I pulled her toward me, and she yelped at my suddenness of my movements. The freezing air was awash with evidence of our harsh intake of breath as we both fought our own internal battles. Her body smashed into mine as she lost balance and her arms went around my waist on instinct and locked tight. Fuck. I could feel her heart beating rapidly against my chest, and it unleashed the beast inside me. I was doing that to her and whether it was in fear or excitement I didn’t really care. My hands cupped her face, my thumb traced the length of her bottom lip as her eyes beamed at me, not willing or able to look away.
“When’s the last time you kissed a man?” I whispered, knowing that I was officially crossing every single boundary I had been desperate to put up.
“Two years ago.” Her breath caressed my thumb as she spoke.
I pushed against her body so she stepped backwards until the wall beside the glass door stopped her. The feeling of her curves, her breasts, and her heartbeat against me as we moved was something I couldn’t explain, but I knew my heart, my head, and my dick were thoroughly enjoying it. “I’m excited to taste you Eden Rivers.”
In the moonlight that was shadowing the balcony, her eyes dropped to my lips and that was all the encouragement I needed. My mouth fell to hers and my heart stammered in my chest. If only she truly knew what this meant. I felt the sharp intake of air she took under the sensation of us colliding as one and my breath became hers and her fears became mine.
The moment Eden let herself completely go, she fell into the kiss and her body went limp. My needy hands wrapped tightly around her waist, taking her full weight. The urge to touch her skin overwhelmed me, and I couldn’t resist. My fingertips glided under her shirt and rested on her lower back just above the waistband of her jeans.
My eager tongue traced her plump bottom lip, sweeping back and forth, tasting her strawberry-flavored lip gloss. She softly moaned against my mouth as a growl erupted from mine. Could she really be enjoying this as much as me? The thought only deepened my need. My tongue danced into her mouth, colliding with hers so eagerly. With complete blatant want, she matched everything I offered. She tasted of berries and gin, better than I could ever have imagined, and the warmth swirling within her body flooded through mine.
Her zealous hands bunched the side of my shirt, pulling me closer as she unraveled in the intensity of the moment. This wasn’t the girl who had fled my office when I first attempted to kiss her, and this certainly wasn’t the girl who exuded nervousness just by being in my presence. Eden Rivers was morphing into a vixen before my eyes. Now, as she kissed me, Eden showed me that she knew what she wanted and wasn't holding back. It felt like this was so natural, so unique, and so wanted and it confused the fuck out of me.
“Um, you two, Chris has left.”
Eden gasped against my lips at the sound of Josh’s amused voice. I had been so lost in Eden Rivers that I hadn't even heard the door open. Her body jerked away slightly but her grasp didn’t lessen on my shirt.
“Shit,” I groaned into the air, and I barely heard the door close as Josh left us in a torrent of heavy, ragged breathing. My eyes found hers still swimming with desperate intensity at what we had just unleashed on each other. I smirked as I leaned in, my heated breath hitting the sensitive skin just below her ear. “You certainly don’t kiss like a woman who hasn’t kissed a man in two years.”
Eden’s body drew back to mine like a magnetic force beckoned between us. Her body tensed under my words and her breathing halted. The vixen had left and insecure Eden had returned, yet she was still completely destroying me.
“We seem to be good at pretending,” she whispered into the night air.
“I wasn’t pretending Eden.” My hands cupped her face, and I was desperate to show her the truth in my words. “I could never pretend with you.”
“But you said…”
“Did anything about that kiss indicate I was pretending?”
Her eyes tore away from mine and dropped to the floor. There was no way I was pretending, and I knew for a fact that she wasn’t pretending. The way her body molded against mine, the way the heat from her body hit mine. How could I possibly never want that again? I was an idiot for thinking once would be enough.
The words that swirled in my head, begging to come out, had the potential to destroy everything. It would be the beginning of a test that I hoped we both failed, a test where I wanted her to prove me wrong. I didn’t think I could have handled her answer, but the question had been sitting on the tip of my tongue from the moment Tori made the stark admission and now after the mind-blowing kiss we shared I couldn’t stop myself any longer.
I tucked a piece of hair behind her ear and my lips fell back to hers for an intimate kiss, a single brush of my lips against hers.
“You can’t say no.” I dropped the bombshell, and her eyes widened in such a way that she answered my question without a spoken word. “That’s a really fucking dangerous habit to have Eden. I didn’t believe it when Tori told me but now I am seeing it every time I am around you. Did you just agree to kiss me because you didn’t think you had another option?”
“It’s not like I can help it. I didn’t ask to be like this Ky,” she spat in anger, her eyes darting away from me and her grip on my shirt loosening. “And I don’t want to talk about this.”
“Did you want to kiss me?” I pushed on, breaking the distance she had put between us.
“You said we were pretending, that you wanted Chris to get away from me.”
“Did you want to kiss me?” I repeated again.
Her eyes darted away from mine and her face went like stone. I could literally see her walls shooting up. “Yes,” she finally said.
“And suddenly I don’t believe you.”
“What do you want me to say? I’m not like other girls Ky. I don’t go around making out with random guys, I don’t let a guy hold me like you just did. I don’t let myself get into positions like this, and it’s scaring the fuck out of me that I actually did want to kiss you. So yes, I wanted to kiss you, and now that it’s done you are making me regret it.”
Her honesty was refreshing. I was finally seeing Eden Rivers and not just her false persona.
“I just have one question for you Eden.”
What the fuck was I doing! Stop Ky, shut your mouth. Eden looked at me expectantly, her eyes still flashing with signs of anger. I was losing control at a fast fucking rate and spiraling into a world I wouldn’t able to claw myself out of. Was this my penance being delivered on a platter? A platter that I would have to give back after a month? I wanted to test her, to put to rest Tori’s fucked-up statement for good.
I wanted her to say no.
I needed her to say no.
“Give me December, be mine for one month. Believe me when I say you won’t regret a second of it. Your yes and your no will be mine and for the right reasons for once.”
Her eyes slammed shut under my question. “I will make you realize that saying no is your given right and that saying yes can still be a beautiful thing.”
I was expecting her to shout after me. I was expecting her to say no and tell me I was an asshole. But she just remained silent. Finally her eyes opened and she looked at me with the most amazingly clear eyes I’d ever seen. I felt my breath hitch as I took her in.
My hand cupped her cheek and my thumb swept over her soft skin as our gaze danced together. “Think about what I’ve asked Eden.”
I dropped my hand and quickly moved towards the door. I didn’t want her answer then, to be honest I wasn’t sure I’d be able to handle her saying either yes or no.
The smell of greasy, comfort food welcomed me the moment I stepped foot into the diner that I had visited with Ky, the very same place where his aunt worked and where I just realized my cousin’s best friend worked. What were the odds? Tommy looked up at me in recognition the moment I stepped through the door and soon enough his arms had engulfed me in a tight hug. I hadn’t seen him since he was fourteen and beginning to notice girls, but now he was tall, handsome, and pimple free. He and my cousin Andy had been so protective of me when they were growing up, even though I was six years older. I never had siblings so they were like my little brothers. They regularly visited me when I was in hospital after the rape, even though I didn’t want anyone seeing me like that. Their stubborn asses didn’t listen to me. They brought my favorite chocolate milk and trashy magazines, kept me company when I couldn’t sleep, and didn’t leave the room when the police updated me on what was happening with the case. While my parents were crumbling at the news that their baby girl had been tainted for life, my honorary little brothers were stepping up and for that reason I would be forever grateful to those two.