“What was in the bag?”
“I was told not to look until the order came.”
I thought about questioning her about why she didn’t look, but I knew she would give me the you’re-just-a-stupid-undisciplined-American spiel. I abstained. Instead, I just let her meander down whatever road she wanted to travel. And damn was it a windy road.
“The night before the power went out, Tom asked to see me.”
This was getting odder. I was glad Sam had stepped outside. He didn’t need to hear what she was saying, because, and while I wasn’t entirely sure about their relationship timeline, what Tish was telling me at that moment seemed to contradict what I did know, which was, Sam would’ve disagreed.
“I don’t know why, but I agreed. Tom wanted to be with me; he didn’t want to live without me. I told him I couldn’t give him what he wanted. He was drunk and said things he knew would hurt me. I sulked that night away plus the next day, crying like a silly fool. I allowed myself to get so messed up over it, I couldn’t focus on anything. I didn’t even look at the phone, much less keep it in the box like I was supposed to. When the power went out, so did it. I had no clue what I was supposed to do, but then you asked me to come along. You gave me another chance to redeem myself.”
The thing that kept bouncing around in my mind as she talked was how in the world didn’t our intelligence agencies not notice some of the things they were doing. After all, they were moving freight containers full of sophisticated electronics into the U.S., EMP weapons, and who knew what else.
Over time, though, I learned how they managed to keep their secrets. It was a combination of them using something as simple as hand-written letters and snail-mail, but also as complex and all-encompassing as them infiltrating and embedding themselves so deeply into our society that their reach had almost no bounds.
The Order had managed to infiltrate government at nearly every level, state, local, and federal. Not only that, but they also had people in critical positions spread out across every state, manning, and leading our infrastructure programs. They had people who were leaders in our power grid. Big wigs in civil engineering. Hell, they had high-ranking people in the military, not to mention who knows how many grunts. It was a colossal shit show that was seventy-plus years in the making. Needless to say, it was a bad deal for the U.S.
“The box you were given was a Faraday box, correct?” Avery asked.
She shrugged. “It was just a box, to me.”
Knowing Avery like I did, I signaled that I needed to ask the questions. Luckily, he was so enthralled with the phone and the trying to learn Korean, he didn’t put up much of a fight.
“So, what was your plan, then?” I asked.
“I didn’t have one. Just go along with things until the time was right.”
“It’s a shame Tom had to die in the meantime.”
“You don’t understand us. We’re willing to do anything for our cause. It’s what we live for.”
Avery being Avery, he couldn’t stay reticent. “But you failed your mission because you cared about one of your enemies.”
“It won’t happen again.”
“Tell us about the Grays,” I said, regretting having chosen to bring up Tom.
“I don’t know anything about them.”
“How… What?”
“I was as surprised as you were.”
“How do I know you’re telling me the truth?”
“You don’t.”
“It doesn’t bother you that you weren’t told about them?”
“I believe I would’ve been had I not lost my focus. Everything I needed was probably in the bag I was given.”
Avery’s voice held an uncharacteristic hint of emotion, as he asked, “Why would you tell us anything if we are the enemy?”
I watched as Tish’s eyes grew colder. The anger dissipated as quickly as it came. Whatever her motivation was, she was trying to remain calm. “Just having a conversation.”
Avery’s stare lingered on Tish for an uncomfortably long while before finally turning towards me. His pinched lips and odd expression made me wonder exactly what he was thinking. He didn’t share. In fact, he decided to join Sam outside.
I heard muffled voices from the rear of the Ripsaw, followed shortly by vibrations through the floorboard. Sam and Avery were using the time to sure up the fuel line that had been nicked earlier. Me, on the other hand, I was struggling with Tish’s sudden loquaciousness. That her eyes rarely ever turned away from the empty darkness just outside her window told me she was either hoping someone would swoop in and save her or worse, she knew someone was going to. That or maybe I was just paranoid. But I guessed Avery had picked up on the same thing. Why he had chosen not to speak on the matter was almost as much a mystery as what Tish knew or hoped for.
It was time for me to do what I knew I had to do.
“Kelley told me you were part of the Order. I didn’t believe her. I couldn’t make myself believe her. So, I guess some of Titouan’s death is on me. I have to live with that. But I’ll get some little bit of solace knowing the longer you live out there alone in the darkness and cold, the longer you’re going to suffer. And I ain’t going to lie. I want you to live as long as possible.”
I remember her look to this very day. There was an equal measure of fear and surprise in her eyes. She thought I was weak. That I would fight tooth and nail trying to persuade her, she could still be one of us. She was so very wrong. She was past saving.
As Tish turned away from the window, the soft, beautiful features that defined her face were gone. Replaced with the hard lines shaped by hatred, I barely recognized her as she spoke. “You’ll be right behind me, William. You aren’t long for this world.”
“I’m coming around to it. You, on the other hand, well…” There was no reason to talk to her any longer.
I packed her enough food for a couple meals and water to last a couple days. I also gave her two blankets. Sam shook his head in disgust the entire time I was preparing her things. I think he was in shock by what was happening, not to mention heartbroken. She wasn’t just walking out the door and moving into an apartment across town. Tish was going to die. Sam had to wade through the emotions of anger, hurt, and despair before he could ever get to the betrayal that was lying on the back shelf. I hated Tish even more for what she had done to Sam.
I told her to get out of the truck. She complied without protest. I motioned for Sam to be ready, and then I removed the duct tape from her hands and handed her the backpack. She said she wanted to go to Barrow, so I pointed her in that direction.
We watched her walk as far as our headlamps cast light, her silhouette slowly overtaken by the darkness. I felt no sadness for her. As she faded away into the night, I couldn’t help feeling a little regret for not shooting her and leaving her bleeding like she had Titouan. I think I didn’t because of Sam and Avery. They weren’t ready for that yet. I turned and walked towards the Ripsaw.
According to the GPS we had Thirty miles left to Prudhoe Bay, but the terrible terrain and the two-time-jerry-rigged gas line was a horrible combination. We had leaked as much fuel as we had burned. All our fuel cans were empty. We had exactly what was in the tank and not a drop more. I glanced at the gas gauge and then the GPS before asking Sam what he thought about the fuel situation.
He didn’t bother looking at the gauge. “We good.”
I played along. “That’s good.”
He gave me a sideways glance and then shook his head. “Hope we done fixed ’at line last time. Ain’t no more duct tape.”
“You remember that red light outside my office?” I asked.
“Why wouldn’t I? You griped ’bout it all the time.”