“Blasphemer,” Viggo said, although the insult sounded half-hearted.
“Puritan,” Bryn shot back.
Viggo chuckled, but it was cut off. “What was Dotharr thinking, sending a woman to the general? Warriors are always men.”
Liquid was poured out of something. I could hear the rush of water as it slid through a funnel. Then the squishing of wet fabric and the dripping of excess water. The smell of herbs drifted through the air. “Now who is the blasphemer? Maybe that’s why Dotharr chose her. The best warrior is the one no one expects.”
Viggo scoffed. “She won’t last three days here.”
“I’ll take that bet,” Bryn said. “A day on the grounds and she’s already broken the rules. She has more spirit than you give her credit for.”
“Says the man tending so dutifully to her wounds,” Viggo said. “Having spirit does not mean she’s capable of completing the courses.”
“We’ll see.” A shuffle of movement, a shadow on the floor beside me, drawing near.
I lifted my head and turned to face him.
“Hello,” he said, perking up in surprise. “How are you feeling?”
“I’m awake.”
“Yes,” he said with a nod. “That’s something. You slept through the night and most of today. Your wounds have sealed. You should be developing scabs by tomorrow evening.”
“Why did you help me?” I asked. “I have nothing to give in return. You must have known that.”
Bryn smiled softly. “A very wise woman once said, ‘A world without kindness is a dark and hopeless place.’ And that isn’t the kind of world I wish to live in.”
My eyes stung with the coming of new tears.
Viggo rolled his eyes and turned to leave. “I’ll see you at dinner, Bryn.”
“Until then,” Bryn said over his shoulder. His glowing eyes fell on my face again. “What’s your name?”
“Asta.”
“I would like to hear your story, if you are willing and able to tell it, Asta.”
I rubbed my face against the blanket. “You won’t like it.”
“We are rarely fond of the truth,” Bryn said with a shrug. “Tell me anyway.”
Chapter Three
I didn’t tell him everything. Somehow, I couldn’t bring myself to. I opted for a summary of the attack on Kenshore and concluded with my arrival on Holger.
Bryn ran a hand over his face and left it over his mouth, as if he were suddenly feeling sick. “Asta, I…” He let his hand drop at last. “I don’t know what to say.”
“There’s nothing to say,” I said numbly. “My family is dead. My town is destroyed. My life is over.”
“That story is significantly different than the one General Halvar told.”
Disappointment wove around my throat like a noose. Why did I think this stranger would believe me over the renowned and respected Defender of the Rock? I shook my head and attempted to sit up. “Believe what you want. You asked for my story so I gave it.”
Bryn hastily looked away when my tattered undershirt threatened to expose my chest. I lay back down on my stomach, face burning.
He rose to rifle through the chest of drawers. Once he’d found a shirt and some trousers, he blindly held them out to me. “Here.”
“Thank you,” I said, taking the garments from him.
He turned and stared at the door. “I don’t believe you to be a liar. It’s only… General Halvar and his militia were sent with the king’s diplomats for security purposes only. They intervene if peaceful negotiations have failed and the representatives are in danger. Perhaps you don’t know the whole story.”
I eased out of my pantalets and stepped into the trousers. “My father was the mayor of our town. If General Halvar and those so-called diplomats had wanted to peacefully negotiate anything, they would have come to our border and asked for a meeting with my father. The only warning we received of their coming was the church bell tolling after the border guardsmen had already been assaulted. General Halvar and his men attacked my town without reason, murdered the men, women, and children who lived there, and proceeded to burn everything to the ground. What more is there to know?”
Bryn shook his head. “I have no answers for you. All I know is what I’ve heard since the Quest for Resources began five years ago. Nothing has been reported to make me believe the general has any malicious intent.”
I pulled the new shirt over my head, wincing at the tenderness of my back. “The general lies. The men who follow him are too terrified to expose him or are in league with him. It’s the only explanation.” I glanced at the door and cursed. “I shouldn’t have said a word. If my guards overheard any of this—”
“I dismissed them for dinner. We’re the only ones not in the Feasting Hall right now.” Bryn peeked over his shoulder at me and then turned when he saw I was dressed properly. His long face was earnest. “If you truly don’t wish to be here, Asta, I can help you. I’m planning on running away from this place soon. You could come with me.”
“And go where? And do what?” Despair made my voice crack. “There’s no other place for me but here.”
“That’s not true. You could…” Bryn struggled to come up with a plausible plan for my future.
“You said so yourself,” I murmured. “The only occupation those of us with copper eyes will ever be considered for is that of a soldier. That’s all we’re good for on the island. And since the cat-of-nine-tails didn’t finish me off—”
His eyes bulged. “You really did want to die.”
“My guards didn’t get in the way, did they?” I said with a flash of anger. “But if I jumped out my window or tried to hang myself with my sheets, they’d overhear my movements through the walls and burst in to stop me. There’s nothing sharp in my room that I could use to quietly slit my wrists and go in peace either. And now that the director knows my intent, I’ll be watched by all the security guards, not just mine.”
Bryn’s face softened. “Death shouldn’t be wished by anyone who isn’t terribly old or terminally ill. It’s wrong.”
I looked away from his kind face and squeezed my hands into fists. He can’t understand. He hasn’t lost what I have.
“Find another reason to live,” Bryn urged. “There has to be some drive within you, something you still want or need.”
Suddenly, a new goal blossomed in my mind. A need that burned away the desire for death. I would excel in this hellish academy. I would be nominated for King’s Defender. I would become the greatest, most skilled warrior anyone on this damned island had ever seen. And when the general came for my graduation, I would slaughter him and his precious king.
Bryn’s jaw dropped when he registered the new light in my eyes. “You mean to kill the general, don’t you?”
“I’ll end this acursed crusade,” I said. “If I die in my pursuit, so be it. I’ll see justice served on those who’ve wronged me.”
His face wrinkled in sympathy. “I’m sorry for what has happened to you. Truly I am. But you can’t murder the general. It isn’t right.”
I squeezed my eyes shut, fighting memories of knives biting my flesh, whips cracking against the back of my legs, and the general’s cold, dead, mismatched eyes. “Nothing that has been done to me has been right.”
Bryn held up his hands, palms forward in a gesture of surrender. “I understand, but there’s another way. You could investigate, find proof of the general’s lies, expose him to the people.”
“Be merciful?” I scoffed. “Why?”
“Because repaying violence with violence makes you no better than your enemies.”