“All I see when I look at you, Blue, is the future, our future. I can finally see past tomorrow. Fuck, you let me see past the next goddamn thirty seconds. You told me on the beach that day that I woke you up, but truth, baby—you woke me up. Fifteen fucking years I slept through life. Now I’m fucking living it, wide awake.”
“Oh god, Chase, I lo-love y-you so much,” I cried.
Then I bent over and pressed my lips to his. He gripped my hips, struggling for control and started to move us again, ever so slowly, in and out, deeper and harder. I was making him crazy. Hell, I was making myself crazy.
“Fuck. You feel so good. You close, baby?”
“Oh yes, so close.”
“Let it go, I want to come together.” He released my hips and gave me control. Every nerve tingled, every muscle contracted. Spasmed. Clenched. Pulsed.
“That’s it baby, give me everything.”
I buried him as deep as I could bear and his warm release filled me. He gave me everything.
I collapsed against his chest. The sound of our rapid heartbeats and breathing played like a song. Our song. When it finally quieted, I broke our connection and lifted up. My fingertips found the pale pink line still left on his forehead. It was the reminder that just a few weeks ago we were broken and struggling, but we didn’t give up.
I leaned over and kissed it. Kissed him. “Promise me something, no more...” I brought his hands to my lips and kissed each knuckle. “No more fists, Chase ... those demons don’t have to be fought anymore. Let’s keep them asleep ... we’ll stay awake ... together.”
He looked like he wanted to say something, but I wasn’t finished. I covered his lips with a finger. His eyes turned glassy. Slowly I worked my way down his body, my lips trailed along his tattoo. First do no harm. I finally understood its true significance. “This,” I traced each character, “is not your reminder ... this is truth. This is you.”
Chase needed to realize he never harmed anyone, not his sister, not his unborn child. He could never harm anyone. The emotion in the room was thick and in that moment there was nothing left to say. So I wrapped my body around him, and we held each other until the morning sun streamed through my windows.
Over the next week we didn’t really talk about that night again. We didn’t need to. We were both beautifully awake and blissfully living.
“I’ll send Pete to pick up your parents.”
“I’m gonna go with him. I want to be there when they get off the plane. I already took a half day. It’s Friday, and luckily, pretty slow on peds.” Their plane was arriving around four.
“You know I would come if I could, but I really need to finish up a couple things here first.” He seemed totally distracted and he had since last night.
“That’s fine. You sure everything is okay?” The only interruption we’d had to our bliss this week was a couple of cryptic phone calls Chase answered and physically left the room for, always business, and not just Asher. Lawyers, bankers, real estate brokers, financial advisors—Chase had a whole freaking team. The conversations I easily tuned out usually began with lots of numbers. I was probably in the loop a little more than I needed to be, but we had no secrets, and Chase was very comfortable talking about his financial security. He wanted me to be comfortable discussing it as well. I was still adjusting; it was going to take time. Being financially comfortable was not something I was used to and I wasn’t sure if I would ever be. Anyway, the last couple of days I felt like he was hiding something from me.
“Everything’s great. Excited for the weekend?” He kissed my lips. “Go, beautiful, you took a half day, go get your nails done or something. Where do you want Pete to pick you up?”
“Your apartment,” I said.
We decided my dad and Sharon would stay at my place for the weekend. Most of my stuff was in Chase’s anyway, because as he liked to remind me on a daily basis, “One of us has to be up before the sun while the other hits snooze a few dozen times. Gotta take advantage of proximity, baby.” Justifiable argument, but his sarcasm deserved the eye roll it got daily as well. Except when he added, “And I’m sure as fuck not going to sleep any earlier, not when your gorgeous body is lying next to me. No chance I’m wasting one precious second.” Yeah, that deserved way better than an eye roll. Mmm.
“Okay, baby, I’ll tell Pete. You gonna take them right to your apartment?”
“That’s what I was thinking, figured they might want to freshen up before dinner.”
“Perfect, see you then.” He kissed me one last time and disappeared down the hall. Obviously in a rush to do something.
28
HEA
Maybe he was trying to tell me my nails sucked. They did. My nervous habit wreaked havoc on my cuticles. I stood in the nail salon, staring at the rainbow of colors in front of me. If Sierra weren’t busy with her legs in the air I would have dragged her with me. But her OB insisted she take it easy for the next couple of weeks since her legs all of a sudden looked like they belonged to a baby elephant. One of the perks of being nine months pregnant at the end of August.
I flipped the nail bottles over one by one to read the name on the bottom. Such a girl habit. Even sillier was trying to guess the abbreviations the nail girls Sharpied on the top. Ha! This one was perfect. I pulled out my phone and typed Sierra a quick text she would appreciate.
Getting nails done.
HEA!
Confused???
Oh. I was disappointed with my BFF. Was she slacking on her romance novels?
Really?! Come on.
Know you have a book in ur hand!
What are we always waiting for??
Asspuck, look in the mirror-
Pretty sure we BOTH found it already :)
Her text hit me in the gut, in a good way. A really fan-freakin-tastic way.
True :)
No one deserves her Happily Ever After…
More than you!
Right back at ya.
Xoxo
I caught a couple of ladies staring in my direction. I’m sure they were wondering what the hell I was smiling at. My smile even felt huge to me. They’d be jealous.
Three hours sounded so much longer than it was in reality. Why was that? A manicure, a Whole Foods shop and a latte (decaf) drop off to the swollen BFF, and now I was running late. And I thought I’d have time to squeeze in a run. Yeah, not so much. I barely had time to shower and change. My hair still wet, I yawned and grabbed my fabulous smaller-than-luggage bag, eager to head for the airport. Eager to see my dad. Suddenly, a quiet night at home, just the four of us, sounded like a much better idea than whatever delicious restaurant Chase picked. No question, that was more my dad and Sharon’s speed anyway, especially after traveling all day. I was tempted to text Chase to see if he’d mind, but I didn’t. He was so thoughtful about this weekend, planning everything and arranging for my dad to celebrate my birthday with us. I would never disappoint him, didn’t matter how exhausted I was.