A smirk was all he got.
I WAS DROPPING BOMBSHELLS like strippers were dropping panties. What’s that saying? Grab life by the horns, balls, or whatever. Well, that was exactly what I chose to do.
Three days ago, Ky dropped his own bombshell about his plans to propose to Eden. Do you know how hard it was to talk with her and not scream “he is going to propose?” It was like giving me chocolate and telling me to just look at it.
Now I had my own bombshell to drop on my friends. I was nervous, but the excitement of the unexpected was something I couldn’t resist. I was sick of fighting something that would be so good for me. It was time to start the final chapter in the reinvention of Ashlyn Hart, and it would be the biggest chapter to date.
My nerves ran rampant as I entered the restaurant, but I still had a spring in my step and a smile on my face. Earlier in the day, I sent Josh, Ky, and Eden a text and asked them to meet me at Joe’s Place, the Italian restaurant at the bottom of my apartment building, for dinner.
When I came into view, their eyes followed me as I crossed the busy restaurant. Josh gave me the once over, and shot me a questioning look. Considering he was the only one to know of the fuck up known as Lachlan Johnson, I knew my sudden change in attitude made him suspicious, so I offered him my first smile of the group.
“You look mighty pleased with yourself,” Eden stated with a hearty laugh.
My eyes instinctively dropped to her left hand, only to find it ringless. Damn it.
Josh pulled out the empty seat beside him, and I slipped in. Placing my clutch on the table, I sent a smile around the table and couldn’t hold in my excitement any longer. “So, I have news, and I wanted to share it with all of you first. Then hopefully I’ll celebrate with you.” I took a deep breath. “I’ve quit my job.”
A collective gasp resonated around the table. It wasn’t a secret what my job meant to me, and each of them knew the hours and dedication I put into it, so hearing that I was turning my back on it was shocking. My dream was to always work in fashion. I worked my ass off in high school for a scholarship to the best college in the United States to offer a course that would allow me to live my dream. It led me to New York, and had allowed me to engulf myself in the industry. Three sets of shocked eyes stared back at me, but there was one hint of a smile encouraging me and pushing me forward, and that was from Josh.
I focused on that as I began to explain. “You all know fashion is my life, but sometimes you just have to do what’s best for you. I’ve made some incredible connections in this industry, and I’ll be using them for my next venture. I’m starting my own fashion blog, and going out on my own. I already have some interested parties to work with me on a couple of things, which will cover startup costs. And word has gotten out, so I’ve been fielding emails all day regarding opportunities.”
Saying it out loud made it seem concrete. There was no turning back now. I waited with baited breath for their reactions. What they thought meant the world to me, and I fed on their support in so many aspects of my life.
“Wow, Ash! That is huge,” Ky replied, stating the obvious. “Really fucking huge. How did Alessandra take it?”
Alessandra De Solly was the high-profile, world-renowned fashion photographer that had hired me as her Head Stylist. It was a dream job. It saw me travelling the world, having a wardrobe that many people were envious of, and being able to wake every day to do something that I loved. My reputation and work ethic had enabled me to develop a great network in a highly-competitive industry, and it showed I was damn good at my job.
“She is super happy for me, and has asked that I do some commission work with her on the bigger shoots.”
“Have you got a name for your blog yet?” Eden asked, joining the conversation.
I turned my focus to her and smiled. “Not yet. I’m still waiting for the perfect name to hit me.”
“Stoked for you, Ashy,” Josh said softly, his eyes still firmly locked on mine.
“Thanks, Joshy. I’m feeling good.” I knew there was double meaning to my words, and I felt something flush through me knowing that only he and I understood it. “I have some other news, too.”
I lifted the glass of wine that Ky had placed in front of me and took a long sip. The blog news was nothing compared to what I was about to drop. I took a deep breath and allowed my eyes to glance over each of them, wanting to memorize them in a calm and accepting state.
“I’m also thinking of moving to London after the summer.”
There, I said it. It was now out in the universe, and suddenly it felt real.
You could have heard a pin drop. I sucked in a desperate breath, as I felt the air around me was being sucked out. Eden’s eyes shot wide, Ky’s jaw ticked, and Josh’s hands clutched onto his glass so tightly that I was waiting for it to shatter and send shards flying across the table.
“What the fuck?” Ky piped up, and it shouldn’t have surprised me that he’d be the first to comment. “Would you care to explain why you feel the urge to move across the fucking ocean to another fucking country?”
One thing about the Crawfords was they certainly didn’t mind using obscenities to get their point across.
“London has a huge fashion market,” I stated matter-of-factly. I matched his glare as my defenses shot up and my need to protect myself kicked in.
Ky leaned over the table toward me and lowered his voice. “So does New York, Ashlyn.”
I shook my head slightly. “There’s nothing holding me here, Ky.”
“That’s bullshit,” Josh scoffed, shocking everyone with his loud outburst. My head swung around to him and he scowled at me in frustration. “Bull-fucking-shit, Ashlyn.”
“You have no say in this, Joshua Crawford.”
“So now she uses my full fucking name,” he mumbled under his breath and tore his glare away from me in complete dismissal.
“What does Lachlan think of this? London is further from Australia than the states?” Ky asked with a lingering annoyance.
“Can you just support me on this? Is it really too much to ask for my best friends’ support? Yes it’s a big decision, but it’s my decision. I’m still here for another couple of months, can we just focus on that?”
I could feel Josh’s eyes burning into me at the mere mention of Lachlan. I lifted my glass to my lip and finished my wine as an uncomfortable silence fell between the four of us. After the waiter came to the table and took our orders, Ky and Josh spoke quietly about work while I fumbled with the napkin.
“I love the idea of your blog, babe.” Eden’s voice was sweet, and I looked at her and smiled. “Though I’m not excited about you leaving, I’ve always wanted to go visit London, and now I’ll have a reason.”
I decided to ignore the two men who were brooding over my decision, and concentrate on the one person who seemed to be supportive. “I was actually hoping to set up a meeting with you to discuss a few things for the blog.”
Her smile went wide. “Sure. I’ve got a shoot tomorrow, so I’ll pop over afterward.”
Once our meals arrived, I fell into quiet conversation with Eden. It seemed my news of London would not be discussed, but Josh and Ky seemed happy to talk about my blog. My excitement about London could not be diminished, though, and I spoke openly with Eden.
“So are you going to sell your apartment?” Eden asked as she twisted spaghetti around her fork.
“Yeah, I think so. Starting next week, I’m having some work done on it so I’ve reserved a room at The Grand Hotel, because I can’t stay at my place while they work on the bathrooms.”
“Do I not exist?” Josh asked, throwing his hands in the air in frustration.
“What the hell are you talking about?” I asked, still pissed at his reaction about London. “Good to see you’re talking to me now.”