‘Carl,’ she began, ‘what exactly are you doing? And please don’t insult my intelligence by telling me it’s nothing when it’s bloody obvious that it’s not.’
He continued to ignore her.
Emma noticed that there was a well-packed rucksack resting against a wall in the store room adjacent to the kitchen.
‘Where are you thinking of going?’ she asked.
Still no response.
The kettle began to boil. Emma made a cup of coffee for herself and one for Michael. She sipped at her scalding hot drink and looked directly at Carl over the brim of her mug.
‘Where are you going to go?’ she asked again, her voice deliberately low and calm.
Carl turned his back to her and leant against the nearest kitchen unit.
‘I don’t know,’ he eventually replied. Emma guessed that he was lying. It was obvious that although he feigned nonchalance, he knew exactly where he was going and what he was planning to do.
‘Come on,’ she sighed, growing tired. ‘Do you really expect me to believe that?’
‘Believe what you want,’ he snapped. ‘Doesn’t matter to me.’
‘You can’t leave the house, it’s too dangerous. Bloody hell, you saw how many of those things managed to get here last night. If you really think that you…’
‘That’s the whole fucking problem, isn’t it?’ he said, finally turning round to face her. ‘I saw how many bodies were here last night – too bloody many. It’s not safe to stay here anymore.’
‘It’s not safe anywhere these days. Face it, Carl, this place is as good as you’re going to get.’
‘No it isn’t,’ he argued. ‘We’re out on a limb here. There’s nowhere to run. If that fence comes down we’re completely fucked…’
‘But can’t you see that we can get over that? When they’re here in large numbers we just shut up and sit tight. If we stay silent and out of sight for long enough they’ll disappear.’
‘And is that what you want? Are you happy to sit and hide for hours every time those bloody things get close? They’re getting stronger everyday and it won’t be long before…’
‘Of course it’s not ideal, but what’s the alternative?’
‘The alternative is to go back home. I know Northwich like the back of my hand and I know that there are other survivors there. I think I’ll have more of a chance back in the city. It was a mistake coming out here.’
Emma struggled to comprehend what she was hearing.
‘Are you fucking crazy?’ she stammered. ‘Do you know the risks you’d be taking by…’
‘Emma, I’m going. If you haven’t got anything constructive to say then do me a favour and don’t say anything at all.’
‘But have you thought this through? Do you really believe this is the right thing to do?’
‘There’s safety in numbers,’ he said, turning his back on her again. ‘Those bloody things proved it last night, didn’t they? More survivors has got to equal more of a chance in my book…’
‘You’re wrong,’ Michael interrupted. He was standing in the kitchen doorway. Neither Emma or Carl knew how long he’d been there or how much he’d heard. He leant against the door frame with his arms crossed in front of him.
Carl shook his head.
‘Leaving here would be a fucking stupid thing to do,’ Michael added.
‘Staying here seems like a fucking stupid thing to do too,’ he snapped back.
Michael took a deep breath and walked further into the kitchen. He sat on the edge of the kitchen table and watched the other man as he tried desperately to busy himself and avoid eye contact with the other two survivors.
‘Convince me,’ Michael said as he took his coffee from Emma. ‘Just how much have you thought about this?’
For a second Carl was angry, feeling that Michael was patronising him. But then he decided that he sounded as if he was at least going to listen to what he had to say.
‘I’ve thought long and hard about it,’ he replied, ‘this isn’t something that I’ve just decided to do on a whim.’
‘So what’s your plan?’
‘Get back to Northwich and try and get to the community centre. See who’s still there…’
‘And then?’
‘And then find somewhere secure to base myself.’
‘But you said you didn’t want to lock yourself away and hide. Aren’t you just going to be doing that somewhere else instead of here?’ Emma asked.
‘There’s a council works depot between the community centre and where I used to live. There’s a bloody ten foot wall right the way around it. Once we’re in there we’re safe. There’s trucks and all kinds of things there.’
‘How you going to get in?’
‘I’ll get in.’
‘And what if there’s no-one at the Community Centre?’
‘I’ll keep going to the depot on my own.’
Michael stopped asking questions and sat and thought for a few seconds.
‘So when were you thinking of going?’ he wondered.
‘We’ve got to go out for supplies at some point in the next few days,’ Carl answered. ‘I figured I’d try and get some transport while we were away from the house and then I’ll take it from there.’
‘We could go and get supplies today,’ Michael said, surprising Emma who looked at him with an expression of utter disbelief on her face.
‘What the hell are you doing?’ she hissed at him. ‘Christ, are you thinking of going too?’
Michael shook his head.
‘Seems to me that you’re going to go whatever we try and say or do to stop you.’
Carl nodded.
‘I’d go now if I could.’
‘Then there doesn’t seem to be any point in Emma or I wasting our time trying to convince you that you’re making a mistake.’
‘I don’t think I am. You are right though, you’d be wasting your time.’
‘And if we try and stop you leaving we’ll probably end up beating the crap out of each other and the net result will still be that you leave. Am I right?’
‘You’re right.’
He turned to face Emma.
‘So we don’t have a lot of choice, do we?’
‘But, Mike, he’ll end up dead. He won’t last five minutes out there.’
Michael sighed and watched Carl disappear into the store room.
‘That’s not our problem,’ he said. ‘Our priority is to keep ourselves safe, and if that means that Carl leaves then Carl leaves. Think of him as a homing pigeon. We send him on his way today and, with a little luck, if things don’t work out he’ll bring the rest of the survivors from Northwich back here with him if he manages to find them.’
Emma nodded. She understood everything he said but still found it hard to accept.
‘He’s a stupid fucking idiot,’ she hissed under her breath.
33
Once it had been accepted that Carl’s leaving for the city was inevitable the survivors quickly forced themselves into action. He was keen to get away as quickly as he could and Michael and Emma were keen to make the most of having him around. A trip away from the house was essential to all of them whether they were staying or going. Having three pairs of hands instead of two meant that theoretically Michael and Emma could collect more supplies and so defer their next excursion for a few precious days and hours longer.
On a cold and wet Sunday morning they returned to Pennmyre, the first place they had visited after stumbling upon Penn Farm last week. The tension in the van rose quickly as they approached the main street of the village. It came as no surprise that as the sound of the engine shattered the fragile silence, the unwanted interest of scores of deplorable creatures nearby was aroused. Too afraid to move at first for fear of being swallowed up by the diseased crowds that had quickly gathered all around them, Emma, Michael and Carl were forced to wait for over an hour in the back of their battered vehicle, crouching silently on the floor, hidden under blankets and coats until the bodies had drifted away.