It was almost too much for him to bear, and he quickly made for the small utility room nearby, barely making it to the wash basin before heaving up his breakfast. His head spun and his skin became cold and clammy. Were it not for the counter, he probably couldn’t have remained vertical. He stood there for several minutes, trying to pull himself together. But the guilt was still twisting his gut into knots, and making him want to vomit again, despite the fact that his stomach was empty.
“Are you alright?” a female voice came from behind him. He turned his head slightly to look at her.
“I’m fine,” he lied.
“Yeah? Well you don’t look fine. How much blood did you lose?”
“Huh?” he asked, turning to face her. She was a petite Chinese woman, young, wearing a medical uniform that was stained with blood. Her long black hair was tied back in a pony tail that had also been pulled up into an additional knot, no doubt to keep it out of the open wounds of her patients. She wasn’t even wearing the usual exam gloves that medical personnel always wore, having given up on changing them every few minutes as she jumped from patient to patient in rapid succession. She looked like she had been at it for days, even though it had been just over two hours since the first jump put them into harm’s way. But despite it all, she was still observant enough to notice his discomfort.
“Your leg,” she explained. “It’s bleeding?”
“Oh, that,” he remembered, realizing it was still throbbing. “I can wait. Besides, you’ve got plenty of patients worse off than me.”
“Are you sure?” She suddenly noticed that he out ranked her, and added, “Sir.” Then it dawned on her. “Are you here to talk to the captain?”
Hope suddenly sprung forth in Nathan’s mind. He’s still alive? And he’s conscious? Suddenly, he thought that an end might come to this nightmare called command. If the captain survived, even if was infirmed for awhile, at least he might have someone to come to for advice in the interim.
Nathan looked at the woman, noticing her blood-smeared name tag for the first time. ‘M. Chen M.D.’ “He’s alive?” he asked. “How is he, Doctor? Is he conscious? Can I speak to him?”
“Maybe, he’s in and out,” she warned. “He’s severely injured.”
“Will he make it?”
“If we can get him back to Earth, maybe. He desperately needs surgery.”
“Well can’t you do it?”
She looked at him a moment, puzzlement on her face. “I’m just a resident, not a surgeon. He needs to be taken to a properly equipped facility with a good trauma surgeon, and soon.”
Nathan’s hopes suddenly began to fall again. “I don’t think that’s an option right now.”
“Surely you sent out a distress call? It shouldn’t take more than a few hours for help to arrive from Earth, right?”
“I’m afraid you’re the only chance he’s got right now, Doctor.”
“But I’m not a surgeon. I’ve only assisted in a few minor surgical procedures so far,” she protested. “Besides, we can’t perform surgery as long as the power is out.”
Nathan hadn’t thought of that. “And if the power was restored?” he asked, “could you operate then?”
Doctor Chen looked around, thinking of how she might pull that off. “Maybe, I guess. I could have someone call out the procedures to me from the medical database to help.”
“How long has he got?”
“I don’t know, could be hours, or it could be minutes,” she admitted. “But I still don’t see why we can’t just wait for a rescue ship to come? He’ll have a much better chance if…”
“…There is no rescue ship coming!” he interrupted, frustration getting the better of him. She could tell that he was upset by their current situation. And she saw by the insignia on his uniform that he was bridge staff, so he probably knew more about their situation than she did.
“Can I see him?” he asked.
“Yes, but keep it brief,” she warned. “He’s in the corner,” she added, tilting her head to the right.
Nathan stood up straight, gathering his strength as he straightened his uniform. A few moments later, he was standing at the foot of the captain’s bed. His head was wrapped with a bandage that was soaked with blood where it covered his right eye. His right shoulder still appeared odd, and Nathan realized it was probably dislocated. He had a large, wet bandage laying over his right abdomen that was also stained with copious amounts of blood. He had several large bags of fluids hanging from the ceiling, all connected to an intravenous line that had been placed in his left arm. And there was a large bag of a synthetic blood replacement fluid connected to a tube leading to the one in his right arm. He was breathing on his own, through an oxygen mask that fogged up slightly with each exhalation. His face was swollen and puffy, and at first Nathan wasn’t even sure it was Captain Roberts.
Nathan stared at him for several minutes. He wondered what the captain would have done differently if he were still in command. Would he have killed two of his crew just to suck the boarders out into space? Would he have put the ship in further jeopardy by detonating that torpedo while they were still too close? Would he have allowed those strangers to come aboard and help repair the ship? But mostly, he wondered if the captain’s injuries had somehow been his fault as well.
He was about to leave, as the guilt was starting to make him nauseated once more, when the captain spoke.
“Lieutenant,” he whispered from behind the oxygen mask.
Nathan tried to come to attention, fighting back the nausea that was still swelling up inside him. “Yes Sir!”
“How’s my ship?” he managed to ask.
“She’s busted up pretty bad sir. But we’re still here, and repairs are underway.”
“How’s the XO?”
Nathan was afraid to answer, but knew that he had to be honest. “I’m afraid he’s dead sir.”
The captain coughed several times, which appeared to cause him much discomfort.
“Chief Patel?”
“Missing.”
“Who’s in command?”
“I’m afraid I am, sir.”
The captain flashed what looked like a smile to Nathan, but it was hard to tell with all the swelling. “Well, we’re still alive, so I guess you’re doing okay so far.”
Nathan felt his guilt swelling up again. “I don’t know about that sir,” he admitted. “I think I’ve just been lucky so far.”
“Nonsense,” the captain insisted. “You’re a natural born leader, Nathan. Just like your old man.”
The statement struck Nathan as odd. Although he was aware that the captain knew of his father, he wasn’t aware that he knew anything about him.
“Sir, I don’t know that I can do this,” Nathan admitted. The thought had been running through his mind since the moment that he assumed command. And it felt good to finally admit it to someone.
“Bullshit. Just remember, it’s not about being right and knowing all the answers. It’s about making the call.” The statement had taken a lot out of the captain, who closed his eyes for a moment to rest. Nathan thought for a second that he might have slipped back into unconsciousness, but then his eyes opened again, slowly. “Nathan, take the bars from my uniform.”
Nathan looked around, finally spotting the captain’s cut-up uniform shirt laying on the counter behind him. He picked it up and carefully removed the blood stained bars. He was about to hand them to the captain, when he realized his intentions.
“Put them on,” he ordered softly from behind the oxygen mask.
Nathan reluctantly replaced his lieutenant’s bars with the captain’s bars.
“I hereby order you to assume command of the Aurora, effective immediately.”
Nathan looked down at the floor, unable to look the captain in the eye. He didn’t want the captain to see the fear in his eyes. The fear for his captain’s fate, the fear for his own fate, and most of all, his fear of command. After a few moments, he managed to raise his eyes to meet those of his dying captain, stiffening and offering a salute.