She nodded. "We lie to ourselves about how well we know each other."
"Too often, we try desperately to believe that this other person is the missing part of ourselves—even if only for the night. Maybe it isn't love, but... how about... friendship? Caring? Compassion?"
"Let's say I agree with you." Katya said. "I'm still not sure where you're heading."
"I think I've always known that the ideal of sexual chastity was just absurd. It seemed to go against nature. Why give a young man his greatest sex drive at fifteen, and tell him he can't indulge it until he's twenty? Clearly, this wasn't nature—it was harnessing a stallion to a plow. On the other hand, you can't just rut at will, either. Back on Earth, it led to so much unwanted pregnancy and disease and disruption that it fit the image of a mortal sin."
"Women aren't men," Katya said. "We see—feel things differently. And we want more. Here on Avalon we've been free to do everything we wanted—"
"Was it enough?"
"I don't know. We thought so, but—"
He nodded. "Did you want more of a courtship ritual?"
"Something like that. Everyone knows what everyone else's body looks like. Everyone talks about what everyone else is like in bed. There might be anticipation, but there isn't much mystery."
"And you want that?"
"Part of me does. Just a part, I think, but that part feels hungry."
"What would you like with Justin?"
"You know, there is something, but I don't quite have words for it. We've known each other all our lives. Sometimes we've been lovers, and sometimes not. Sometimes we haven't even been friends..."
"And now?"
"I don't know. Maybe it's just the discovery of a new land and all of that. But the only way to take this land is with children."
"That's the way we felt, a long time ago," Carlos said. "I think that we lost a little of that as soon as it became clear that the birth rate was going to be sufficient. But... on a place like this, so wide and broad. I'm not surprised."
"Something inside me just decided that Justin is the one."
Carlos let Katya take whatever time she needed to find the right words.
"Some little switch turned on by itself," she continued. "I thought that I had everything that I wanted, both freedom and security. But it turns out that I want something else. I want someone who belongs to me."
She looked up sheepishly. "Is that selfish? Is that petty?"
Carlos squeezed her hand. "No. It used to be what everybody wanted. Then we talked ourselves out of it. Maybe we're just rediscovering how much of that is in our basic natures. I've never been one to fight against my urges. Neither should you."
She grinned and squeezed his hand. Suddenly she jerked her head around, eyes darting as if tracking something invisible.
"What is it?" Carlos asked.
"Two bees," she said. "Moving like bullets."
Carlos adjusted his war specs until he saw two flashes. "They're going right across that valley," he said. "And over the next ridge." He estimated the distance. "Too far for today. Let's go back. We can start in the morning."
"I'll get Justin to pick us up," Katya said. She thumbed her comm card. "Justin—"
The computer answered. "Justin and Jessica have landed in a meadow and are temporarily out of communications," Cassandra said.
"Are they all right?"
"I have detected no cause for alarm," the computer said primly.
Jessica lunged backward, trying to rip herself free of the entangling web.
The forest was all deep shadow, vines and webbing strung among horsemane trees. In the shadow above him Justin caught a face like a snarling monkey, then the compact torso and long, long limbs that went with it. The beast wasn't moving. It was singing.
And Justin had dropped his pack, and with it his tracer, his knife, and all weapons. It would take a minute to run back to get them, and in a minute the creatures would be on her.
Jessica's face was turned away from the web, she had managed to get enough leverage to turn her head. "Justin! I can see four of them. They're just big Joeys... " Her voice died.
Little snarling faces. They sang with their mouths open... sang way back in their throats. Big Chaka had examined several spider devil bodies. Their song would have been perfect for slow dancing. Justin could make out hideous shadows moving into place around Jessica. One tapped along the web, crawling down toward Jessica.
Justin scooped up two rocks. His first missed entirely. His second struck one of the creatures, and it scuttled back up into the trees. But two others were crawling cautiously down, testing their footing every step of the way.
Damn, damn, damn. He and Jessica must be larger than anything the Joey-things ordinarily hunted, but would size alone keep them away?
Jessica screamed at them. They retreated for a moment, then started down the vine again. "Justin," she said, her voice deadly calm. "They're not scared of us. They're coming back down. Not a whole lot of doubt about that."
Justin pried at a nearby branch. Dammit, it was more vine than branch, and entirely too pliable. He tugged at it, and it just bent. It could have held his weight.
He was desperate. The loam underfoot was thick and soft; years of fallen leaves had decomposed to make the rich compost. No weapons there. He was naked, dammit.
Freezing hell! The first time in his life that he let lust overwhelm him and this happens?
He went to Jessica, who had managed to pry her face an inch or two away from the web. "I think," she said. "I think that maybe I can get out of this."
Justin tugged a rock out of the ground, and touched it to the web. He pulled. The mucilage was horribly strong. The spider devils were centimeters closer, and the lullaby was calming him against his will. If he had the radio, just the radio, he'd turn it on high and play them some old Riot Rap—
"Listen to me!" she said harshly, almost a whiplash. "You have to go back for the grendel guns. I can keep them away that long."
He had a sudden, horrific vision of the piglet, and the spidery things which injected it with venom, and then tore it to pieces.
"The hell I will."
"Justin!"
"The instant I go, they'll be all over you," he said. "We can barely keep them away with the two of us." And the wordless music was pulling him down to fatalistic despair.
Her breath was heavier now. "Well—it's the only chance we have. I can't break the glue."
"Sing!" Justin commanded.
"Sing? Sing what?"
"Anything! ‘For the beauty of our land, for the beauty of the skies.'
"
It was a children's song they'd learned in school. Jessica joined him.
" ‘For the love which from our birth. Over and around us lies—‘ "
The lullaby wavered, warbled out of tune and faltered. Encroaching spider devils backed away. This was something new. "It works! I can keep them off," Jessica said. "Get the guns!"
"It won't hold them. ‘Source of all, to thee we raise, this our hymn of grateful praise—‘ " Justin's mind ran feverishly. "Wait a minute," he said. "Let's just wait a minute. Look at this stuff. Remember what Chaka said? This isn't made from their own bodies. It's a patchwork, and the foundation is leaves. Chewed leaves. They spread this mucilage on top of it. And everything that they catch in here must struggle, so they have to keep patching it."