His head came up like an alarmed horse. “But I can’t!” he exclaimed. “I’m — ”
“A danger three nights a month. Yes, I know,” she retorted. “There are twenty-seven nights a month when you are not. Not to mention all the days. So why don’t you make use of them? You could use some sun! And don’t tell me that you get all the sun you need up there in your workroom. You need to get out. You need to see people. You need intelligent conversation! You need to remind people at Court that you still exist. And you need to do that so that the King can’t one day decide you are an inconvenience and make you vanish. And you know he would, if he thought he had to.”
Before he could answer, she went on. “Now, if you are just using this as an excuse because you really would rather be a hermit, that’s one thing. But otherwise, you are depriving yourself of a great deal of pleasure for no reason at all. And if all I had to depend on for conversation and company was Eric? I think I’d throw myself out of a window. He isn’t stupid, but his interests are so narrow I doubt I could slip a sheet of paper in between them.”
He stared at her in astonishment for a moment, then broke into laughter.
“All right,” he said, finally, wiping his eyes with his napkin. “You win. I’ll consult with the Godmother and the King and see what can be done. Bella, I am horribly sorry that I did this to you, but I can’t tell you how happy I have been since you arrived. You just keep looking at things and seeing answers where I couldn’t. I haven’t heard music in so long — ”
“Oh, now that I can remedy!” she exclaimed. “Some of the Spirit Elementals actually are musicians, as you suggested. You can listen to them anytime you like. Just ask them.”
“I — Well.” He shook his head. “Do you have any idea of the amount of change you’ve made here for me in just the last month?”
She raised her chin. “Of course I do. I’ve stopped the waste in the kitchen, I’ve organized your stillroom, I’ve replenished many of your herbal supplies, I found out that some of the servants are quite intelligent and can talk, and that some of them are musicians — ”
“All of that and more,” he replied, raising his hand to stop the flood of words. “That wasn’t what I meant. I meant, to me.”
She blinked at him. “Well, how can I?” she replied. “I don’t know what things were like before I came here, so I have nothing to compare now to.”
He laughed. “Bring logic into it, will you?”
She rolled her eyes. “Why not? No one else seems to.”
“Oh. Bah. There you go again. All right, let’s go continue your lessons. And as you probably guessed, yes, I have a mirror I can speak to the Godmother with, so we’ll go call her green-faced majordomo and tell him what we have discovered and deduced.” He stood up, and the servants swooped on the table, eager to take everything away. She moved quickly, to avoid being in a collision with a platter or bowl.
“For all we know, he does all her research and can tell us right away what Traditional Paths there are for protective were-beasts,” she said, as she followed him out into the hall.
“True enough.” He paused. “I would like to think I was being your protector instead of your predator…”
She got the oddest feeling when he said that. A sort of quivery feeling in her stomach, and a shiver on the back of her neck. But it wasn’t a bad feeling, as if her instincts were trying to warn her against something. And it wasn’t the feeling of pressure that The Tradition had given her over Eric.
But she shook her head a little, and brushed the feelings aside. There were more important things to deal with right now.
And for all she knew, it was just a draft.
“I told you that when you came here, no quarters I could give you were going to be worthy of you,” he continued. “It wasn’t just being gallant. I already knew you were brave. I didn’t know that you were kind and clever, I didn’t know how considerate you were of others, even those who are literally invisible. Now I know all that, and if I had the King’s suite, it wouldn’t be worthy of you.”
No…no, it wasn’t a draft. Now it wasn’t a shivery feeling, it was a feeling of warmth. She found herself smiling at him. He smiled back. Behind his spectacles, his eyes twinkled.
“I think you’re giving me more credit than I deserve,” she said awkwardly.
“And I think you’re giving yourself too little.” He winked at her. “But let’s not argue. Let’s see what the Godmother has to say.”
16
THE GREEN FACE HAD NO INFORMATION FOR THEM, but as Sebastian had suggested, he was one of the sources for the Godmother’s information. He promised that he himself would contact them when he had gathered as much as he could in the next day or two. Eric did not appear at supper, which did not surprise Sebastian.
“He’ll have stayed in the city. He generally does when he has a reason to go there,” Sebastian explained. “He gets money from our Factor in the city, and uses the Ducal town house — don’t get excited about that, I’ll bet it’s much smaller than your father’s house. I only keep on a Housekeeper there, but he won’t care; he eats at the taverns, anyway, and he visits the — ” Sebastian stopped, flushing a bright crimson. “There are women,” he said, after a long pause. “He might be gone a couple of days, maybe longer. It’s been a while since he went to the city. He’s been working really hard since my little…escape. He could stay a week and I think he deserves it, if he needs it.”
“Ah,” she replied, without comment. “Well, would you like to listen to some music tonight? I’m going to — I asked Sapphire to tell the others.”
“Really? Yes, I would!” He brightened considerably. “Very much so! I haven’t — well, I haven’t had any music that wasn’t my own bad singing in years.”
“Have you taken any thought to what I suggested about going back to Court at least in the middle of the month?” she asked, pointedly.
“I’d rather wait and see what the King and the Godmother say,” he demurred, looking uneasily down into his soup.
“Now, is that because you don’t want to go, or — ”
He interrupted her. “I want to go. I miss people. I miss music and libraries and talking and dancing. I even miss the ridiculous maneuvering at Court — since I was never a part of it, it was all pretty funny to watch. But…at the same time, it terrifies me. Everyone knows, or will know, that I’m a wizard now. I’m afraid people will be as afraid of a wizard as they would be of the beast.”
She pursed her lips. “Well…what did they think of you before?”
He shrugged. “Not much. I suppose I was sort of an amusing non-entity. Nobody bothered to trouble me because I wasn’t important enough to be a threat. I suppose at some point a desperate mother — or someone like your stepmother, anxious for any sort of title for her girl — would have started throwing a daughter at me, but it hadn’t happened yet. People liked me well enough. I know how to tell an amusing story, and even better, I know when a story isn’t amusing and I don’t tell it. I dance passably. I hunt well, and ride well. I don’t get into quarrels or, God forbid, duels. I play cards, but not for high stakes, and I’m not very lucky or very unlucky. I do — or did — have good discussions with the few folks who have scholarly inclinations, and some of the older people at Court. I’m a good listener.” He spread his hands wide. “There you have me. Such as I am. Quite forgettable.”
“Eat your soup and stop feeling sorry for yourself,” she said, a little sharply, because it did look as if he was about to mope. “You might not have made any fast friends, but it doesn’t sound as if you were trying. And unless someone at Court is responsible for your current condition, you didn’t make any enemies, either.”