Other than a few lingering shivers, I didn’t move. I didn’t speak as he got into a more comfortable position behind me, his broad chest cupping my back, his thighs drawn up under my feet. Beneath his wing, he tossed his arm over my body, his forearm and wrist plastered against my own crossed arms, his fingers coming up to rest at the base of my throat.
Why was he holding me like this? Why had he brought me here when he seemed to have absolutely no idea where to go now or what to do with me?
“What do you want?” I whispered.
He gave me no answer.
And neither did my dreams when they came creeping in.
CHAPTER NINE
Suvi
Iwoke up slowly and then all at once.
At first, I relished the feeling of half-sleep. I was so warm. The blankets on our bunks on the ship were pretty sad, thin affairs. I wasn’t usually this cozy when I came to. It was nice. I didn’t want to wake all the way back up.
But when the blanket moved of its own accord, I did. My eyes flew open, not seeing anything but a wall of gold-spangled green. The alien’s wing was still tossed over me in a warming embrace. So was his arm and even his tail. It almost felt protective.
Or possessive.
Probably the latter, considering he’d taken me from my people and seemed to have no intention of letting me out of his sight.
Is he asleep?
There was no movement behind me apart from the even rise and fall of his chest against my back. I turned slowly and carefully, heart like a hummingbird in my throat, until I was facing him.
He appeared to still be asleep. I’d been right last night – he really had exhausted himself with everything that had happened yesterday, and maybe whatever else he’d been doing before that. I paused to study him. It was clearly morning outside, as sunlight was spilling through cracks into the lean-to. It dimmed the bright effect of his lights, but not by much. Before I could stop myself, I reached forward and tentatively brushed one of the glowing spots on his chest. I breathed in sharply, feeling what could only be described as energy buzzing in that spot. The light was warmer than his scales, and it almost seemed to vibrate softly under my touch.
I withdrew my hand, feeling almost guilty for touching him, even though he was the one who’d come in here and smooshed himself up against me all night. Thankfully there was still no evidence of male genitalia – nothing seemed to be poking or prodding me from anywhere – and that was an immense relief. I began to wonder how his biology and reproductive system worked before I shut down that line of thinking like dropping a dark curtain on my own brain. I did not need to go there right now. What I needed to do was figure out my next steps.
Do I really risk it – trying to get away from him?
So far, this planet hadn’t proved as hostile as I’d feared. I wasn’t much of a survivalist, but I could probably figure out how to catch fish in the river. The cottony puffs on the plants could be used to make clothing or bedding. There would be no way to know what food here would kill me, of course, but I wouldn’t have a better chance in that department even with the alien, considering I was a completely new and different species.
He hadn’t really seemed fazed by how different I was, now that I thought about it. He didn’t exactly appear to consider me an alien, not in the way I thought of him being alien, at least. Maybe there were bipedal, human-like animals where he was from. Maybe he thought of me as some sort of pet...
I stared at his sleeping face as these thoughts rolled through me. His thick dark hair was cast back from his face in a way that almost looked elegant, in a wild and undone sort of way. His brow was smoothed in sleep, his thick lashes cast downward on the right side of his face. On the left was the mangled pit of where the other eye had once been. I felt my mouth pulling in a sympathetic grimace because the wound looked like it had healed badly and it had to have caused an immense amount of pain. I shouldn’t have felt sorry for him – I knew that. But I did. I’d always been like that. I was the kid who cried over things like flowers getting crushed underfoot.
I wondered who could have been strong enough—or trusted enough—to have gotten close enough to wound him like that. He’d crashed into a planet like an asteroid and clawed his way out of the hole unscathed, right before my eyes. Who could have possibly caused a being like him any damage?
Then I remembered that there were others somewhat like him. Like the being who’d appeared on the first planet, throwing tsunamis of snow against the soldiers like he was tossing bits of paper. I thought about Torrance left behind there, no doubt killed by him, and wanted to break down.
There was still no sign of the alien waking. My bladder throbbed. Cautiously and as quietly as possible, I scooted down his body, wriggling out from the canopy of his wing and the warm weights of his arm and tail. Frankly, I was kind of shocked that none of my moving had woken him. If he always slept this deeply, I might actually have a shot at getting away from him if I tried.
I decided that right now I’d start with something smalclass="underline" getting away from him long enough to pee in private.
I crawled out of the lean-to, then shakily stood. I winced, immediately regretting the fact I hadn’t taken off my sodden boots last night. They felt awful and squishy and my feet were clammy and gross. I kicked them off and peeled off the damp socks, placing them all in a sunny patch in the grove of trees. I picked a tree on the other side of the grove, near the edge closest to the river, and went around it before pulling my pants and underwear down and crouching. I breathed out slowly and peed, using that quiet moment to take in my surroundings.
This really was a beautiful place. Everything that had been bronze and black and silver last night was now golden green. Long blades of grass and the stalks of the reeds and rushes near the river were lush and verdant. The rocks at the shore almost looked like slabs of marble, blue and gold streaking and swirling together. The sandy soil was golden brown, and the river ahead shone like a liquid mirror. Buzzing insects and the calls of cawing birds filled the air in a way that felt at once alien and familiar.
After crouching for a while, my legs began to protest. I hadn’t thought ahead to what I’d use to wipe and sighed. One of the cottony puffs would probably work, but I’d have to get over there first. After a quick glance around told me nothing appeared to be ready to jump out and swallow me whole, I crouch-waddled out of the grove of trees to a patch of rushes, grabbing the tall green stalk of the nearest one and bending its fluffy tip down to my level. The cottony puff at the top was slightly tapered, shaped like the flame of a candle. I fingered the soft fluff of it, marvelling at the way thin threads of copper-coloured metal seemed to grow right from the plant itself.
I examined the soft puff thoroughly, gently pulling it apart with my fingers and bending the threads of metal. The last thing I wanted was to dab this between my legs only to find out too late that there was some kind of stinging insect inside. Or to find out that I’d just put the alien version of a Toxicodendron species like poison ivy directly against my pussy.
But as far as my eyes and fingers could tell, the cottony stuff was just as benign as it appeared. I waited another few moments, making sure no irritation cropped up on my hands. I knew that something like a Toxicendron reaction could show up hours or even days after exposure, so I was still taking a bit of a chance, but there didn’t seem to be any oil or sap coming off the soft fluff that could cause a problem.