I stood absentmindedly in my kitchen and busied myself making my famous scrambled eggs. It was weird being back in my apartment, but I couldn’t stay away forever. Even though I had music playing, it was still too quiet. Distraction by food was the safest bet. As I stirred the eggy mixture and added shredded cheese, images of Josh on his knees hit me. Fuck, that man had a magical tongue, and boy did my body love it. Last night had been incredible. I still couldn’t get past the fact that he had taken me to Rosie’s. For someone who swears he doesn’t have a romantic bone in his body, he certainly showed true romance last night. All inhibitions were lost, all my fears forgotten, and I got lost in Josh. Tension that had been simmering between us exploded in the best possible way, and I had the aches to prove it.
“You left.”
The wooden spoon flew out of my hand and egg mixture splashed onto the bench as Josh’s voice hit me. I twisted around quickly, to find him leaning against the entrance to my kitchen, arms crossed over his chest, and a scowl taking over his face.
“I got hungry.”
“You are the world’s worst liar,” he scoffed, and stepped into the room. With every step he took, the distance between us dissolved and my lungs seized. “I woke up ready to have a lazy morning with you, and my bed was empty.”
I wanted that too.
“Do you want some eggs?” I stuttered, completely changing the subject, and once again transforming into a babbling mess. He had an effect on me like nothing else. “I’m making scrambled eggs, the ones you like.”
His eyes softened and he nodded quickly. “If having eggs will make you talk, then yes, I’ll have some eggs.”
How did I know he’d say that? I turned my back to him and started frantically beating the egg mixture. The heat of his body beside me held my attention and hitched my breathing. I loved the smell of freshly-showered Josh, and it was beaming off him and circling my senses. He hauled himself up onto the bench, and sat so his thighs were right beside the bowl.
“Last night changed things, Ashy.”
I froze mid stir, and my gaze rose to meet his. His face was placid, but his eyes determined, and I knew it was a dangerous combination.
“I can still feel you,” I admitted softly, deciding to throw caution to the wind and give him what he wanted. “My body aches. I’m fantastically exhausted, and standing here with you so close confuses the fuck out of me.”
“You can still feel me? Christ.”
A chuckle rose from my chest. What did he expect? He ruined me. The egg mixture became my focus once again, and I began to furiously beat. I had never been this focused on making breakfast before. Shit, at this rate I’d be whipping them into meringues instead of scrambled eggs. But with Josh staring at me, and with images of his fucking me flooding my thoughts, I had no control.
Josh jumped off the bench as silence churned around us. Was he leaving? Was that it? My head dropped in defeat, and I cursed under my breath. Since when had I lost the ability to talk around him? I get into his bed, he fucks me into oblivion, and suddenly I lose the ability to speak? For the second time in a matter of minutes, I jumped. Pressing his firm body against my back and threading his arms around my waist, Josh once against consumed me with his head and familiar scent. Wooziness hit me. Could you get a sex hangover? Was that even possible? All the signs were pointing to that: woozy, dry mouth, thumping head, desperate to scoff my face with naughty food? Shit, I was, hands down, suffering from a sex hangover brought on by Josh effing Crawford. I was done for.
Every inch of my body ignited, and being so close to him set off every pleasure point I had. Now that I had him again, my awareness of what he could do seemed to make me constantly ready and willing. Staying away just became so much harder. My head fell back and rested against his shoulder, and the tension taking over my body vanished. Josh placed his hand over mine, tangling our fingers together, and with slow, delicate movements, took over mixing the eggs. The movement of his hands became mechanical, structured, and mindless, while his attention fell squarely onto my neck as his mouth tasted and feasted on my sensitive skin. I sighed and felt heat soaring in my panties, as his tongue swept from my collarbone to my ear.
“I’ll never stop chasing you, Ashy. I will never stop wanting you. I will never stop craving you, and you will never stop tempting me. You need to stop with the thoughts that I know are in your head, because I am not him. His fuck up will be my greatest reward.”
My heart hammered in my chest. How could he read me so well? Lachlan was a constant reminder of why relationships and I would never work. It was like he was sitting on my shoulder, ready to dispel any thoughts I had of Josh.
“I can’t think like that,” I said, practically whimpering under the intensity of his words. “I have no regrets about last night, but I’m too scared of it happening again.”
“I’ll never make the same mistakes again.” His voice vibrated off my skin. “Five fucking years.”
I spun around in his arms and suddenly all inhibitions were lost, never to be found again. What did he mean? We were chest to chest, two hearts frantically beating and joining as one while I pressed hard into him. We stared at each other in silent communication, speaking the words that should be said but were held in a vortex of silence. There was so much I wanted to say to him. I wanted him to know everything that I was thinking. I was scared, I was panicked, but I was intrigued. I wanted him to know that he could take what he wanted, whenever he wanted, and I would never stop him as long as he never took my heart.
“I’ll never stop chasing, Ash, because now that I’ve had you again, I’ll be picking up the pace. What I want, I always get.”
Lightly, his lips touched the side of my mouth, missing my lips entirely, but leaving a lasting impression. The thought of him chasing me caused a shiver to run down my spine. Josh was ruthless. He was overly confident, and stubborn to boot, so I knew I was in for the ride of my life. I hadn’t realized I was gripping his shirt until he attempted to step away. I quickly let go and put some distance between us, then crossed my arms over my chest in fear that I’d reach out for him. His eyes traced my body, and a smirk flittered over his lips.
“My shirt looks good on you,” he said, and nodded in approval. “Really fucking good.”
I couldn’t stop myself from smiling. “I’m keeping it.”
A smirk took over his handsome features, and with another roaming look over my body, he moved to me. “Last night was incredible, Ashy. No regrets, okay? It would destroy me if you had any regrets.”
“How can I regret something that made me feel so alive?”
Softness greeted his eyes and, without saying another word, he brushed his lips gently against mine, then left my apartment.
Three days later, I walked into the reception of Bangs and Beats with determination in my step, ready for a meeting with Ky. After a morning spent prepping myself for this visit and far too many cups of coffee, I felt like I could handle seeing Josh. For the past three days, I had been locked away from the world, working my ass off on the blog and putting in eighteen hour days. During those three days, I was also hiding from the reality of wanting him again. The ridiculous rules I made up seemed to be taunting me, because all I wanted to do was sneak into his apartment, pull down his sweatpants, and ride his cock like a cowgirl.
I was a hot mess of re-engaged hormones, sexually-stimulating orgasms, and a man who seemed determined to unravel me at a wickedly-insane rate.
It had been three days since he rocked my world, and there was still the slightest reminder of where he had been. It would seem that sometime during my begging for him to fuck me harder and faster, he had imprinted himself. Now if I moved a certain way, my body would scream “Josh was here.” I was ruined. Completely and utterly ruined. Trying to concentrate when all my mind wanted to do was replay the single, most erotic moment of my life—the image of Josh marking me when he unloaded his come onto my breasts, then claiming me with a grunt and the words “You’re mine, Ash”—was beautifully hellish.