I nodded, adding, “Very likely. Even if it’s a frightening scenario. And laughable, too. But it explains the rest.”
He gave me an inquisitive look.
“Your role in it,” I explained.
A look of astonishment appeared on his face, and he forced out a laugh.
“My role was that I set this chain of events in motion when I looked for you and called Antoinette.”
“Of course, of course. No argument about that. But I mean something else.”
“What?”
“Carlos.”
His face grew pale. “What about him?” he asked.
“Maybe we are being bugged here. But I am confident that the Deuxième Bureau heard about Carlos from you personally.”
“Meaning that I’m a Deuxième Bureau agent?”
“Not necessarily. I don’t think so. There is a modern, civilized way for these things. You pick up the phone and call a friend of yours, someone you know has some connection to the Deuxième Bureau. Someone like the owner of the café where we saw Lamia. You chat with him. And during the course of the conversation you throw out some information that you know very well the Deuxième Bureau will be interested in. Practically speaking, you didn’t do anything that professional agents do. All you did was have a chat in the form of a response to the traditional question: ‘Any news?’”
“And what would I gain from this chatter?”
“A little security, perhaps,” I replied. “Some support in a moment of crisis. Life is hard here. Beirut is a den of tangled and contradictory loyalties. And then, isn’t it likely that you are obligated to them for what happened with me today?”
“I never imagined that you thought so poorly of me.”
“I wish it was like that: that it was just about thinking poorly of you.”
His fingers were shaking. Without looking at them, I knew that my fingers were shaking too.
“Would you like me to give you another example of thinking poorly?” I asked. “There’s the subject of the notebook. I am confident that I left it on the bedside table. So how did it end up in my bag?’’
“If I took it, then logically, I would put it back in the same place.”
“On the contrary. You know I looked all over for it on the bedside table, around it and under it. If it turned up in the same place, then it would be obvious. The smarter thing to do is to have it turn up somewhere else to convince me I had forgotten where I put it.”
“So I took your notebook and gave it to the Deuxième Bureau?”
“Maybe you only flipped through it. You were afraid I had contacts that could expose you to danger.”
“And what else?”
I laughed. “Isn’t that enough?”
“I want to hear this.”
“As you wish. Maybe we’ll begin from prison, which you left after one week. Or from 1968, when they appointed you to Beirut, while all your friends were either in prison or just coming out.”
“And how do you explain that?”
“Weren’t you one of those responsible for organizing the Socialist Union? You used to write reports about trends in public opinion; that is, the opinions of your colleagues in the newspaper?”
“You’re amusing me quite a bit with your detective-novel revelations. I always considered you my closest friend. And here you are, proving me wrong in my estimation of you.”
“Life is a series of letdowns. The strange thing about it is that I — in my heart — don’t blame you for anything.”
I happened to glance at the television screen, and found that the news had started. I turned up the volume and listened to the anchorman talk about 3 billion dollars that Iraq had received from Saudi Arabia to make up for its losses in the war with Iran. Then a photo of Sadat appeared on the screen in relation to an interview he gave with the German magazine Der Spiegel, in which he stated that Egypt and the US had a strategic relationship, and that “his country” was ready to offer facilities to the United States and Western nations so those states could defend their interests in the Gulf.
Sadat seemed to have monopolized the evening news, since he soon appeared at a convention for his political party in Cairo. This time his distinctive voice came out to us as welclass="underline" “On May 27, 1979… that is, after I raised the Egyptian flag over Arish… On the 27th I was in Arish and Begin came up to me… We went ’n’ visited Bir Saba… Y’know, the topic of Sinai is totally over… uhh, by raising the flag over Arish… I told him, c’mon, let’s sit down… That happened yesterday when I raised the flag over Arish… That means a lot… Why? It means that you really respect your agreements… I know that… You really carry out your obligations… OK, what’s still to come is we have a year left for Palestinian self-rule… Starting from now, we get rid of the agreement… What’s still to come, Begin… Begin said, That’s OK… What do you think? He didn’t need — he didn’t ask me for anything more than security measures… All the security measures they asked for, I told them, I’ll give ’em to you and more. He told me something really great… I told him what would you say to a million square meters a day of Nile water… He told me something really great…”
I suddenly felt overtired and wanted to sleep. As I stood up, I said, “I’m going to bed.”
He didn’t say a word and kept looking at the television screen in an anxious silence. I leaned over him and put my hand on his head.
“Believe me, Wadia,” I said, “I don’t blame you at all.”
Chapter 24
The macho bodyguard had a serious look on his face. He occupied a seat next to the secretary’s desk, stretching his long legs out in front of it. He nearly blocked the way. As usual with him, his gun hung from his waist.
“Madame is waiting for you,” the secretary said, gesturing to the inner office.
I walked down the corridor leading to her office. I saw her standing at the door, with her hands out to me. She took my hand between her palms and drew me inside. Then she pulled back from me and headed to her chair behind the desk, saying, “Have a seat and tell me what happened.”
I sat down in the chair by the front of her desk. I noticed she had combed her hair back and gathered it into a knot. She was wearing a pink silk sleeveless blouse, and a full skirt of the same color. I immediately noticed she wasn’t wearing a bra.
She saw where my eyes were looking and her face went red.
“The sun is strong today,” she said. “Happy, ya bey?”