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Those Shaddills were very great poop-heads indeed.

In the blink of an eye, the navy ships arranged themselves into a four-pointed pyramid with Starbiter in the middle. This was clearly a military tactic intended to intimidate me… and to place me in the middle of a crossfire if the navy chose to apply armed force. It made me angry, the way humans arrived in my home system and immediately began acting like bullies. Especially when I had done nothing wrong, and the stick-people were the true villains.

"Greetings," I said aloud, assuming my words would still be broadcast to anyone listening. "I am a sentient citizen of the League of Peoples. It is most nonsensical to gang up on me when there is a genuinely hostile vessel nearby. Seek it out and ask why it fired on us."

"You had a ship fire on you?" a voice asked. The voice was female and haughty… as if I were some vile creature who could not possibly be believed.

"Yes," I replied. "It was a ship made of sticks."

"What a shame — we must have missed the ship made of straw and the ship made of bricks." The navy woman gave a sniff of great disdain. "What kind of idiots do you think we are, Unorr? There’s nothing on our sensors, not the slightest trace of tachyon residue anywhere in this system… except the stuff from your Zarett looping around the sun. Did you think flying close to the star would hide your tracks? If so, you’re even dumber than the rest of your family."

"I am not one of the Unorrs," I said, "and I was not flying close to the sun. I was inside the sun, fleeing from the stickship."

"Oh for Christ’s sake," the navy woman growled, "if you’re going to tell lies, be believable. Inside the sun? So you’ve magically overcome Sperm-field breakdown? We’ll have to award you the Galaxy Prize for Physics… after we finish arresting you."

She took in a deep breath — the way some people do, not because they need air, but because they want you to know they intend to deliver a momentous oration. "All right, for the record: Unorr ship, I am Captain Prope of Technocracy Cruiser Jacaranda, and I order you to stand down. You are under arrest for entering a star system that was lawfully placed under total quarantine…"

She continued to speak, but I did not listen. I was too startled by the revelation that she was Festina’s foul enemy, Captain Prope. It was Prope who marooned my friend on Melaquin… and Prope whom Festina cursed on a regular basis, adding many picturesque phrases to my English vocabulary. If Prope was here, there was indeed villainy afoot. But how could I foil Prope’s dastardly schemes?

I decided to run. It angered me to act so craven I should have liked to punch Prope in the nose, while chiding her for past evil deeds — but there were four navy ships against one small Zarett, and as far as I knew, Starbiter had no weapons with which to resist arrest. Anyway, according to Uclod, these humans must have come to conceal what happened on Melaquin. Therefore, I could best defeat them by escaping to tell my story.

When I did tell my story, I would be sure to mention Prope was a most utter scoundrel who had tried to Suppress The Truth.

Starbiter, I thought, once again we must fly. I decided it was not wise to flee back into the sun — with four ships, the humans could space themselves around the star and catch us wherever we came out. Besides, I did not know how much more fiery energy our FTL field could absorb.

On the other hand, we had sopped up so much power, perhaps we could fly faster and farther than usual, like a bird who has fed well all summer and is in peak condition for migrating south. (Alternatively, we might resemble a great fat beast who had eaten so much it was only fit for sleeping off its meal… but I am such a one as prefers positive thoughts.)

Are you ready, Starbiter? I asked. I picked a direction that would take us away from the sun, scooting out through the gap between two of the navy vessels. That is our heading , I thought. Now go, go, go!

We shot forward like lightning. The humans surely must have been ready in case we made a break for it, but they were not prepared for our speed. Beams of gray-white light lanced from the navy ships toward our craft, but in the strange monochrome vision of Starbiter’s long-range sensors, the light beams traveled in slow motion. Snaky snares of energy reached out sluggishly from the bellies of all four baton-ships, but we dodged past as easily as ducking under the branches of a tree.

In a heartbeat, Starbiter darted out of the trap the humans had built around us. Something big flashed past my eyes almost too swiftly to notice… possibly Melaquin or some other planet, maybe even the stick-ship, still present but in visible to the arrogantly blind navy folk. Then there was nothing but stars; and even the sun at our back dwindled in seconds to nothing but a pinprick.

I directed Starbiter to change course five times at random to make us harder to follow — I did not know how easily the navy might track us, but surely keeping to a single straight line was imprudent. Then again, perhaps it did not matter; the four ships vanished from sight in the first instant of our escape, and I never saw them again.

7: WHEREIN I AM OFFERED A DEAL WITH THE DEVIL

You Would Not Think Annoying Persons Could Find You In Outer Space, But You Would Be Wrong

Here is a fact about space traveclass="underline" it is very very boring. I greatly enjoyed the excitement of escaping implacable foes… but once I got away, there was nothing to see but stars, stars, stars. Some of the stars were no doubt galaxies; others might have been planets, or comets, or incandescent space butterflies singing of life in the sun; but they all looked like stars, and I have seen stars before.

I wondered whether the journey would be more interesting if we slowed down — perhaps we were passing all manner of appealing space objects, but so quickly they could not be seen. However, with the human navy pursuing us, it did not seem wise to ease up even a little bit. Therefore, we hurtled through the tedious black for hour after frustrating hour, while the untwinkling stars went on and on without meaning, like one’s life when one is devoid of lofty goals… until suddenly, I heard a man clearing his throat.

"Uclod?" I called. All this time my eyes had been linked with the Zarett, unable to see my companions sitting in the chairs beside me. I had not known if they were alive or dead; and to tell the truth, I had mostly forgotten about them. The great starry sameness tended to blank my thoughts… which is not to say my brain grew Tired, I was fatigued, nothing more — and perhaps in need of solid food now that I had left the sustaining light of my Ancestral Tower. One must not let one’s heart become choked with panic over simple weariness and hunger. "Uclod?" I said much louder. "Are you finally awake, you churlish little man?"

"Nope, not Uclod. Guess again."

The voice was definitely not Uclod’s. It sounded male but had a raspy nasal quality to it: the type of voice one’s sister might adopt when saying, "Nyah, nyah, look whose bed is wet!" The words were spoken in Explorer English with a quick flat accent that cut rapidly through syllables and left them sliced in pieces on the ground.

"Who are you?" I asked. "Where are you?"

"Ooo, direct questions!" the voice said. "That’s what I like about primitive organisms: no wasting time with social niceties. No throwing yourself into postures of abject worship and offering infant sacrifices like some races I could mention. You come right out and say, ‘Who the hell are you, pal?’ "

"You are not my pal," I said. "And despite your admiration for direct questions, you have not answered mine."