“If you could go anywhere in the world, where you would go?” I asked, as I linked my fingers with hers and rubbed the tops of her knuckles, an endearing touch I seemed to be doing often when it came to her.
“Money doesn’t matter?” she asked.
I nodded and she continued.
“I feel like this is going to sound so pedestrian to someone like you, who has been everywhere, but I would love to go to a place like Tahiti where the water is crystal clear and you can stay in huts that hover over the water. It looks so serene, so withdrawn that I would love to lose myself there. But that would never happen since I don’t have the money, let alone a passport.”
“You don’t have a passport?” I asked with a little more shock than I should have allowed in my voice.
She shook her head and said, “No, never had a reason to get one.”
“Well, we are going to have to change that,” I said, as I wrapped my arm tighter around her waist and placed a soft kiss on her shoulder.
“Where would you go?” she asked.
Knowing I had the most cheese-dick answer ever, I contemplated answering, her but when she sighed into my shoulder, I knew I could trust the charming, yet foul-mouthed girl that rested in my arms.
“I would visit wherever my mom is.”
“You don’t know where your mom is?” Goldie asked, her voice full of sadness.
“She passed away awhile back from AIDS.”
“Oh Jett, I’m so sorry.”
“It’s a story I would rather not get into, but if I had a chance, I would visit her, just for an hour longer.”
Why did I bring up such a dark subject? Fuck, I was losing my mind. I had a girl resting on my lap as I embraced her and was talking about my mom, of all people. I didn’t do shit like this. I didn’t talk to women, not after Natasha left me. I became numb to the world, but the minute Goldie walked into my life, I found myself throwing all my ideals into the wind, acting like a fucking pussy talking about my feelings and reveling in a woman’s touch. What the hell?
She must have noticed the tension rolling through my body because she turned on my lap so she straddled me and looked down into my eyes.
“We don’t have to talk about it. We don’t have to talk about anything…ever.”
“What do you want from me?” I asked, not even thinking what her reaction might be.
Her body retracted from mine as she instantly left my lap sat down on the bench. “Goldie, I didn’t mean it like that.” It was the first time I had called her by her real name and she noticed.
“I…I don’t want anything from you, Jett. I’m sorry if it seems like I do. I just find it rude to refuse when someone is so kindly offering…”
I cut her off and placed her back on my lap. “That’s not what I meant.”
What did I mean? She searched my eyes as she looked for answers I didn’t have. I had no clue what was going on with me, but all I knew was I had a myriad of emotions running through my body that I had no handle on.
“Maybe we should just go back to the house after this,” she said, while looking at her lap.
“Is that what you want?” I asked, as silently I hoped it wasn’t what she wanted. I wanted more time with her, even if it was spent in silence. There was something eerily comforting about just being in her presence. She was a breath of fresh air, a ray of sunshine in the dark that encompassed my life.
“No, I want to spend more time with you, but I don’t want you to think that I am using you.”
“I don’t think that you are and I’m sorry if made you feel that way.”
She gave me a faint smile, but I took it as her acceptance.
“You called me Goldie.”
“Did you not like that?”
“No, I did. I like it when you call me Goldie and…little one,” she added.
“I like it too,” I said, as I kissed her knuckles again. “How about some more M&M’s?”
“Aren’t we going to ruin our appetites?”
I gave her a smirk and said, “No amount of candied peanuts is going to ruin my appetite.” I squeezed her hips, causing her to roll her eyes.
“Honestly, you are so much better than that.”
“Can’t a guy have a cheese-dick line everyone once in a while?”
“Yes, they can, but you aren’t any ordinary guy. I hold you to a higher standard.”
“And why is that?” I asked, as I pushed a stray hair behind her ear, taking in her gorgeous eyes that were full of life.
“Because, no ordinary guy would pluck a girl like me off the streets, give her a place to live, food to eat, and the opportunity of a lifetime to make something of myself.” She leaned down a gently placed a kiss on my cheek. “Thank you.”
Captured in the abnormality of the situation and the way she looked at me as if I was her savior, I nodded and said, “It’s been my pleasure, little one.”
Chapter Thirty Three
“Falling Slowly”
Goldie/Lo
“Never in my life have I seen a woman devour an entire plate of raw oysters before. I must say, I’m impressed,” Jett said, as he leaned back in his chair and eyed me up and down.
I licked my fingers and said, “That’s because you’ve been hanging out with wafer-thin blondes for far too long.”
Jett chuckled. “I didn’t know the color of hair on a woman depicted their eating habits.”
I leaned over and patted Jett on the cheek, “Oh how little you know, dear sir.”
I pulled out the napkin I’d shoved down the front of my dress as a bib and wiped my mouth before crumpling it and throwing it down on my plate.
Jett just shook his head and said, “Quite the lady you are.”
“Hey, just be happy I’m not picking my damn teeth with my fork right now.”
Jett gestured with his arm, “By all means, pick away. It would go right along with your napkin fashion statement.”
“Why Jett Colby, you are truly showing your inner snob right now and it’s not the least bit flattering.”
A brief flash of pain crossed his face as he took in my statement. I was about to say I was only kidding when he waved his hand for the check and pulled out his phone. “I need to make a call, I’ll be back.”
At that moment, I was jolted out of the infatuation haze that I had been in ever since I saw Jett leaning against his car back at the house. I wondered if I’d said something wrong, if my comment actually hurt him. I was only kidding, but clearly he didn’t get it with the way he fled the table, as if I had dragon breath and he couldn’t stand to be around me anymore.
Questioning my state of breath after raw oysters, I cautiously blew into my hand and took a quick sniff. Not minty fresh, but not a shit mouth either…alright, couldn’t be the breath. I pulled out my compact and took a look at my face and didn’t find any stray boogers or eye goops.
Sooo…it must have been my comment. Now feeling guilty, I waited impatiently for Jett to come back to the table. He was a hard man to read. At one point, he was tenderly kissing my shoulders, my cheek, my hand, but then the next minute he was retreating, physically and emotionally. I was getting mixed signals and, frankly, didn’t know what to do about it.
A part of me wanted to throw caution into the wind and press my lips against his and take what I wanted. It wasn’t lost on me that he hadn’t kissed me on the lips yet. I could see that he wanted to, but he never did…which, being a woman with needs, his limited action were driving me crazy, as if he was doing it on purpose. Fucker.
I saw him walk back as he looked down at his phone with a crinkle in his forehead.
“Everything okay?”
“Yes.” He sat down and grabbed the check the waiter left. He put more than enough cash in the black check folder and got up.
The mood between us dramatically changed and I didn’t know what to do to make it better. I felt stupid for saying something that wasn’t to his liking. I felt almost ignorant for not knowing how to act like a “lady” around him. I knew the bib napkin was a little much, but I didn’t want oyster juice all over my pretty dress.