But I knew I had to be brave. Beryl was open-minded and considerate—she wouldn’t make me feel like a freak for what I wanted. This was my chance to actually, possibly have a sex life that was satisfying. A relationship that suited me. A relationship with Beryl, who I liked so much.
Okay, time to start with the whole brave thing. Maybe I could get it all done in one day and then I’d never have to be brave again. That sounded like a solid plan.
Taking a breath, I turned to face her. “Um, r-ready to see my true form?”
“Yes. Only if you want to show me.”
“I do, but… if it freaks you out, just tell me.”
She rolled her eyes. “I’ve seen demiurgus in their true forms before, Greid. It’s not going to freak me out, I promise.”
“Okay.” I fidgeted anxiously. “Um, do you—I need to get undressed, so…”
“Of course.” She turned her back on me, and I immediately felt kind of silly. I wanted to be with her. We were starting to navigate something new between us that would undoubtedly require me to get naked in front of her.
But this felt different. This wasn’t a sexy situation. I was about to turn into a big beastly-faced creature that looked nothing like the form Beryl knew me as.
Taking another deep breath, I pulled off my sweater, then my jeans. I usually stripped off completely, but no way in the deepest parts of hell was I running around with my cock and balls swinging around in front of Beryl. Leaving my boxer briefs on—god, I was going to look like such a dork—I concentrated on the shift.
It was a kind of ache that felt bad and good at the same time, as my spine and limbs lengthened and my jawbone distended. Like super bad cramps in your legs, but also the satisfying ache of a really good stretch when you first woke up.
My feet lengthened, the heels rising and lifting me onto the thick pads of my toes as my claws curved down into the earth. My lower spine ached as my tail grew until it reached mid-calf. My vision shifted as my pupils became vertical slits.
I flexed my fingers as my claws grew longer and sharper, better for gripping onto rocks. Stretching my spine with a satisfied grunt, I rose to my full height. Beryl looked even tinier than usual down below.
Resisting the urge to cover my monstrous face with my hair, I cleared my throat. “Um, okay. You can turn around.”
My voice was much deeper and raspier in this form, and I saw Beryl jump at the sound of it. Her eyes widened when she turned and saw me.
“Oh my word, you’re so tall,” she breathed.
“Uh, yeah. About another foot, I think.”
I dragged a toe claw through the dirt as she studied my changed face. I knew what she was seeing. A long snout with even sharper teeth, spikes trailing up the bridge of my nose and curving over my brow to connect with the ones framing my hairline. The fronds of my ears had grown longer, better for detecting vibrations in the dark. The smile lines that cut across my cheeks had split open wider from my lengthened lower face, revealing pale green gums.
“Even your tail’s grown.” She circled me as I held perfectly still. “And your skin looks a little different. Tougher.”
“Yeah, leathery.” I coughed awkwardly, the sound coming out wheezy.
Beryl stopped in front of me again and smiled at up me. “You’re beautiful, Greid. I mean, your other form is too, but like this you’re… majestic.”
I laughed, but it came out as an embarrassing snort through my nostrils. “I don’t think I’ve ever been called majestic while standing in my underpants before.”
She grinned, gaze dropping to my boxer briefs before shifting to my hands as they hung awkwardly by my sides. “Your claws are longer. And they look sharper.”
“Yeah.” I held up my hands and flexed them. “To dig. And grip onto rocks and stuff.”
“Are you a good climber like this?” she asked with interest.
“Um, yeah. I can… I can show you, if you want.”
Her eyes brightened, the light from the gemstones around us sparkling in them. God, she was so pretty. When were we going to kiss again?
Definitely not now, while I was like this. I was pretty sure I couldn’t kiss her with such a long snout—at least not well, without slobbering all over her face.
“Yes, please.” She looked around and spotted my nest, a fond smile tilting her lips. “Can I sit here?”
“Sure, of course.” I watched, fidgeting anxiously as she made her way over and settled in the centre of the nest, looking so small with her legs crossed and her head barely poking up over the rocks.
She looked at me expectantly once she was comfortable, so I cleared my throat and headed for the nearest wall. Gripping a jutting rock, I hoisted myself up with ease and began to scale the side of the deeproom, picking up speed as I neared the stalactites hanging above.
“Woah, you’re so fast.” Beryl laughed, eyes tracking me.
“Yeah.” Bending my legs, I leapt for the nearest stalactite and dug my claws in. My hair hung down in a curtain as I looked down at her and grinned.
She smiled back up at me, watching as I leapt for the next one, then the next. Oh no, the zoomies were back. Restless energy buzzed under my skin, power coiling in my muscles as I jumped between stalactites, then raced down the opposite wall and across the floor on all fours to do it again.
I heard Beryl laugh as I raced past her to do a lap around the room, my hands and feet thumping against rock and packed earth. I wasn’t any more coordinated in this form, so I skidded through the dirt a few times, climbing up the walls so I wouldn’t crash into them when I couldn’t slow down in time.
“Greid, I’ve never seen you move so fast,” Beryl called, making me slow as I loped across the room toward her. I was panting a little, my tongue lolling out of my mouth.
Breathless, I perched on one of the nest’s flat rocks and crossed my legs, my twin hearts pounding with exhilaration. “I’m ready to talk about stuff, Beryl.”
It felt easier while I was in this form, while we were down in this dark, deep room with the earth surrounding us. Like I could share all my secrets with her and they’d stay locked up in here.
Except these were secrets that would follow us back up. Hopefully, anyway. Unless Beryl was horrified by the things I wanted.
Well, she already knew one thing I wanted. I’d nearly died of embarrassment when I admitted it to her, the memory of Agma’s shock and disdain flashing in front of my eyes. The way she’d recoiled, shaking her head and telling me it wasn’t normal for me to want that.
I shoved back the memories to see Beryl blinking in surprise. But she nodded, wriggling her butt to get comfier in the nest. I wanted to curl up in there with her. Maybe take a nap in the dark and quiet of the deeproom while clinging to her soft frame.
“Okay.” She smiled at me. “If you feel ready. Wait, have you smoked today?”
“No, I haven’t. And I do feel ready, but…” I dragged a claw over the rock. “I don’t really know… Um, I mean, what do you want to know?”
“Well…” She cocked her head. “I noticed while I was watching the porn that it all seemed really aggressive between demiurgus. Like they were all constantly fighting for dominance. For the upper hand in the situation.”
I cringed. “Yeah.”
She was watching me carefully. “Do you like that?”
I shook my head immediately. “No. No way. I’m not, um, at all dominant. Agma hated it.” I grimaced, hunching my shoulders. “Sorry for bringing her up again.”