“Tell me what you want,” he breathes against my breasts as he starts planting soft kisses down the swell and over my nipple, tightening it to a stiff peak.
“This.”
“Tell me,” he urges.
“Just this. I just need to feel you inside of me right now,” I respond, giving him my honest words, because I desperately need to be as close to him as possible right now.
“I am inside of you,” he says, loosening his arms and slipping his hand between our bodies, resting it on my stomach. “This is me inside of you.”
My eyes well as I nod, needing to believe that it is a part of him growing inside of me and not Bennett or Pike. I want it to be him because all I want is simply him. My tears fall as I gaze into his beautiful, green eyes. Eyes filled with adoration for me and I adore him just as much. I love him. And now I’m doubting everything because all I can see are the rolling hills of Scotland, a nineteenth-century estate, and Declan with our baby in his arms.
The pain of what it would mean to destroy everything good in this man and turn him into a murderer for the sake of this sick game Pike and I schemed up shreds my heart. I tried to stay focused, I tried to shut myself off from feeling anything towards Declan, I tried to stick to the plan. But I can’t do it. This isn’t a game; this is a man’s life. A good man’s life. A man that I deeply love.
I can’t ruin him and turn him into a monster. If sparing Bennett’s life, even though I want him to suffer for what he did to my life, means that Declan’s life won’t be destroyed, I’ll do it.
Killing Bennett isn’t worth sacrificing Declan.
My tears grow, spilling over and down my face as I whisper, “I love you. All I want is you. You and me and this baby.”
His cock thickens inside of me with each word I speak, but he doesn’t urge me to move as we remain connected, locked together intimately. I know what I must do, and it won’t be easy. Pike has given up so much these past few years while I’ve been married to Bennett. But I can’t do it. I won’t do that to Declan. Truth is, I don’t have to kill Bennett to get my fairytale—my second chance—because that fairytale is right here in my arms. This is the happiness I’ve been missing all my life.
So I’ll go to Pike and tell him it’s over. Tell him I’ll play it out, divorce Bennett, and fold my cards. I’ll live the rest of my life as Nina, the girl from Kansas, if that means I won’t lose Declan. I’ll bury my past.
“I want to own every part of you,” he groans as his eyes flare in heat, his fingers pressing into my skin as he grips my ass.
“You already do.”
“Grab my shoulders and move,” he commands, and I obey, lifting up along the shaft of his cock before gliding back down.
I continue to work the length of him, my pussy snug around him, gripping him in needy ecstasy as the water laps around our bodies. He handles one of my breasts in his hand, tugging on my hardened nipple as he drags his tongue over my other breast before fiercely sucking me into his mouth. With his teeth bared, he scrapes them along the delicate skin and then bites down with force. Screaming out in a seething aura of pleasure and pain, I ride his cock, rolling my hips over him. The warm water swirls over my swollen clit with each of my thrusts, driving me towards my peak.
Declan continues to work my tits, laving me with his tongue, feasting like I’m his last meal and he needs me to survive. He then grabs my hips, jerking me to pound against him as he shoves his cock deeper inside of me, hitting that bundle of nerves that only he’s done, and I can’t hold on. Dropping my head back, he quickly finds my hand, interlacing our fingers and squeezing it tightly. I pulse and spasm around him as the colorless light of my exploding orgasm blinds me. When I writhe against him, he wraps his free arm around my waist and roughly pins my body down over his cock. He throbs inside of me, growing and contracting with each pump of cum he shoots inside of me.
“Fuck,” he moans in a sensual brute as we both come together.
Holding me close to him, my body begins to tremble in fiery aftershocks. I’m wrapped all around Declan when he eventually pulls his head back. Our breaths are erratic and labored as we try to find our way back down.
In a staggered voice, Declan pants, “I want to make you into everything you’ve ever dreamed of being.”
And with those words, I don’t need any convincing.
Fuck Bennett.
Fuck the revenge.
Fuck it all.
I have everything I’ll ever want right here inside of this beautiful man.
I HAVEN’T GONE to see Pike yet. I know I have to, but I’ve been afraid about how he’s going to react to the news that I want out of this. Bennett has been back in town for the past few days, and I find myself caring less and less about playing his wife. For me, it’s over, but I feel I can’t walk out until I talk to Pike.
I’ve seen Declan every day since Bennett has returned, and to say he’s growing impatient with me is a severe understatement. My excuses are wearing thin, so I finish getting ready to drive out and tell Pike the new plan—the plan that will, for the first time, leave him without me by his side.
The guilt is insurmountable at this point. How do you tell the man, who is probably in love with you, and the one who has been your protector for the past twenty years, that it’s no longer the two of you? That you’ve fallen in love and want to be with that other person? Pike and I have always been together, always honest with each other, until now. I told him I didn’t love Declan, but I knew he could see right through me. See deeper than even I could at that point. I knew I cared for Declan, that he was a friend that I was being drawn to, but I hadn’t yet realized that I had already fallen for him. Pike already knew though; that’s how connected we are.
The house phone rings as I throw on my sweater, and when I answer, it’s Manuel from downstairs.
“Mrs. Vanderwal, I’m sorry to disturb you, but there’s a gentleman here saying he’s a cousin of yours.”
“What?” I question, wondering who the hell is down there, and then I hear the unmistakable voice of Pike, arguing, “Dude, just let me go up.”
“Yes, please, Manuel,” I quickly interject as rampant fear streaks through me. “Go ahead and send him up.”
My nerves crash, confounded as to why the hell Pike would come here. Never has he come here. We agreed from the start that our paths would never cross outside of Justice, so as I pace the foyer, waiting for his knock, I try to grapple with my thoughts and compose myself, all the while knowing what I must tell him.
When the knock comes, I open the door, grab his arm, and yank him inside, snapping, “What the fuck are you doing here?”
But his eyes don’t meet mine, instead they scan around the room, taking in my home of the past four years. “Holy shit,” he murmurs. “So this is where you’ve been while I’m rotting away in that shit tank?”
“Pike, what are you doing here? Are you crazy? What if Bennett was home?”
“Relax, Elizabeth. I’ve been sitting outside all morning waiting for that shit-stain to leave,” he says, walking past me and into the dining room. “So . . .” he starts, letting the word linger as he drags a finger down the length of the cherry wood dining table, “. . . where the fuck have you been for the past month?” His words scrape out in frustration.
“I-I’m sorry. I ju—”
“Cut the shit. You told me Bennett was going to be out of town this past week, yet you never once came by to see me. Why is that?”
“Pike, please,” I say on a shaky voice as chills run down my trembling arms, scared shitless with what I’m about to reveal.
“Please? What the fuck is going on with you, Elizabeth?!” he shouts, his voice booming through the open space as he slams his fist against the table. “You used to run to me the second Bennett left, you used to beg for my dick, but now, when you do finally decide to show your face, you rush out the door.”