“Why are you the only one who understands?” She swallowed. “Why are you the only one who even tries to understand?”
“Because I know what it’s like to have everything but still lose the one you want.”
Shay quieted. I thought I blew it. It sounded romantic in my head, but what the hell did I know? There was still too much shrapnel, swelling, and half of the desert rattling around my brain for me to make sense of most things.
I should have spelled it out for her. Laid it all out and waited for the rejection.
But I always did like torturing myself. Kicking my own ass meant I was getting stronger. Worked in the weight room, on the battlefield, and in the bedroom.
I didn’t have to say a damn thing. Shay reached for me, her delicate fingers stroking over my cheek. She leaned in, gentle, and kissed me.
Goddamn, those lips. With a single nibble to my bottom lip, Shay might have asked me to burn down the damn estate, and I’d have agreed with the flick of my tongue against hers. My cock throbbed for her. I shifted in my jeans, but that gave it room to get harder.
I wanted this fucking woman.
I wanted everything about her. The pouty lips. Those hidden curves under the robe. Her body. Her heat.
Her dreams. Her secrets. Her every vulnerable thought.
And, in return? I’d be the one there for her. Her douche-bag friends or absent father would never hurt her again. I’d comfort her. Hold her. Kiss her.
Until I shipped back out.
Holy Christ.
I spent two months in the hospital and six in therapy. Every damned second of my recovery was spent forcing myself to take the next step, add the next weight, and meet the next challenge.
I never had a reason to stay that could compete with my desire to go.
Until her.
Shay stood. I curled my fingers in the comforter so I wouldn’t throw her onto the bed. She tickled the knot of her belt.
The silk opened.
Fell away.
And she stood before me in perfect, goddess-like perfection.
Dark. Sensual. Curvy and feminine and absolutely utterly beautiful, from the ebony curls of her hair to the swell of her breasts and the hidden treasure tucked between her thighs. She let the robe drop to the ground and turned. Her firm ass brought a man to his knees quicker than a gun slammed into the back of the head.
She escaped into the bathroom. I stared after her, my heart punching a hole in my chest.
The water started again. Her voice echoed from the tub.
“Zach?” Her words were a light tease. “Are you coming in or not?”
Chapter Sixteen - Shay
Heading to campus sucked.
Just plain sucked.
That’s why I didn’t do it alone.
Zach didn’t know how much it meant for him to tag along. Unfortunately, he decided to cheer me up on the back of his Harley. In a history of bad ideas, crawling onto a two-wheeled monstrosity driven by a guy named Hard might have been my most dangerous adventure. It still wasn’t my worst idea, but if I cracked my skull off the asphalt or swallowed just one bug, so help me God…
“Are you sure this thing is safe?” I bit my nail. Zach fit a helmet over my head. The dimples flashed. He thought my reluctance was hilarious. “I’m really not brave enough for this.”
“It’s fine. Once you hop out of a helo in hostile territory under enemy fire, a little bike ride seems pretty relaxing.” Zach wore a pair of sunglasses. Aviator. Like he tried to be the cliché soldier. It worked. “Still, I’d rather tour Afghanistan on the bike than take I-75.”
“You think you’re so cute.”
“So do you.”
I wasn’t answering that. He had to work for it. And, knowing Zach? He would.
Eagerly. Like a little boy in a candy store.
“Come on. I’ll ride you to the campus, then we’ll get lunch.”
I secured my backpack and triple checked it wouldn’t spill my life onto the highway. “Lunch?”
“That okay?”
He said it so casually.
Sure, I made a scene when I invited him into my bathtub. And yes, he fulfilled his promise when I finally granted him entry into the master bedroom. But lunch?
Somehow that changed our arrangement to something…different. Good different, but still confusing and exposed. My emotions blended into a weird cocktail of Zach and went straight to my head.
Really, lunch was where our relationship should have began. I went from leaping into bed with him to hating his guts and back again. That emotional whiplash hadn’t stopped for small-talk, baby pictures, or embarrassing stories about our prior relationships.
Had we done it right, I would have started by smiling at him over a menu, flirting by biting a straw, and then excusing myself from the table so he could watch my ass sway. Now we were a couple sways too late for that. Probably a few bounces, spanks, and wiggles too.
Zach shifted his long legs over the motorcycle. He patted behind him.
“Better hang on tight,” he said. “You know. Like last night.”
I smacked him through the helmet, picking a path over the coiled parts and chrome finish. I awkwardly fit onto the seat. I had no choice but to cling to Zach. The bike angled, and my waist ground against his back.
Just what we needed while flying down the highway at sixty miles an hour.
Zach patted my knee and pulled my arms over him.
“Lean when I lean. I won’t let anything happen to you.”
Yeah, and Eve trusted the serpent too.
The bike rumbled under us. The first few turns I screeched instead of leaned, but Zach’s heated laugh warmed me. I focused on his movements. By the time we reached the highway I had enough confidence to open my eyes. I clung to his broad shoulders and let the morning wash over us.
A motorcycle. A SEAL. Zach even made baking a pie sexy. I fought to not fall head-over-heels for him if only so I wouldn’t tumble from the bike.
The bag rested heavy on my shoulders. I brought my schedule, my information, and a formal letter of withdrawal. I managed to not cry when typing it up. Printing the document was another story. That emotional breakdown ended with streaked lines, broken toner, and half a package of Oreos to soothe me.
My goal in life.
Gone.
Hell reserved a special circle for horrible professors. The ones who promised to grade on a curve and didn’t. Those who never graded their tests and only posted scores the day before finals. The absent-minded flakes who forgot to assign homework in class and instead emailed the assignment the night before it was due.
The cruel monsters who crushed innocent students trying to get ahead.
I didn’t care about the money I lost in tuition, just how hard I busted my ass to get on the Dean’s List. All that wasted time. Then again, what did time matter to me? It wasn’t like I was in a hurry to find a job and make money. I’d transfer to another school, take my classes, and then do student teaching with a saner advisor.
And I had to prepare to do it alone.
My friends weren’t in a chatty mood after I stormed out of dinner—especially as the forty dollars I tossed on the table didn’t cover all their meals. And Zach…
Zach wouldn’t be hanging around either. My heart ached. I’d actually miss my nuisance house guest when he re-enlisted in the SEALs.
Though I’d rather lose him to a deployment than anything worse.
I didn’t want to imagine something bad happening to him.
I gripped him harder. He didn’t seem to notice—the bastard was too busy accelerating, splitting a lane between two cars and edging onto the exit ramp. I pinched my eyes shut and clung to him as the bike roared over the road.
He didn’t just get off picking up pretty girls from bars. He was a pure adrenaline junkie. No wonder he wanted in the SEALs. He acted like a total idiot as a civilian.
We cruised to the campus and parked outside the administration offices. I hobbled off and handed him my helmet.
“Want me to come in with you?” He asked.
Escort me through this hostile territory? Not without a polo shirt as camouflage, his gun exchanged for a laptop bag, and his radio swapped for Beats headphones. I shook my head.