Her shoulders came up and dropped in a nonchalance attitude. “If you don’t believe me, go back out there. The boys are discussing it as we speak.”
I darted past her and made my way to the back door. When I reached the handle, I twisted it and hesitantly stepped out onto the deck, trying to keep myself inconspicuous so I didn’t tip them off that I’d come back. This was all a big mistake. She was just jealous. Veronica must have had a relationship with Luke at some point, and she wanted him back. It was the only explanation that I could come up with. For one, he’s never even mentioned her to me, not that we’d really been together long enough to delve into our past relationships. And two, I couldn’t fathom him taking me out, dining me, all of the laughs we’ve shared, and we’d even slept together, for it all to be just a ploy. Stuff like this didn’t happen in real life. This was the shit that you read about in novels. As I neared them, I stayed hidden behind people who were talking, I overheard Luke and the other three with a few of the pledges.
“I’d say it’s a done deal. The chick RJ brought could give two shits that she’s with him. In fact I just saw her sucking face with some dude from down the street.”
“Yeah, well Holden’s girl was looking at him with puppy dog eyes, and she looked like she would have gotten on her knees in front of everyone if he’d say he loved her.”
There was a round of laughter. “Luke has it in the bag. Maybe after you break the news to her, I’ll be the one to pick up the pieces, and she’ll let me fuck her sadness away.”
“Fuck you dude. Leave her alone, okay?”
I was getting aggravated that I couldn’t hear who was saying what, but it didn’t matter. My stomach was sitting in my throat. Everything Veronica said was true. This all was for some big game, and I was a pawn for Luke to win.
“Dude, don’t tell me you’re falling for her. Roni would be pissed.”
“I’m not falling for her. But she’s a good girl, okay? I’ve gotten to know her is all,” Luke argued.
“Either way assholes, we’ve got another two hours before we call this thing. Keep your dates happy and their cups full,” someone else said.
I was going to throw up. Instead of breaking up their little charade and letting them know I heard everything they said, I rushed back into the house. Looking around frantically, my eyes darted everywhere in search of Macie or Dodger. I weaved in and out of people, bumping into some so hard I thought I’d fall over. I was trying to hold back the bile that was rising up in my throat, but I knew it was only a matter of time before I tossed my cookies. Just then strong arms wrapped around me, and I pushed back against the hold. I thought it was Luke who might have come inside to find me, but I heard Dodger near my ear.
“What’s the matter?” His deep voice was like a gentle stroke to my breaking heart. Turning into his arms, I pressed myself into his chest and let him hold me. Tears began to flow freely down my cheeks, and I could tell I was worrying him. Pulling back slightly he tipped my chin up. “Tell me what happened?”
I bit my quivering lip to keep from bursting out bawling. “I can’t talk about it right now. Can you just take me home?”
His blue eyes searched mine. “Did Luke do this? I’m going to kick his ass if he hurt you. Did he touch you?”
I shook my head. “No, no it was nothing like that. Please Dodger, I want to go home.”
He narrowed his eyes at me and nodded. “Let me see if I can find Macie. Give me just a second.”
I slowly made my way to the front door, when I heard Luke calling for me from the back of the house. Turning around I saw him waving and smiling at me, but it faded when he saw my face. He dropped his hand and started coming my way. I didn’t want to do this right now. I was too upset, and I wanted nothing more than to get out of these clothes and lay in my bed. If he got to me now, I’d be too tempted to slap him across the face for how he treated me. Dodger came striding up with Macie in tow, concern etched all over both of their faces.
“Hurry, we’ve got to go,” I said, desperate to get out of here and away from the noise of the speakers.
Dodger turned when he heard Luke call my name again. Glancing over my shoulder, regret was plastered all over him. I think he knew that I knew. Shouldn’t he be happy? He got what he wanted. He won his stupid contest. Now he could go back to Veronica and leave me alone.
“Keegan wait!” he shouted. Some people stopped what they were doing to watch the scene that was unfolding.
“Take her out to the car. I’ll be there in a minute,” he instructed Macie.
I grabbed his forearm and was shaking my head back and forth. “No Dodger. Leave it alone, okay? It was no big deal, I just want to go home. Please!” I begged.
Indecision warred on his face. He looked from me to my best friend, finally deciding that he wanted us to go ahead to the car without him. Not knowing what Dodger was going to do made me even sicker. I didn’t want him getting into any fights because of me. And sadly I didn’t want Luke to get hurt either. Macie took my hand and dragged me outside to the car. When I got to the curb, I bent in half and lost my dinner. Acid was burning my throat, and the taste of regurgitated alcohol made me retch again. Why was this happening to me? This was not how I saw tonight playing out. When my stomach was emptied of everything I’d ingested today, I climbed into the backseat of the car. Macie got in on the other side of me, and she pulled me down into her lap. With my head resting on her legs, I finally felt safe enough to let it go. The sob that tore from my chest was painful. I’d never felt so used before in my life. I held onto Macie like she were my lifeline. She was my safety net. She’d always been here for me, and I couldn’t be more grateful that my soft place to fall was here with me tonight.
“Wanna talk about it?” she asked quietly.
I shook my head. The driver’s door opened and closed. I lifted my head to see that Dodger had climbed in and was starting the car. His face was set in stone.
“What happened?” Macie asked him.
“Don’t worry about it. Let’s just get her home.” I saw him pick up his cell phone that he’d left in the cup holder, press a few buttons, and set it back down. I briefly wondered who he was texting but didn’t think much of it.
The drive home was short but quiet. Macie continued stroking her fingers through my hair, calming my nerves, and silently giving me strength. Neither of them asked any questions, but they knew Luke was the one who upset me. I’d tell them about it later, but right now I was thankful for their reticence. I had no doubt Macie was full of questions, but she knew me well enough to know that I wasn’t going to be talking anytime soon. The last time I was this upset was when Mom told me she was pregnant with Sarah. It turned my world upside down, and Macie came over to comfort me. We’d put N’Sync on repeat, and we ate chocolate ice cream well into the night. I didn’t really talk then either, I just drew from the strength and company of my best friend. I had needed to process how this was going to change things for me, how my life was going to be different. Right now was much the same. Luke’s little operation was hurtful. It had hit me to the core. Much of my life I never felt like I was special, like I deserved anything outstanding. Luke asking me out was the first time I really let my guard down and let myself think that I might actually be good enough for someone like him. Someone who was smart, handsome, charismatic, and fun: the fairy tale man. I was nowhere near falling in love with him. But opening up the box that even allowed that idea to penetrate my shell, the sheer thought that we could have had something special, made this hurt all that much worse. I erected walls up around me for a reason.
Pulling into the parking lot of the apartment complex, I sat up and wiped my eyes. Macie gave me a sad but knowing look. I was tired and ready to wash my face and go to sleep. Dodger opened my door and helped me out of the car. I’d slipped my heels off earlier so the ground was rough on my feet. Without even asking, Dodger came up and slid his arms under my knees and around my back, picking me up to carry me. It was a sweet gesture, and one I was grateful for. I rested my cheek on his chest as he climbed the steps and opened my front door. Macie was following behind us carrying my purse, jacket, and shoes. He stood to the side to let Macie in and kicked the door shut behind him. I looked up at him and gave him a tentative smile. It was all I could muster.