It didn’t give me hope.
Just the opposite.
My heart broke the closer we got to the hospital. She had been alone for so long.
I was probably too late.
Chapter Twenty-Three - Leah
At least it was over.
My fingers trembled as I redressed, tugging the tank over my head and wishing I had worn something other than the pink sweatpants proudly proclaiming “Sweet” over my butt.
My heart still raced. I didn’t think it’d ever slow. More tears fell over my cheeks. The nurses handed me a handful of tissues as they retrieved the discharge forms. It didn’t help.
I needed Jack.
I sat on the bed as the shouting rang from in the hall. It wasn’t polite, but I didn’t expect him to be. My knight-in-shining armor crashed through a damn hospital as aggressively and unsubtly as he could. Thank God no cameras were here to see this.
I was so glad to hear his voice, even if it echoed a nasty curse at the head nurse who refused to give him my room number. I pulled my cell and made a note to send a basket of various Rivets’ paraphernalia to the patient staff forced to deal with Jack Carson’s latest temper tantrum.
Jack sprinted into the room, limping heavily on his leg. He didn’t slow until I was safe in his arms.
I fell into his embrace, and he kissed me furiously, a silent apology that shook me to my core. I clung to him, finally warm and calm. He pulled away only so he could look at me, his words heavy, solemn, and brimming with the same fear I felt a few minutes ago.
“I’m so sorry,” he whispered. “I got your message…and I tried…but I was…”
“It’s okay.”
“Are you?” His voice broke. He lowered his hand as if he were afraid to touch my tummy. “Is the…”
“Everything’s okay.”
Jack’s eyes widened, a surge of blue so bright it startled me. He stared as if I would lie to the only man I’ve ever loved.
He exhaled. “It’s okay?”
“Yeah.”
“But you were—”
“Overreacting?” I bit my lip. “It’s…unusual for me, I’ll grant you that.”
“What happened?”
“Women can experience something called round ligament pain. It’s a muscle ache when their womb is growing for the baby.” I swallowed. “For example, if they’re expanding for the very large son of a very large quarterback.”
Now Jack looked faint. I guided him to the bed, taking his hand and pressing it against my tummy. He opened his mouth to speak, couldn’t, and collapsed backward instead. I laughed, letting him have a moment while the news overwhelmed him.
“A son?” he asked.
“They had a good shot on the sonogram tonight, but it’s still very early. We’ll have to check again in a couple weeks.”
“Do you think…it’s a boy?”
“I think he’s a boy.”
“And he’s okay? You’re not…hurting?”
“I’m just a little embarrassed.”
Jack pulled himself upright with a core strength I envied now. He shook his head, pulling me close for another kiss.
“Never. Don’t you dare say you were embarrassed. Fuck, I’ve donated enough money to this place. There should be a whole wing I can use. I could keep you here with all the doctors and nurses and staff until we’re absolutely sure—”
“I’m sure your donations are better allocated to the kids in pediatrics,” I said. “I had some discomfort when I stood and walked, but it’s perfectly normal, if not thoroughly frightening for a first time mom. The doctors said to keep an eye on it.”
“Two of them,” he promised. “You can sleep. I won’t. Not until that baby is born and safe and—”
“Jack.” I smiled. “I’m okay. You’ll be the first to know if there’s any problem.”
“Damn right I’ll be.” Jack sat me on the bed so he could pace instead. His steps hit the floor too hard, and I didn’t even want to imagine the damage he did to himself by running through the halls.
I sighed. “Stop. I’m not sending you downstairs to get an MRI if you tear up your knee.”
“I’ll cut the damn thing off.”
“You might find it a little hard to play football on one leg.” I shrugged. “You’re a big guy, Jack, but even your tripod can’t get you out of a blitz.”
“I’m serious, Kiss.”
“And everything’s okay. I’m just waiting for the papers that tell me that I overreacted.”
“You didn’t overreact.” His voice hollowed. “You didn’t have anyone there to help you.”
“I can handle myself.”
“You shouldn’t have to.”
“Even if you were there, nothing would have changed.”
He didn’t believe me. “That’s not true—”
“I wouldn’t have risked anything. We’d have gone to the hospital, only you would have driven me.”
“Yeah.” He beat at his chest with a fist. “I would have taken you. I’d have been there. I’d have kept you safe and calm and helped you. But I wasn’t there.”
No, he wasn’t, and I didn’t care. I was okay. He was okay.
Our son was okay.
That was the single greatest news anyone had ever given me.
“I’m not holding it against you,” I said.
Jack steadied, though he seemed to grow, every inch of his body raging and tensed and prepared for a battle he could never win against his own regret.
“I’ll hold it against me.”
“Jack—”
“Leah, I’m in love with you.”
I dropped onto the bed. Jack knelt before me, and I was really going to need my hand back to cover the gasp that puffed past my lips. He held my palm, both of them, and kissed. His gaze locked on mine. I believed every word he spoke.
“I love you,” he said. “I was an idiot. I didn’t know what to do because of the injury, and I took it out on you. I was wrong.”
“You love me?”
“I went to the party because I thought it would make me happy. Like it always used to do.”
My mouth dried. “You love me.”
“They had drinks. And they had girls. And three of them were just in my lap.”
Not the detail to include in this apology. I lowered my voice. “But you love me?”
“I didn’t want them. I kept thinking about you. I left you so angry and hurt. Fuck, I was stupid. I didn’t see what I had.” He squeezed my hands. “You don’t think I’m responsible. You don’t think you can depend on me. You’re probably right, but I’m gonna work on it. I’m going to be there for you, for the baby, for us.”
“You love me.”
Jack nodded. “You’re the only woman I’ve ever loved. You’re the only woman who could make me love someone other than myself. I’m so sorry for ever making you think otherwise.”
The exhaustion and hormones got to me before his words, but now I was a weeping mess. I sniffled, holding onto his shoulder while I stared at my unbelievable man.
“You know me…” I whispered. “I have a plan for everything. I know what to do, what to say, how to react. I can prevent any sort of disaster.”
“I’m a disaster now?” Jack grinned.
“The worst kind.” I touched his cheek. “I have no idea what to do when I’m around you. There’s no plan that can guard my heart. I’d have to leave you to protect myself from everything I feel—and, Jack, if I had to spend another moment separated from you, I might’ve lost myself.”
“But I’m here,” he said.
“You’re here. And you have no idea how much you mean to me. You asked me what I thought of you? It’s simple. You’re my world. You are everything I could ever, possibly want in this lifetime.”
His smile warmed me, chased away the fears and stress. “You love me.”
“I love you. How’s that for a headline?”
“Respectable, Amazing Woman Falls For Idiot Trouble-Maker.”
“We can spin it to be something more positive. That’s why you pay me the big bucks.”