I looked at her.
Olivia slowly turned to me and she let out a choked, hoarse laugh. “Okay. Lea really wasn’t big on nature or trees.”
“No.” I smiled and it hurt. “She’s probably thinking what the hellright now.”
She blinked. “You think?”
“Yeah, I mean, when I was down there waiting, I couldn’t tell what was going on up here, but maybe it’s different for her.” I thought of the oracle I had met, and then the old woman. “It seemed different for everyone, but I know she’s not in pain.”
Olivia nodded slowly. “That’s the thing about death, I’ve realized. They’re gone to us, but not really, you know? There islife after death, just a different kind of life.” There was a pause. “I wish we’d become friends before all of this crap. Lea… she was pretty cool if you got past the bitchiness.”
I rubbed my temple, feeling an incredible empty place in my chest. “I wish I hadn’t been such a bitch to her.”
“What?”
Shaking my head, I lowered my gaze. “It’s a long story.”
Olivia looked like she wanted to push it, but didn’t. “She’ll see her family again.”
“Yeah, she wanted that.” My eyes were starting to burn again and I knew, if I let the tears fall once more, they wouldn’t stop and I’d be utterly useless. “Okay. I can do this.”
Taking a deep breath, I got down on my knees and placed my hands on the dirt. I closed my eyes, wiggling my fingers into the leaf litter until I found the topsoil. I’d made the ground move before, when I’d fought Aiden, so I imagined I could do this.
I pictured the soil loosening and giving way under my fingertips. The ground trembled slightly and my confidence bloomed. I created an image of the ground cracking open, deep—deep enough for a decent burial. In my head, the soil was darker—a rich brown—the deeper I went. Inhaling, I caught the damp, earthy scent of disturbed soil.
When I opened my eyes, the ground really was split open. Mounds of fresh dirt lay on either side of the circular six-foot hole. Seeing that it was deep enough, I sat back and wiped my shaking hands along my thighs. I felt dry inside and a little brittle. And I was definitely not going to stand anytime soon.
Everyone started doing their own part. Someone found a blanket in one of our backpacks and Lea was wrapped in it. When her body was lowered into the grave, Marcus helped me up. He handed me a bottle of water, along with the daggers I’d dropped.