“I don’t.” He kissed three times down the length of it. “This scar is everything. It’s everything to me. It brought my daughter back to me. It brought Braden into my life. It brought you. It encompasses everything I love about you. Your strength, your determination, your stubbornness. Please, don’t let one of my mistakes make you feel any less, because I just wouldn’t be able to stand it. And if, after all that you still feel less than beautiful, well then… I’ll just have to keep finding ways to convince you otherwise.”
It was coming—I could feel it in my bones. The moment that would forever change us. The one that would eternally alter the way I looked at the world around me. If God forbid we ever parted ways, I would forever chase this moment. I wanted to brand everything about it deep into my skin. The clinking glasses. The hoots of excitement over a game of pool. Our friends laughing and smiling. But most of all, the look in Lane’s eyes when he finally realized that his daughter wasn't the only girl that owned his heart.
My hands slid under his arms and around to his strong backside, so he could hold me even closer. “Everything you love about me?”
“Is that the only part you heard?” He smiled.
I shook off his words. “I heard it all. But…”
His head dipped down and he rested his face next to mine. I felt his warm breaths near my ear and before he spoke, an exciting electric energy blasted through me. “Not in a bar,” he murmured.
“In a bar,” I argued. “Don’t break the moment.”
We stayed huddled together, not wanting to move even an inch away from one another. “It’s not supposed to happen in a place like this. It should be somewhere romantic. Like our bed, so I can slide in you while I whisper softly in your ear.”
“That sounds… amazing.” I wished my words weren’t so breathy. To distract him from his hesitation and myself from my lusty desires, I grabbed the back of his head and forced our lips to meet in a hungry duel. He growled past my lips and pulled me onto his lap up on the barstool. I immediately felt his desire for me under my thighs.
“Really?” I glanced down at his lap.
“As long as you’re in the same room, that’s just how it’s gonna be.”
I continued seizing his mouth with my own again. His plump lips surrounded mine, and I never wanted to be kissed any other way ever again.
He pulled back and panted as he tried to catch his breath. “Damn you, woman. You never let me set the pace and do things when I want to. You attack everything, right in the moment.”
Once again, these didn't sound like bad things to me so I smirked up at him. “You love that about me.”
“Fine!” he huffed. He tried to appear annoyed, but I could see the smile in his eyes that he loved this. “I love you. I can’t believe you’re making me tell you this for the first time in a damn bar, but I love you!”
“God, you’re even hotter when you’re flustered.” I smiled from ear to ear as my heart floated high above us.
“Raegan…” he growled.
“I love you… so much,” I whispered. “I know you didn’t expect to get me when you came for Kate, but you did. You are the reason I have been able to adjust back to real life so easily. During what should have been the most confusing time in my life, I found I could trust in you and I’ll love you forever for giving that to me. Thank you for being a marvelous dad to Kate and loving her the way you do. And thank you for taking exceptional care of Braden.”
“I love Braden, too.”
“You don’t have to say that,” I whispered. I knew that a relationship between a man and another man’s child would take time.
“I’m not just saying that. I love that little guy. The second he stood up to me at the police station to protect Kate, I loved him. ”
My eyes welled with tears because I’d never imagined I would find someone who could even come close to loving Braden as much as I did. I had always wanted a strong male figure in his life, but after he was born I had just accepted that I would have to play both roles for him. Lane smiled at me and swiped his thumb under my eyes.
“I love you,” he said with an overabundance of emotion in his voice that would forever be seared into my bones.
“I love you.” I kissed his nose. “I love you.” I moved closer to his chest and kissed his cheeks. “I love you.” I wiggled seductively on him. “God, I need to have sex with you… now.”
“Uh, earth to the love birds, sex in public is unfortunately still illegal!” Cole’s words forced themselves in between our lips, and we finally realized that we were still sitting in a bar… with our friends… and about fifty other strangers.
“It’s true guys!” Em called out, laughing. “Trust me, I’ve tried!”
“This is why you don't start that shit in a bar,” he growled in my ear. Lane stood and pulled my hand, so I was forced to keep up with him. “We’re out.” As we passed everyone, he leaned over and kissed Audrey on the cheek. “We’ll see you in the morning, doll, when we pick up the kids.”
A round of groans passed from my new group of friends, and I smiled that they were actually disappointed we were retiring. I waved to the girls. “Don’t leave!” a few called out.
“My girl needs sex. I deliver,” Lane said unabashedly. He looked at the guys, quirking his eyebrow in question. “What would you do?”
All three of them, Jax, Jace, and Cole, proceeded to point toward the exit. I laughed the entire drive home. But with a house free of children for the first time, there was a lot more than laughing going on the rest of the night.
- EIGHTEEN -
RAEGAN -
I realized Lane’s mood was deteriorating as the week moved on. He hovered over me every chance he got and grew more edgy by the day. I didn't understand what was going on at first. I wasn't going to complain that he was following me around or that he would trap me up against a wall any chance we were out of the kids’ eyesight, but I began to recognize that he was feeling insecure.
When out of the blue Lane decided to take Friday off, I didn't think he had done it so he could go shopping for school clothes with us. My mind had been so caught up in getting Kate and Braden ready to start school, I had forgotten that Adam, Braden’s father, was still picking me up tonight.
So when Friday morning rolled around and Lane stuck to me like glue, I finally registered his feelings of unease. He didn't want me to go tonight, plain and simple. What he probably didn’t fully comprehend was that I didn't want to go either. But I also didn't want Braden’s father causing any trouble so I was willing to sit down and talk to him like an adult about my son. I didn’t know why now, after all this time, he wanted to be in Braden’s life, but I would at least hear him out.
I moved down the hallway looking for my handsome man and finally found him in the spare room, which was kind of Lane’s catch-all room. He had gym equipment that he used when he couldn't sneak off to his boxing gym. On the opposite side, he had a large desk that he sat at and finished up any work he didn't get done at the office. He was staring at a stack of papers, and there were creases in the corners of his eyes.
I stood in the doorway taking him in until he looked up at me. “Hate to break it to you, but one day we’ll have to convince them they need to have separate bedrooms.” I gestured around the room. “And then we’re going to have to figure out a new place for this stuff.”
He smiled because he loved when I spoke about the future, especially when I mentioned the four of us together. I made my way around the desk and sat in his lap, snaking my hands around his neck.