Braden’s hand materialized from its entrapment in Lane’s arms and patted his scruffy face.
“Daddy?” Braden croaked with a sleepy voice. I gasped at the word and Lane’s eyes shot wide. He squeezed him tighter and buried his face into Braden’s shoulder.
I could barely hear Lane’s voice, but I was able to make out that he responded, “I’m here.” He looked as if he were breathing Braden in. “I’m here, I’m here,” he repeated.
Braden had never—not ever—called anyone daddy. We had never spoken of a father for him, and for him to say that word all on his own, broke me—especially in light of this evening. I had to hold a hand out to brace myself against the wall as my whole body shook from my heaving breaths.
I must have stood there for at least a good ten minutes before Lane finally lowered Braden’s sleeping form back underneath the covers and meticulously tucked him back in. He tried to quietly remove himself from the bed without any of the springs squeaking. When he was free, he strode purposefully back toward me.
“Lane…”
“Don’t.”
My legs were in the air in one swift movement and my arms shot out to grab a hold of his neck to balance myself. Without a word or even much emotion on his face, he carried me to the bedroom, closing and locking the door behind us. I shoved my face into the crook of his neck and eventually my legs made their way around his waist. I was only wearing his t-shirt and my panties, so I shivered when his warm hands cupped my ass in support.
The bed dipped as he climbed on top with me securely wrapped around him. He pulled back the sheets and then laid us down on our sides, facing one another.
“Did you hear what he called me?” His hoarse whisper brushed across my cheeks. I nodded against his chest and held my arms tightly around him. I could hear the awe in his voice, as if he didn't believe what he had actually heard. “Don’t ever do that again. Don’t ever leave me. Don’t ever take him from me. He’s mine just as much as you are mine.” His hand clutched the back of my head like he didn’t want to let me go. It wasn’t necessary though, because I never wanted to be anywhere else. “Please, just don’t ever do that again.”
“I wasn’t leaving. I was just giving you time to process everything.”
“You never give me time to process. It’s one of the things about you that I love so much,” he whispered. “Just don’t do that. I don’t ever want to come back and find you guys gone. I can’t handle that.”
“Oh, Lane,” I sighed.
“His terrarium was gone. That’s how I knew.”
I squeezed in as close as I possibly could, still trying to let my haywire nerves get the memo that he was here and in my arms.
“You told me to leave Kate… I just thought… you didn’t want to see me when you got back.”
He groaned painfully and said, “Babe, I’m sorry. I was speaking nonsense. All I could think about was that asshole causing my daughter to be taken from me. I just wanted to hold her and never let anyone touch her again. I didn’t know if you would go back home, and I knew I needed to go by Audrey’s. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that. But I would never—and I mean never—not want to see you.”
I kissed his lips and let his words filter in, erasing any doubts I had been having about us.
“I’m sorry I scared you tonight. I was furious at him for everything, and his mouth just kept spewing more and more shit and I snapped. I never snap, I swear.” His eyes were pained, and I couldn’t believe he felt any ounce of remorse for what he had done to Adam.
“Adam deserved worse, Lane.”
“Yeah, but you shouldn't have had to witness it. I don’t like that side of me,” he mumbled.
“The side that is fiercely protective of his family? The side that would risk jail time in order to right a wrong? I love all your sides, Lane. All of them. But please, don’t ever risk getting locked up again. I’d rather Adam go to jail all in one piece than you guys becoming cellmates. We need you here.” I ran my hands through his now-drying strands.
“I promise I won’t take that risk ever again. I want to be wherever you guys are.”
“Lane, I need to apologize. I was the reason—”
“Don’t you dare.”
“Lane, if I hadn’t been in your life, you would have seen Kate grow up. You would have seen her laugh, her first words, her first tooth…” I sighed heavily as I let the information finally sink in for myself. “Ash would still be alive.”
“Look babe, we can sit here and ‘shoulda,’ ‘woulda,’ ‘coulda' all night, but that’s not going to change anything. Don’t let that sick bastard let you believe for one second that any of this was because of you.”
“I’m not saying it’s my fault…” I whispered.
“Not in so many words. But you are placing some blame on yourself. This is how life worked out for us. It sucked really bad for awhile. It was awful. I’m sure you and I both have cried ourselves to sleep more nights than most people cry in their whole lives. But now… now it’s incredible. Can you honestly tell me you had one day while you were with Adam that was better than any of the days we’ve shared together so far?” He pushed me back only a few inches so we could look one another in the eyes.
“Today was better than any day I ever had with him.”
“Damn…” he laughed. “I’ll admit, I was a cocky bastard and knew you would tell me that you hadn’t, but man… I wasn’t expecting that.” His grin melted me.
“It’s the truth,” I offered.
“I know our friends try and help, but please promise me in the future you’ll go with your gut. The girl I love so much wouldn't have run off to this place.”
“I didn’t want to.”
“And I knew that. I panicked for a little bit before realizing you would never do that to me.” He moved in closer and gently kissed my lips.
“Thank you for coming after us though. How did you find our room anyway? Jace didn't stick around for check-in.”
“There’s a girl working the front desk.” He shrugged as if seducing a receptionist was an everyday occurrence for him. “Oh, here.” He reached in between us and dug deep into his pocket. He pulled out a slip of paper and handed it to me. “I don’t actually need this.”
I glanced at the little yellow page and snapped my eyes back up to him. “Oh God, what did you do to the poor girl? She even kissed it with bright red lipstick and everything.” My hands wadded up the page with her number and lips.
“I didn't do anything,” he chuckled. “I merely asked for your room number. I thought she was writing it down for me, but then she handed me that. Do you really think I was going to argue with her? I would use all of my charms if it meant finding you.”
“Hmm… that sounds pretty possessive of you. And it sounds like something Jaxon and Jace would do.”
“Well, maybe I should start taking some pointers, because they’re in their own beds with their women tonight. I had to chase mine down.” He began to run his lips up the side of my neck and I tilted my head to give him more room to work. “Don’t be mistaken, Rae. Just because I let some douches at a bar have their fun flirting with you, that doesn't mean I won’t come out swinging when I think things have gone too far. You’re mine. You sleeping in a bed that I’m not in, it’s just not happening, baby.”
“I love you,” I breathed out.
“I have a son.” His awed tone made me smile.
“I’m glad someone understands the significance of having him in their life.” For as long as I live, I would never be able to understand why a father would not want his child.
“I do, baby. Trust me, I will treasure him every day. I would never let anything happen to him. I promise that I will always love and protect you guys. No more holding back because I’m afraid of someone forcing me to break my word. I promise the three of you that you have me forever.”