“Okay.”
“And then I told him how sorry I was that his wife was not well. And you know what he did then?”
“No. What did he do then?”
“He started laughing. So hard that he started choking. He thought that was a very funny thing for me to say.”
“So his wife’s not sick after all?”
“Kenny doesn’t have a wife,” Sarah said. “But he does have a companion.”
“A who?”
“Kenny said he couldn’t believe you didn’t know that he wasn’t exactly the marrying kind. He said he lives with a man named Gary, and that Gary is very well, thank you very much.”
This was enough to make me forget all the events that had transpired in the last couple of hours. “Kenny’s gay?”
“Evidently.”
“No shit. Kenny’s gay?”
“I don’t really think that’s the issue here,” Sarah said.
“How long I been going to that store? Eight, ten years, maybe? Way before we moved out here. You’d think maybe in all that time I’d have learned to read the signals.”
“You’ve missed plenty of others before.”
“I’d never have guessed. But now that you mention it, he never has talked about a wife or kids or-”
I knew instantly I’d made a blunder. “So,” Sarah said, “he’s never mentioned a wife. Yet if I’m to believe anything you say, not only does he have one, but she’s under the weather.”
“Sarah, listen, I know I may have seemed a bit odd tonight.”
“Gee, I hadn’t noticed.”
“It’s kind of hard for me to explain right now. I just have a few things I have to attend to, but, listen, it’s not like I’m having an affair or anything.”
In some households, mentioning the word “affair” might be enough to raise suspicions, start an argument, make someone burst into tears. Sarah reacted differently to the suggestion that I might be seeing someone else.
She began to laugh.
“Why is that so funny?” I asked.
She smiled. “You having an affair. Of all the people I’d suspect of having an affair, you’d be the last. You know why?”
“Why?”
“Because you’d have too guilty a conscience. When you’ve done something wrong, you can’t hide it. It shows in your face. You get kind of flushed, you perspire. I can spot these things.”
I shot a sideways glance into our dresser mirror. I looked warm. Sweaty, even.
“No,” Sarah said, regaining her composure. “I think I’ve got it figured out. I know what’s going on.”
“You do.”
“Yep.”
“What is it you think is going on?”
She approached me and smiled. “I think maybe, just this once, for the first time since we’ve been married, you’ve actually remembered my birthday and decided to do something special about it.”
I tried to smile as Sarah slipped her arms around my waist. “That is what’s going on, isn’t it?”
I locked my arms around her and she pressed herself into me. “It’s never very easy to pull one over on you,” I said.
“You’ve been running all over the place. When I was at the market, after we got home. What are you up to?” She turned her head up toward mine and breathed on my neck. Her hands were moving from behind my waist and settling on my butt.
“I really can’t tell you now,” I said, my mouth on her ear. “I want it to be a surprise.”
She grinned, and moved her mouth onto mine. She darted her tongue in a couple of times, then pulled away. “Go close the door,” she said.
“Aren’t there kids in the house?” I said. I needed an excuse not to go through with this. I was a bit concerned, what with all the things currently occupying my thoughts, that I might not quite be up to what Sarah had in mind.
“They still haven’t come back from McDonald’s,” she said. “We’ll hear them come in.”
“I don’t know,” I said. “Maybe we should wait till later.”
“I don’t think so,” she said, unbuttoning the top of her jeans and slipping onto the bed next to a pile of rolled socks and clean towels. “Close the door.”
I went around the bed and pushed the door closed. Then Sarah reached up for me, pulled me down onto the bed, undid my belt buckle and the top of my jeans.
“Really, hon, I think they might come home any moment.”
“What do you think of Trixie?” Sarah asked.
“Trixie? What about Trixie?”
“There’s something about her. She’s very sexy, don’t you think?”
“I don’t know. I never really noticed, I suppose. We’ve just had coffee a couple of times.” I had nothing to feel guilty about where Trixie was concerned, but under pressure I might confess to anything right about now.
Sarah pulled back and looked at me. “What’s with you? This isn’t an interrogation. All I’m saying is, there’s something about her, more than meets the eye. Did you catch that thing she said, about Catwoman? How she liked her outfit?”
“I don’t know. I don’t think I remember.”
Sarah smiled at me, slipped her hand down into my jeans. “How would you like it if I got a Catwoman outfit?”
“Well,” I said, aware that I was not responding to Sarah’s touch the way I normally did, “it would probably be very hot. There’d be chafing. A lot of chafing.”
Now Sarah had noticed that her touch was not producing the desired effect. “Is somebody sleepy?” she asked.
“Maybe,” I said. “I think he’s got a lot on his mind.”
Sarah pulled out her hand, rested it on my shoulder. “Is everything okay?”
“Sure, yeah. Everything’s fine.”
Sarah suddenly became very positive, like she was putting the best spin on a bad lab result. “It’s perfectly normal, you know. It happens. I wouldn’t worry at all. Like you say, you’ve had a lot on your mind, finishing up your book, and, you know, at your age, sometimes something like this is going to happen.”
“I don’t think this is an age thing.”
“I didn’t mean that. I’m just saying, that when you’re in your forties, and you’re tired, you know, this can happen.” But now her face was changing. Instead of worrying about me, she was thinking about herself. “Unless it’s me. Unless I don’t, I don’t know, please you the way I used to.”
“Believe me,” I said, “that is not the case. It’s what you said. I’m tired, and stressed out, and old. Very old.”
Sarah sat up on the edge of the bed. “I guess I was trying to sneak in a quickie because, well, there was another phone call.”
“What?” Oh God. Was this how it felt to jump out of a plane and then realize you’d forgotten your chute? Who could have called? Homicide investigators? The Mounties? The FBI? Agent Mulder?
“Work. I have to go in tonight.”
“You’re kidding.”
“The overnight assignment guy’s off sick. I’m going to have to cover it. I can’t believe it. If I’d known, I’d have had a nap as soon as I got home. I don’t know how the hell I’m going to stay awake.”
“What about tomorrow morning? You have to stay and do a double?”
“No, they’ll get someone else to do that. I’ll probably get home about 8 A.M., unless they can get someone to relieve me sooner, which I doubt. Don’t bother making me any coffee in the morning. I won’t want to stay awake then, I’ll just crash, sleep till noon or one, and I won’t have to go in the rest of the day.” She chuckled. “In a way, it’s like getting tomorrow off.”
“It’s a hard way to get it.”
She shrugged. Sarah had, some time ago, worked midnight shifts for five years on the city desk. This was after we’d had children, otherwise they might never have happened. But she had gotten used to it, so the odd night here and there wasn’t such a big deal to her.
She gave me a quick kiss. “I’ve gotta freshen up before I go in. But we’re going to talk more about this tomorrow. Maybe we need a dirty weekend. Get away for a couple of days. I think we owe that to ourselves.” Sarah disappeared into the bathroom. I zipped up, went downstairs and met Angie coming into the house. Just as I’d feared, I’d never heard her or Paul come back.