She knew she shouldn’t complain because it wasn’t like she had to spend time away from them. She could see them any time she wanted. But she’d miss their comfortably full bed, all four of them tangled together after making love.
All through his meeting, Aaron constantly referred to his hand-held, both notes he’d made earlier and to take notes of points made by the hub’s retrofit crew manager. He couldn’t concentrate. His mind lay elsewhere, his sleep the night before ragged and ripped apart by the nightmares again, despite having had Emi all to himself.
Maybe because of it. He hadn’t dared wake her to talk, and he’d sworn Ford to silence. He’d desperately missed Ford’s quiet solace in bed to steady him as he’d always had in the past.
Emi might rip him a new one if she found out he wasn’t talking to her about this, but he wasn’t ready to dump that burden on her yet. No matter how much he loved her and despite her medical background, Ford was the one he knew he could unburden himself on and not crush him under his emotions. The way he’d always been able to rely on him.
When he returned to the Tamora Bight later that afternoon after his meetings, he checked the ship’s locator sensors and knew Emi worked down in the hydro lab while Caph still slept in their cabin. He headed to the galley, where Ford was taking inventory, and made himself some lunch. Ford sat across from Aaron at the galley table and aimed a pointed gaze at him.
After a few minutes of silence, he quietly said, “Tell me, Aar. Don’t hold it in. Not with me. Never with me, you know that.”
Aaron looked down at his sandwich, his appetite temporarily deserting him. “More of the same shit, different night.” He pushed the plate away. “They’d gotten better. Then when we met Emi, I thought they’d be gone for good.”
“She’s been the best damn thing to ever happen to us. I think you and I agree on that.”
“Then why are my nightmares coming back?” he wondered, more to himself than Ford. “Why now, when I’m happier than I’ve felt since…” He couldn’t say it, but he knew Ford understood what he meant.
Since Kels’ death.
Ford shrugged. “You’re worried. It’s the first time we’ve had her on a mission with us. You’re afraid you can’t protect her. I don’t need Emi’s psych degree or empath skills to know that.”
“The past several fucking nights. Every goddamned night. I haven’t dreamed this bad in years!”
Ford reached across the table and laid his hand over Aaron’s. He waited until Aaron finally looked him in the eye to speak again. “Don’t shut her out. Let her help you with this. You know she can. She’ll want to.”
“I don’t want her knowing about the dark times. She doesn’t deserve that. She has enough of her own shit to deal with the way she lost her parents.”
“She already knows the basics. She knows what I could tell her about what happened. I think when you can bring yourself to open up to her and talk to her about it all, tell her the story in your words, not mine.” Ford squeezed Aaron’s hand before he released it and sat back in his chair. “One day, you have to face this, get it out of you, quit holding it in. This is her job. Not just as our wife, but as our med officer. Don’t you trust her?”
“Of course I do! How can you even ask me that?”
“Then trust her skills. Trust that she can deal with this. Trust her to help you through it. She won’t just be pissed if she finds out you’ve been holding back, she’ll be hurt.”
“Hurt?”
“Oh, come on, Aar! You can’t be that frakking dense. Let her in the way you’ve let me in. I’d be willing to bet that when you do, then you can put the nightmares to rest for good.”
They enjoyed a final night out together the evening before their scheduled departure from the hub. After six weeks of staring at Earth from nearly three hundred miles above the surface, Emi would leave it completely behind.
They ate in a quiet corner booth at Charlie Tacos. Fortunately, despite the name, the restaurant offered a wide variety of fare, cuisine from all over the globe now spinning beneath them. The men’s excitement and pleasant nervous tension rolled through Emi throughout dinner as they talked about the ship, the journey to Mars, and last-minute details. Emi remained quiet and listened, not having much to contribute to the conversation. This was their bailiwick.
Then she felt a quiet melancholy take Aaron over. He lifted his glass as Caph and Ford also fell silent. Emi picked up her glass. He turned his brown eyes on her. Held in his intense gaze, Emi listened as he gave his toast.
“I know we sort of did this before we left Earth, but this is our first mission together as not just crew, but real family. Babe, you have no idea how much we love you and are glad you chose us. I promise that, no matter what, we’ll take care of you.” They all touched glasses together in the middle of the table, but Aaron’s eyes never left hers. “Crew first,” he softly said.
She smiled. “Crew first,” she and the others repeated.
They returned to the Tamora Bight and fell into bed. She sensed the men’s shift from anticipation to be underway to their urgent need to be together one last time, like this, in a way they wouldn’t normally be able to enjoy every night. A farewell of sorts, only without the sad undertones of a good-bye.
The men slowly took their time undressing her, kissing every bit of bared flesh as they removed her clothes. By the time she lay naked and writhing with need in the middle of their bed, the three men stared down at her with nearly identical expressions of lust branded on their faces.
“You guys going to sit there and stare, or are you going to get naked?” she teased.
“Get naked,” they all echoed. The twins laughed while Aaron rolled his eyes and sighed.
“And so it begins,” he said with a playful smirk. “I’m telling you, Em, twinspeak gets really old, really fast.”
The men quickly stripped. Aaron knelt over her and kissed her. He teased her, gently tracing her lips with his tongue, his touch so light it almost tickled.
Emi wrapped her arms around him and sighed as she felt Ford and Caph massage her feet and legs. Aaron lifted his head so he could look into her eyes. “Tell us what you want, babe.”
“I want all of you.” It didn’t matter to her how or where, as long as they were together. At any time during their mission she could make love with any of them, but to have them all at once, even if just the feel of their flesh against hers, completed her.
Aaron kissed her again, then blazed a hot and moist trail with his lips along her jaw, behind her ear, down her neck to the base of her throat. She closed her eyes and reached out with her empathic senses, drank in their passion and love. It only compounded her desire.
Aaron didn’t stop there. He moved lower and latched his mouth onto one of her nipples while he teased the other with his hand. He used his tongue and teeth to bring the one to a hard peak. Then he switched to the other and repeated the process. She felt her clit throb in response, every pull of his mouth on her breast triggering a responding pulsation between her legs.
He continued his southerly journey until she felt his hot breath on her clit. He pushed her thighs wider apart with his palms and gently nuzzled his lips against her.
As one, Ford and Caph changed position. Each man latched onto one of her breasts, drawing a long, low moan from her. She twined her fingers in their hair and held on. How could she not love this exquisite pleasure?