Ross has supported me all the way as well. He even came to the official opening of ‘Indi Ink’. I had no idea he was coming. He never said a word about what I’d named the shop. To this day I still wonder if he knows I named it after his daughter. I guess it’s pretty fucking obvious that I did.
I can’t describe what I felt when he walked through the door that night. It blew my fucking mind. I’m so thankful that he gives a shit. He’s the only male in my life that ever has. He’s told me numerous times how proud he is of me. I fucking love him for that. As far as I know, Indi and my mum have no idea that we’ve stayed in contact all these years.
My mum and I talk on the phone regularly, but I haven’t seen her in the flesh since the day I left. She always invites me home for the holidays, but I use my work commitments as an excuse. Don’t get me wrong I wanted to see her. I fucking miss her like you wouldn’t believe. Her husband though, not so much. If I never had the displeasure of seeing him again, it would’ve been too soon. I would’ve invited her up here to my place. I thought about it a lot, but I didn’t want that Fuckwit tainting my space. My serenity. Thankfully, that’s something I no longer have to worry about. I can’t wait to see her again.
I’ve never asked my mum, or Ross, how Indi’s doing. As much as I wanted to, I just couldn’t. I guess I was scared. What you don’t know won’t hurt you, right? I have no idea what she’s been up to all these years. She could be married with kids for all I know. That thought makes me feel sick to the stomach. I suppose it’s because after all this time she still holds my heart.
Sure there’s been other women since I’ve been gone. I’m not a fucking saint. I never claimed to be. No one serious though. How can you commit to someone when your heart belongs to another? There’s not a day gone by that I haven’t thought of her, missed her.
I hope she’s happy, I really do. If I am honest with myself, I hope she is single and happy, but that’s my selfish side talking. Although the thought of actually seeing her again excites me more than I care to admit, it also scares the crap out of me. I know nothing of her last five years. Not a damn thing. I have no idea what to expect. Ross and I never talked about anything to do with my old life. It was the way I wanted it.
The alternative was just too hard. I couldn’t move on if I was still stuck in the past. He understood that, but the day he helped me move into my apartment, he said, “I hope you know what you’re giving up. I hope you don’t live to regret your decision.” I knew he was referring to Indiana. I think I’ll always regret walking away from her, but I did what I thought was best. For her.
••••
By the time I pull into my old street, I’m feeling nauseous at the thought of being back here again. I’m not even sure if she still lives with her dad. It’s been five long years, but in a way it only seems like yesterday that I held her in my arms. Kissed those delicious fucking lips of hers. I’m sure some lucky bastard has snapped her up. Who wouldn’t? Anyone would be fortunate to have her. She’s the perfect girl. The one I let get away.
Stupid fucker.
My heart skips a beat as I drive up to the house. Wouldn’t you know it, the first thing I see is her. Just my fucking luck. It looks like she’s washing her car. She’s bent over the hood wearing these tiny little denim shorts. That fucking arse. Jesus I can’t tell you how many times I’ve thought about that arse.
I find it ironic, because the first day I arrived here, her arse was the first thing I saw. Now here I am five years later, and the same fucking thing happens. Déjà vu at its fucking worst. Is the universe trying to fuck with me, or what?
My hands are slightly trembling as I pull into the driveway. My gut is churning. My eyes are trained on her. Please be happy to see me, is my first thought. She straightens up. Her back still to me. When her body stiffens, I know she knows it’s me. The sound of my car probably gave it away.
I still have my Monaro. I’ll never get rid of her. I finally got to finish it. It looks so bad-arse. I fucking love this car. It still has the original Flamenco Red paintwork. I just had it redone. I also kept the black GT stripes on the hood. I replaced the tired old motor with a Blown 350 Chev and a manualised automatic transmission. The interior has been refreshed using a soft black leather. The seats have been recovered in black leather as well, with a red leather stripe through the centre. It has chrome-spoked mags on the fat eighteen-inch tyres. It looks fucking sick. Nothing gets the adrenaline pumping more than being in control of 750HP of pure muscle. I’ve had so many offers to buy this beauty, but I’d never part with her. I’ve spent a small fortune getting her to where she is now, but it was worth every cent. She’s my baby.
Everything seems to slow down as I stay seated in my car staring in her direction. It’s like the world’s suddenly moving in slow motion. She turns. When her eyes meet mine she takes my breath away, literally. Fuck she’s even more beautiful than I remember. Her eyes widen in shock and the sponge in her hand drops to the ground.
I can’t seem to move as I drink her in. My heart is thumping furiously against my ribcage. Fuck I’ve missed those eyes, those lips—her. She hasn’t changed much, just grown. A sixteen year old Indi was beautiful. A twenty-two year old Indi—fucking stunning. My kid is no longer a kid. She’s a sexy-as-hell woman. Drop dead fucking gorgeous.
Only when I manage to pull myself together do I get out of the car. Her eyes are still trained on me. I feel my lips turn up at the corners. Words can’t express how good it feels to see her again in the flesh. I take a step towards her. Her eyes narrow and my smile grows. I’ve missed her spunk, and the attitude that not only pissed me off all those years ago, but turned me the hell on.
“Hey,” I say as I walk towards her. She doesn’t reply. Instead her hands move to her hips and her scowl deepens. I guess after all this time she’s still pissed off with me. I can’t really blame her. “Well look at you,” I add as I bend down and retrieve the sponge she dropped by her feet. As I stand, I can’t hold back the whistle that escapes my mouth as my eyes travel up those sexy, lean legs of hers. It makes my cock twitch. The effect she has on me hasn’t dwindled one bit. What I wouldn’t give to run my fingers, better yet, my tongue, up the length of her legs, burying my face in her sweetness. “The kid’s all grown up,” I smirk when my eyes meet hers again.
Fuck me she’s fine.
“I’m not a fucking kid anymore,” she snaps.
Leaning forward so my face is only inches from hers, I whisper, “I can see that.” Her pupils dilate and I hear her breath hitch. I immediately know my effect on her hasn’t diminished either. It takes everything in me not to pull her into my arms and squeeze the fucking life out of her. Why did I leave it so long to see her? Just being near her again makes me feel alive. “It’s good to see you again, Indi.”
“Well, the feeling’s not mutual,” she says frowning. She’s lying, I can tell. Her body language is saying the complete opposite to her words. She’s still a stubborn arse I see. My eyes leave hers and gaze down at her lips. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve dreamt of those lips over the past five years. Too many to count. I want to kiss her so bad my fucking chest aches. I let my eyes drop a little lower. That’s when I see the necklace I bought her for her seventeenth birthday. I can’t believe she’s still wearing it. It has me smiling like a damn fool. You have no idea what seeing that means to me.
I watch her chest rise and fall as her breathing quickens. She can deny it all she wants, but she’s effected by me. “My eyes are up here, buddy,” she spits. I want to laugh at her comment. I love her smart mouth. I’m glad this part of our relationship hasn’t changed.
Underneath the material of her white top, I can see a hint of her white lace bra covering the swell of her breasts. It gives me an idea. I can’t help myself. I lift the sponge in my hand until it’s hovering over her tits. I hear her gasp when she realises what I’m about to do. I clench my fist tight and the water drips out. It soaks into the fabric of her top, making it transparent. Her nipples harden and so does my cock. Christ. I haven’t even touched her yet and I swear I could break diamonds with this fucker.